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My boyfriend/ currently my ex is bipolar. We've been i guess you could say on and off for 6 months. the first time we got together, we were together for 3 months. then he said that he lost feelings for me. we didn't talk for about 2 weeks and one day he told me that he made a mistake and it will never happen again and he wants me back. everything was starting to get a lot better and we were doing great. then another 3 months passed and he did it again. im not really sure what to do or if this is gonna keep happening but i keep putting up with this because hes someone who i care about very much and im not willing to just give up. im also wondering if its normal that bipolar people do things like this. 

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First of all sweetie realize it isn't your fault. This is his bi-polar talking, he cannot control or help it. Remember that secondly, even though he has bi-polar and doesn't necessarily mean anything by it, it is a lot to put yourself through. 

You have to talk to him, tell him he cannot keep doing this because this hurts you and you love him and you want to be with him but him leaving you every 3 months is not fair. You deserve someone who loves you, who doesn't leave you and although its not his fault , he still has to choose, tell him he has to choose wither he wants to really be here with you or not and that if he chooses you then he has to be there no more leaving every 3 months because its no fair.

i know it hard but sweetie the best you can do it talk to him. i hope this helps good luck, let us know how it goes. 
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thanks for the really great advice!
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siara11411 wrote:

thanks for the really great advice!


it is so nice to know there are other women goin through the same common expeariances with a bi polar boyfriend .. I hav recentley been goin through the same thing ,, I want to be alone , I want to be by my- self , leave me alone ... Oh trust me I know ... it is so hurtful,, its like the best honey moon ride of your life and then they take it away in a split second the next day .... I hav been tryin to rack my brain , because i am so in-love with this man ,, I know he is just tryin to push me away , but I wanna help ,, can we? I dont wanna giv up ,, he is tellin me to move on , and I know its not over ... he hasnt been nasty or rude ,, wich common break ups usually are ,, weall know that ,,,.... There was no sign of anything wrong , and then it hit me like a ton of bricks ,, my heart hurts so deeply and he claims he is just a loss soul.. the same question appears on so many of our logs,,, i will be there for him, help him and not walk away ,, !!! I am soo hurt and down because this guy is amazing too, so wonderful, and he was great with my kids... I want him back , but only time will tell!!!

sincerley
I understand
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Yes, i believe mind changes and mood swings are totally normal. Is he on medication? men are trickly like this, my boyfriend doesnt have bipolar but when he gets angry, he wants to break up, its just a sign of weakness and thats the male speies so i learnt to ignore the break up in anger issues he faces because when he is not moody we have amazing days together and alot of laughs.
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I can relate to all of this.  My boyfriend broke up with me every two months, saying how in love he is and then he isn't in love with me anymore.  one minute he is the most amazing person i know the next hes distant.  I wish I had someone to talk to that knows what im going trhough.  I have no one else who would understand.
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Stillinlost, and all the above, I can totally relate to all your stories. I am currently going through the same, my boyfriend (now ex) has suffered from depression for years as much as I want to be there for him and support him I am slowly losing myself in the process. Alot of hurtful things have been said that I cant forget. The last time I had any contact with him was 6 weeks ago when out of the blue over night he changed and wanted out...saying i 'deserve better and he cant be there for me right now'


I was with him for 3 years, we used to have breaks every 3 months,,,,I dont know why I put up with this but I love this person so much, he is the most kind generous person when he is not depressed.
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No he isnt on medication which it would probably nake a difference
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i can relate to that
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I'm curious about what's happened. My boyfriend (ex, right now) is doing the same thing. He broke up with me again yesterday, and I'm wondering if he'll do what he did last time and come back after a month.
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We're all going thru the same thing Siraa with our partners.My gf has broke it off with me 4 times in 8 months but am still sticking it out.I truly believe in prayer though.Its the only thing.And for God's sake make sure u have a life outside him with lots of male socialising too but not dating obviously if u still love him.I do believe that everyone in these relationships is carrying a third partner in the relationship and he's called bi polar.He has to be dealt with first.And actually its recommended that both partners in a bi polar relationship have therapy.
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So, so glad I found this link.  I've been going out of my mind this past week.  We had been very close years ago - always thought about each other and then finally were able to get together a year ago.  Things were going great - feeling so close and loved then BAM within a like 2 hour time frame went from comforting me and hugging me after a bad day to I'm no good for you we are breaking up & that's that.  I've been so devestated I haven't ate in a week - haven't worked in a week - just been sobbing my eyes out.  He's seen me a few times & texted some.  So is there a chance for us to get back together or ? ... I have never ever been this confused and hurt in my life.

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I guarentee u he will.They all do it.Except that with me when my bp gf breaks up it seems to take longer for her to come back everytime.Its six weeks now since we're broke up and she split with me 4 times.I think the only answer is though to support them in getting stable first before even considering a stable serious relationship.I dont think we're doing them or us any avours by just accepting their behaviour but be nice and caring to them.We are suffering I know but all the same I doubt Bi polar is an easy ride fir them either and they possibly arent aware thir behaviour is wrong.He's prolly back yo ya by now is he?
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Thank you, thank you, thank you for your reply Jimbob1982!! No he's not back with me but I've seen him for a little while almost every day. He's hugged me several times when I do see him and I get a short text or two every day. He goes to the doctor in a week and will be getting another med change. He still thinks he's doing the "right thing" by me by breaking up. Though I feel like my heart just got stomped on. I'm praying new meds brings a new change of thought & that we'll be back together. I know exactly what you mean - it's a hard ride for both and I've had many people tell me to move on but I wouldn't want to give up on him either if he had any other disease. I love him...
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Woohoo mine just got back to me today too aftr leavin her alone for a month.And I can guarentee its the prayers that help us to do the right thing.Im just so delighted that shes not afraid to tak to me and that shes okay.Hopefully we will learn to deal with this bi polar and have a loving relationship someday when both of us will be able to see each other as equals but I'll leave that in Gods hands.I know he wont lead us astray.
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