I'm a thirteen year old girl and for about 3 months or longer I have been dealing with depression and i fear it's getting worse. Many things have happened over time and i feel like i'm going to explode. Last year It started with my old best friend emily saying rumors about me and getting furious at me for trying to help her with her depression. She lied to people saying i said awful things to her and that i was stupid, ugly, a b***h, etc. . She got a gang of "followers" on facebook and each one of them posted things i don't want to remember. "why are you such a b***h? don't you realize everyone hates you?" "youre just jealous because she's prettier than you" "i can't believe you would say that to emily! dirty hoe" "Keep away from her! you'll catch her disese"
The thing i remeber the most was the text i saw first from emily. "Fine i dont wantt to be your friend anyway, i have waayy better friends that understand me, not like your stupid ass. This sh*t is over. Oh and you might want to check your facebook wall, I DARE YOU! :)
After i saw the messages i went into panic mode and freaked out. Ever since that happened, people act diffrent towards me. Other things have happened from my boyfriend cheating on me with my bestfriend, who didnt even care that she was destroying my feelings, financial problems, family issuess, fake friends, my bestfriend that is anorexic and in denial that i am trying to help but now i think she hates me, my crush that iv'e loved since i can remember, we were like best friends. I try to talk to him but he says he doesnt like me, not even as a friend. i havent done anything to him. I just found out he has attempted suicide and i think its my fault. My parents hate me too. I'm sorry if this is a lot but thats the point, all of this and more has caused my eating habits to lessen, my depression to rise, two attempted suicides and self injury. I just want this to stop, i want to slow down time because it seems like life is moving too fast and i want out.
If you have any questions please ask away. i just want to feel normal again
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btw i am not officialy diagnosed with depression, blame that on my parents believing that being REALLY depressed is just a normal part of a teens life and that i shouldnt be whining to them about it. My friends and family have noticed i've been depressed and i have too, i think that is enough evidence.
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