I fell in love with much younger man

Suellen2 - I'm a Pisces and he's a Libra and that's not supposed to work at all! But it does.... My ex husband is a Scorpio. Go figure. I think the fact that they are complete opposites in every way is part of the attraction for me. I hope it isn't mainly that and I hope it isn't fleeting.

I posted some moths ago...my boyfriend is 28. I am 47. I have thought and thought and thought. I waited a life time for this man. I love his smile, his sense of humor.,..his beautiful blue eyes. No different than I would a man my own age. I've been married...to a man older than I...and you know what?? I was still his mother...not old enough to be his mother....but, had to play the role just the same. As well as being a mother to his children. No more. I will do what makes me happy. I will be with the man that loves ME, and loves my little boy..age be damned. He respects me in a way that no man of my own age ever has. I'll take the stares, and the whispering behind my back. For real love...it's worth it.

Im going crazy with frustration here, I posted several replies and they all seem to have got lost.....in cyber space or somewhere!

Linickmom, good for you, my circumstances were different. I have tried to get my head around why it's Ok for men to be older than women and nobody bats an eyelid, but, we women are laughed and sniggered at.

I was so happy for that year I was with my guy, luckily he looked a little older than 38, and I hope I look a little younger than 53.

He is Pisces just like me, and we are both romantic x

He is now the one more heartbroken than me, but, he wouldn't go against his culture and returned to the arranged marriage.In one way it was a blessing as my own grown up children would not accept this. My eldest is 34.

I feel in the past few weeks an inner peace, the pain is subsiding, there is still a void, and I'm not looking for anyone to fill it.

He was everything i could have asked for in a relationship, and he felt the same. He said I thought him about love, he was adorable, but, never mine to keep.

@Shopgirl........my thoughts are with you-;))

 

 

 

 

SO SO SO AWESOME. Thank you for sharing.

Marcella, I am sorry for your circumstance. Thank you forsharing your experience though... it has helped.

Well Shopgirl, we are all in the same boat, solidarity and all that. I never thought it could happen to me, and I would have laughed a few years ago if someone had told me I would fall head over heels for a younger man.

I used to look at Demi Moore and be cynical about her marriage to Ashton Kutcher!! Poor her, she seems to be losing the plot now.

I know that my love will take a long time to diminish, and only God knows what is around the corner for me, but, I do hope that he's not a younger one. If you read my earlier posts, even though I was on cloud nine, I felt it hard work to keep looking good............although it made me watch my weight etc.lol.

My one wish now is for my heart to mend, I know i have a long road ahead. Sharing with you ladies does help, thanks for listening -;))

I am well into my 4th day with no contact. This has never happened before. I am so worried he does not want to see me any more.

I can't talk to my friends as they all think it is silly and I will only end up getting hurt. I feel the hurt is starting and the strength of it makes me realise how much I care for him.

I do not want to be the one who makes contact again so I will wait to see if he reappears. We have a day out planned for Feb 5th and maybe this is his roundabout way of getting out of it? When a guy likes you they do anything to be in your company so I think I am getting my answer about how he feels about me :(

BigCat, don't feel alone, you can talk to us, to me, we don't think you are silly. I've been there, believe me! Having said that, it never went 4 days without contact, maybe a day maximum. Don't make contact, well, I don't think you should. Unless you call him or text and ask...., u ok? Just casually, see what he says?

i hope you get some response, be it negative or positive, something to indicate how he is feeling about you.

Men....pfttttt

 

 

 

Thank you Marcella25 :)

We rarely went a day without contact until recently, which is why I am so worried.  I am so tempted to text but the reality is if I meant anything to him he would not leave such a long gap.  

I am trying to tell myself it's best to get hurt sooner rather than later.  I guess I will contact him nearer the 5th and see what happens then.  

I finally got logged in properly. BigCat, you do sound worried, now, as I suggested( just my own opinion) send a casual text, maybe saying, hi, u ok, nothing heard? Still on for the 5th, if not, it's ok, no big deal.

See what he sends back. I think if you wait till the 5 Feb. you will torture yourself.... Just saying.

 

You are right it is torment not knowing, but I think I should stick it out a bit longer.  I am trying to accept he's not that bothered about me as I need to get used to the idea and move on.  

I think I can hold out till Feb 2nd, which is a reasonable day to mention a trip on the 5th.  I am convinced he has gone back to his girlfriend. She dumped him in the summer and he was really hurt by it. I think when I met him he was still in touch with her. 

If we do go out on the 5th I will ask him.

So I gave in and texted. Had a short conversation, which stopped for a bit when I asked when we could meet.

He has replied now and the 5th is still on and we might get together before then :). This is all good but it does seem to mean he only sees me as a friend :(

I go in and out of the friend zone all the time also.... mostly in my head because reading these guys is so difficult. Something my guy said to me recently keeps sticking with me though and I think it's something we all should keep in mind. After we had a period of inactivity, I finally "gave in" and contacted him. He didn't think it was rude at all and he was able to immediately go right into the comfortable place we had, although a little more attentive. Out of the blue he says "Aren't you bored of me?" I was surprised by the comment thinking, "Are you kidding?!? I hang on every word you say, every gesture, every slight act of kindness, looking for an indication that shows your commitment or desire for me!" But I simply said "Nope, not bored!" These guys were/are attracted to us for some reason. It is a mystery to me at times, but they also may feel inadequate and insecure at our wishes and future plans. At 30 years old, they are just beginning to discover who they are, and we are just.... well, we are seasoned, and confident in ourselves, comfortable in our own skin. We may have relationship hurts, but we are mostly pretty realistic and happy with who we are because of what we have experienced through life. It's intimidating for them too. So, don't think you are the only one who has the Big Question Mark going on in your head, the guy probably does too!!! I just wish they would realize that we don't always have it together, especially with matters of the heart, and we still cry, we still feel, we still love, and we are still "girls" not just "women." I'm glad you contacted him, BigCat. Not having that connection was torture.

@BigCat... Good, you put yourself out of your misery. Play it by ear on the 5th or the meeting beforehand, see how it pans out.

@Shopgirl.Wise word words! 

Now, the latest from me, I'm typing a few words to you GIRLS( well, we are!) and id**t Indian is on Viber with an answer to something I asked him. I asked where is he now, he replied its so remote he had to google it, then there now he says it's the Capital. WTF.

pyou really don't want to see the choice reply I made, you see unlike you understanding ladies, I'm a b***h! I take no sh*t. My messages keep him sane, well, I will ignore him now for a day or so. Thinking he can insult my intellengce!!!

@Shopgirl Thank you for your insight. Very encouraging :) It has occurred to me he might think I am not interested.  i think he thinks I see other people because I am still active on the site we met on.  I have deliberately stayed off it for days now though. He still goes on there too but says he is going to leave.

@Marcella25 Thank you for your support and the idea to contact him.  I am seeing him tomorrow :D

I think if he is still upset about his ex I should just be a supportive friend to him now and not hope for anything else.  I do sense he is sad underneath.  As long as I can see him I am happy though.  I get nice hugs which is something :)

What is Viper?