After I got out of therapy last week I was very mad. I felt that i should not have to go through this by myself. I very up set and had to go to the E.R. I finally made it home and I texted my father and asked him why did he molest me but I didn't get a answer back so I don't know if I should do it again or just let it be.
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Well he is probably feeling ashamed of himself. My sister was molested by an uncle when she was younger and I have seen how angry that it has made her. She has gotten over it for the most part but I would think it is something that you can never fully get over.
He probably won't text message you back because he is probably embarassed, ashamed and maybe he doesn't even know why he did it. Maybe you could try writing him a letter explaining how the molestation has affected you. Let him know that you need closure to move on and if he ever cared about you at all he will at least write you back to let you know why he did what he did.
There is only so much that you can do and you can not make him respond. To be completely honest you are probably better off without him in your life at this point. So maybe you could write the letter and try and get closure and if does not respond just be thankful that you don't have that in your life anymore. When people are ashamed of things that they have done in the past they tend to run away from the problem and you can't make someone take responsibility for their actions if they choose not to.
We also had allot of problems with my parents growing up (not molestation). They did allot of drugs, drank all the time and generally neglected us. I have 3 handicapped sisters due to drug abuse. I haven't really had an issue coping with the things in my past but my sister has. She has been to therapists and one of them recommended that she keep an "anger journal". Every time that she was feeling angry or resentful toward my parents she would write down exactly why and would go over the things that happened in the past and how those things affected her. After keeping that journal for a while she gave it to my parents and they cried when they read it. They have both been sober for over a year now. They didn't full comprehend everything they did until they read it from her perspective and could see the damage that they did. Maybe something like that would be helpful for you as well.
I hope that helps you. Just remember that there allot of people out there who have had to suffer through this sort of thing that can relate to your experience. Good luck to you!
He probably won't text message you back because he is probably embarassed, ashamed and maybe he doesn't even know why he did it. Maybe you could try writing him a letter explaining how the molestation has affected you. Let him know that you need closure to move on and if he ever cared about you at all he will at least write you back to let you know why he did what he did.
There is only so much that you can do and you can not make him respond. To be completely honest you are probably better off without him in your life at this point. So maybe you could write the letter and try and get closure and if does not respond just be thankful that you don't have that in your life anymore. When people are ashamed of things that they have done in the past they tend to run away from the problem and you can't make someone take responsibility for their actions if they choose not to.
We also had allot of problems with my parents growing up (not molestation). They did allot of drugs, drank all the time and generally neglected us. I have 3 handicapped sisters due to drug abuse. I haven't really had an issue coping with the things in my past but my sister has. She has been to therapists and one of them recommended that she keep an "anger journal". Every time that she was feeling angry or resentful toward my parents she would write down exactly why and would go over the things that happened in the past and how those things affected her. After keeping that journal for a while she gave it to my parents and they cried when they read it. They have both been sober for over a year now. They didn't full comprehend everything they did until they read it from her perspective and could see the damage that they did. Maybe something like that would be helpful for you as well.
I hope that helps you. Just remember that there allot of people out there who have had to suffer through this sort of thing that can relate to your experience. Good luck to you!
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I suppose texting him a question like that is a bad idea, as you have had to know that he would not respond. I feel for you but what did you expect him to say? There is no right answer here, and no matter what reason he had would be the wrong one anyway.
My step dad crept into my room when i was 13 and decided to touch my breasts, he thought i was sleeping, but i wasn't. He couldn't even look in my face the next day. I didn't tell my mother because i had the same thing happen with 2 of her old boyfriends in the past and she called me a liar then, so what would be the difference now?
Your father is a creep, i'm sorry to say that. I'm guessing that he does not live with you.
Ya know what, just let it be for now. The fact that he knows somethings up is a small punishment that he has to think about all the time.
It is not to late to have your father legally punished. Things like this have come to light several years after the fact. Your counselor may even suggest this option to you. Just so you know if you do persue this, it's a long and drawn out process, and it's painful to have to re live your nightmare in front of your family and several strangers.
