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My partner and his ex wife share custody of their 2 kids, the oldest being a 12 year old girl. She is mature for her age but we are getting worried. She has a different boyfriend every few weeks, the latest being a 14 year old who is pressuring her to do more than kiss. She is easily led and we are worried she will give in. Is it a good idea to put her on the pill? Or will this give her the green light to sleep with him? People say talk to her about consequences of having sex, but what do you actually say? We are not only worried for her health, but for her reputation as well. Help please!

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Hi, if she's going to give in anyway and sleep with him wouldn't it be better she was on the pill?

When i was 12 i went on the pill, my mum was worried too that id be pressured into having sex. She sat me down and spoke openly with me about sex in a way that didnt make me feel stupid. She outlined the risks and expressed her concerns. I was seeing an older lad who suggested we should have sex and at the time I thought if i didnt then hed dump me!

I went on the pill but it certainly didnt give me the green light to sleep with him. Id taken on board what my mum had said to me and respected how open she was with me as sex ed at school wasnt very good! If you treat her like an adult she will respect you more and you say shes mature so surely she will think things through before doing more with this boy? I didnt sleep with my boyfriend, infact i finished with him.

I think its a good idea to put her on the pill, its like i said before, if she does decide to have sex youd be protecting her against unwanted pregnancy. Id have a chat with her and see how she feels about it all. Talk about everything that you are worried about ie health/reputation but you musnt give her a lecture!

x
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