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I posted about my problem in another post, but I need some advice on this topic, I'm wondering now, if my boyfriend might not be as much bipolar as he is depressed....

Here we go:

My boyfriend and i have been having a rough 2 weeks, he is in a very low point. I have never seen him have ups or down until 2 weeks ago (we have been dating 1.5 years)

He just became distant, and although we still had sex it wasn't as much, he still tells me he loves me, and wants me in his life, but starting 2 weeks ago he was getting these thoughts that he needs to be alone, he doesn't know what or what triggered this. But....1.5 months ago we had thought about moving in together, and this caused a high stress time, I still think that this low time might be related to that.

I recently found out, after asking him last night, if this has happened before. and it has.

His last girlfriend of a couple months, came home telling him one day she was pregnant, they had had sex twice and protected on his part. He had his doubts that this was his baby, but none the less he had to worry. so this triggered his low time. And they ended up not having the child, or continuing the relationship. It was a lost cause to begin with.

The girlfriend before that, of 5 years he had these downs several times, it was not a healthy relationship for him, from what i understand. He was the sole supporter, she had no goals or ambition, she didn't let him do things on his own etc.

Could my boyfriend be having commitment issues, but could this be causing depression? Or does this sound like bipolar?

Sat. night he told me we had to take some time apart, i need to give him some space and time to figure this out. And because he loves me so much, and can't stand hurting me, he doesn't want me to be dragged into this. So i have listened and I'm keeping my distance, its hard, I cry alot. I worry...but i know if I want him in my life I have to agree to keep my space.

He had planned to meet a therepist (last thursday he booked the appointment) and he is to meet him tonight, actually as I'm typing this he is at the meeting. for him to seek help now, i realize he wants to get better, and knows he needs to do something.

(read my other post in the relationship section to read the whole story)

Any advice on this would be of great help.

-Canadian Girl


You probably know that exact cause of bipolar disorder is can’t be pinpointed, but the fact that full name of this condition is bipolar affective disorder can tell you something about situation you two are going through now. This condition mainly involves disturbances in affective (or emotional) states and these disturbances can manifest themselves as change form manic to depressive mood or as a change between strong manic or depressive mood and relatively “regular” mood. So, it could be just depression phase then “nothing” then depression phase. It comes down to which medication work best – probably someone found out that bipolar disorder medication help your boyfriend to have a better life so it would be pointless to treat him with anti-depressants and to try to fit him into set of symptoms.
I think that he, regardless of the other person in a relationship or of his own qualities, always has a more or less present feeling that he is different or some kind of trouble for the other one. But it seems to me that he is trying his best – seeing a therapist is probably best for him right now, and yes, you do have to respect his wishes for space, but also I think you have to use every chance that is appropriate to reassure him that you know what he is dealing with and that you accept him for who he is.


Maybe he has Aspergers. (A rare of autism) I'm an Aspie myself.