My step dad crept into my room when i was 13 and decided to touch my breasts, he thought i was sleeping, but i wasn't. He couldn't even look in my face the next day. I didn't tell my mother because i had the same thing happen with 2 of her old boyfriends in the past and she called me a liar then, so what would be the difference now?
Your father is a creep, i'm sorry to say that. I'm guessing that he does not live with you.
Ya know what, just let it be for now. The fact that he knows somethings up is a small punishment that he has to think about all the time.
It is not to late to have your father legally punished. Things like this have come to light several years after the fact. Your counselor may even suggest this option to you. Just so you know if you do persue this, it's a long and drawn out process, and it's painful to have to re live your nightmare in front of your family and several strangers.
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hun i am so sorry to hear that happened to you. :cry: you should keep asking him. demand to know why he molested you. demand why he wanted to scar and scare you like that. and how old were you when that happened.
please send me a message instead. i have a hard time finding each topic over and over again.
get a pen or pencil and paper. my screen name is
iloveyu<3
thats it.
please send me a message instead. i have a hard time finding each topic over and over again.
get a pen or pencil and paper. my screen name is
iloveyu<3
thats it.
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Hi Renetta: I feel bad that you are still in such a bad place with what he did! I have a different spin on why he didn't answer you - than the other posters - is that IF he texted you back and explained why he sexually molested you, then it is EVIDENCE!!!!!!!! He is a sneaky you know what, and as you have been worried about others including your little sister, then he is TOTALLY aware of the law and probably doesn't want ANY proof of his deviance!!!! IF he was to text you and tell you why, he could no longer state that you are "crazy, imagining things, depressed etc" right?!
All you have to know is that he is a deviant! And you know what I feel that you should do about him - press charges! I truly feel that this would help you in your healing AND might just save your younger sister and perhaps her mother! Because when he is a compulsive abuser, it's not just once that he's done it - because he got away with it right? I know this would be a LOT for you to do, but you do need closure with him. Also Renetta, a REAL FATHER - DAD - PA etc. would NEVER EVER EVER do that to their child. He is just slime on the bottom of your shoes! I know you feel that he is your dad but he isn't! He is a weak monster who picked on the most vunerable of the family! And he knows you could blow his life apart and bring out the deviance. Also I wonder if he hasn't molested aquaintences or friends of yours. And they never told you, I was molested by 3 fathers of friends of mine. I was HORRIFIED but I loved my friends - who are sill my friends to this day - and will NEVER EVER tell them what their fathers did. BUT IF they ever came forward and said that their dads actually molested them then I would!!! Like I said before it is up to you! I am worried about you hon!
Lots of love and health to you!
All you have to know is that he is a deviant! And you know what I feel that you should do about him - press charges! I truly feel that this would help you in your healing AND might just save your younger sister and perhaps her mother! Because when he is a compulsive abuser, it's not just once that he's done it - because he got away with it right? I know this would be a LOT for you to do, but you do need closure with him. Also Renetta, a REAL FATHER - DAD - PA etc. would NEVER EVER EVER do that to their child. He is just slime on the bottom of your shoes! I know you feel that he is your dad but he isn't! He is a weak monster who picked on the most vunerable of the family! And he knows you could blow his life apart and bring out the deviance. Also I wonder if he hasn't molested aquaintences or friends of yours. And they never told you, I was molested by 3 fathers of friends of mine. I was HORRIFIED but I loved my friends - who are sill my friends to this day - and will NEVER EVER tell them what their fathers did. BUT IF they ever came forward and said that their dads actually molested them then I would!!! Like I said before it is up to you! I am worried about you hon!
Lots of love and health to you!
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Hi Renetta: How have you been doing! I think about you a lot!!! There was a story on Oprah yesterday (similar to what you went through) and I though about you! Just seeing how things are going!
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I'm not sure what answer you wanted. But the answer is because he was turned on and needed to cum. You were there so he used your p***y. Would you feel better if he responded with that?
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