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HI,

 I am  with my boyfriend from 3 years now and for the same amount of time he is been with his 2nd girlfriend who is his fiance too. He says that he love me alot and he cannot leave me . At the same time he is not ready to leave his fiance too, he says that he have to do that marriage beacuse of the family purpose. I really love him but i cannot stand when he is with his fiance, it just makes me mad.He is way too older than me, My Parents are not even agreed for our relationship but i still want to be with him. I asked him if he wants to be with me than he have to choose one but he just goes out of track and never did what i want from him. i am so stressed out that i even thought of attempting suicide. PLease help me out and tell me what should i do. The only thing that keeps killing me is his fiancee . Should i leave him , Because i tried to leave him but i never successed coz i am like addicted to him ,,, Please please please tell me what should i do, your suggestions , advises , comments will be highly appericated . Let me know if any one have any question in their mind, I will be happy to answer them. Thank you

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Hi Lively,

Leave him now and don't look back.

He's using you.  He knows what to say to keep you and you keep coming back.

It will be hard but you can do this.  Just walk away and don't look back.  You've given up 3 years of your life to this guy and he can't commit.  
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for one, suicide is not an option, nobody should kill themselves over someone else and anyways, it's not gonna do you any good.

If you are unhappy and he's unwilling to give up one or the other, be the wise one to walk away.  A relationship means commitment and respect and he obviously isn't respecting you and your feelings.

I ain't saying it's gonna be easy to pull it off but speaking by experience, being loved by someone that respects you, is ready to make concessions and is faithful is a much more rewarding relationship than being the third wheel of the cart.  You can leave and be nice about it, you don't have to throw stuff at his face or be mean.  You simply tell him that you wish he would understand that you need a steady and exclusive relationship and that it's not suiting you that he sees someone else.   You don't argue and you walk away.

If, like medic-dan said, he's using you, listening to his excuses will only possibly drag you back to him.  Just express your opinion speaking about how YOU feel then walk away.  It'll give him something to think about before bed.


Good luck!
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Thank you medic-dan, thank you guest for your answers. Actually I tried many times to leave him by fighting with him for no reason but at the end of the day we again ends up being one . I know loving two girls at the same time is more like cheating instead of love . But I am like addicted to him as if I can do nothing without him . He is a talking parrort , he never helps me finically instead I helped him all the times I send him gifts and all that bit he never did Amy of this stuff, all he do is talking that he loves me alot and he is keep doing that from past 3 years . I need to get out from this relation of he is no more angree to leave his fiancé for me bit I don't know how. Please guys help me out and give me some ideas and suggestions that how can I leave him so he would also realize that he was wrong. As if I leave him now without any reason he would blame mr that I need freedom or I need new guy as he always does blame and torture me. Please make a situation for me so I can get out from this relationship and take a deep breath in fresh air. Please please please help me tell me what should I ask him so we can be separated .
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Lively,

You don't need to make him mad at you to leave him.  This is about YOU taking control of YOUR life, not him.  Just walk away, NOW!  Don't look back, don't listen to excuses, just go.  Move on with YOUR life.

You are not going to make him feel bad.  He got what he wanted for 3 years.  I don't think it will bother him a bit.

Don't make the fiancee be the bad person either.  She's no different than you are sorry to say.  Look closely at her, that's how she sees you.


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Hey , I never made him feel guilty or bad about his fiancé . Even though I never mentioned that I don't Want to see him with his fiancé and I guess that's natural . If u lOve some one you get jealoused easily when you see them with another girl or guy. After spending these three years with me he also felt that it is hard for him to live without me . Let me tell u the story from the beginning how he gets engaged . This girl who is his fiancé right now she tells him that she loves him. And he being sensible proposed her right away they even though he don't even know her very well or he himslf wasnt in love with that girl , the love was from the girl's side he just thinks that the girl is good and love him as well so he purpose her. I wasn't in his life at that point when I came into his life their families start getting togethr and their engagement ceremony happened in my presence and we were both together and in love when his engagement happened. How it's being thre years since thAn. He said to me I was wrong , I should wait that's my mistake that I proposed his fiancé right away whereas he truly loves me need me as a wife wants me in his life instead of his fiancé . These are his words , I know some how his love is true . But I need lots of guts to move on coz I really madly love him . Please tel me if something else comes into ur mind. I will be very thankful to you & if u hav any questions just let me know . Takecare
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PleAse please please tell me something guys..:(
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move on like someone else said, he's using you.
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U think he loves you because he says he does, but actions are louder than words...LEAVE HIM. It is not a healthy relationship. He's using you as an ego boost because he is very selfish and probably grew up with a dysfunctional family. Sorry for late response lol! I know a girl that's in your position. The guy she was with was my ex who cheated on me to be with her. But i know he's cheating on her because when we were all 'together' lol, he would show her txts from different women. He likes to feel adored and loved. Looking back now, I feel bad for that girl. I have moved on and am engaged with a different man who loves me and is dedicated to me :)

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