what age?

The best thing you can do is just wait. Do not be pressured into anything. When you are ready you will know it. You want to wait for the right guy, just not give it up to something who doesnt deserve it, so best bet is to wait and tell the people that are pressuring you to just back off!

I agree. You'll know when it's right for you because it will feel like something that you want to do, not something you are feeling pressured to do. The fact that you are feeling the pressure means you are not ready. If the desire to have sex comes from within you, you won't feel the pressure, and your own desire is the only good reason for having sex.

I grew up in the 60s, during the sexual revolution, and I never thought I'd have to be explaining this to a girl in 2007, but sex is a wonderful gift. It's here to be enjoyed when two people love, trust and respect each other. If only one person wants it, and puts pressure on another person to satisfy their desires, that's not love, that's exploitation, and exploitation turns sex into something ugly that it was never meant to be.

I'm sure you've probably read some of the great, classic love poetry by women like Elizabeth Barrett Browning and Emily Dickinson. Think about what those women were feeling when they wrote those lines. When you feel something like that, then you'll know you are ready.

I'm not saying you need to wait until you're sure you've found "the one." You can never really be sure about that; life holds no guarantees, and you have to kiss a lot of frogs before you find a prince. All I'm saying is to wait until you're sure that the desire to have sex with someone comes from inside you, not from some guy trying to manipulate you.

Once again, Upton, you've said it..


Don't be pressured to give up your virginity! As a female, to a female.. It's something you only have to give once!

I'm not saying, wait until marriage... But make sure that the guy who you do give it up too, is worth it. Make sure you have feelings for him.. You trust him, and that the moment is right! (And remember safe sex, is sexy!) People who pressure you into sex, is no one you would want to give your gift of virginity too...

Take a deep breath, close your eyes, and let it out. Relax. Don't let the penis-heads who are pressuring you, get to you. They're just turned on guys.. (No offense to all those men out there!) My advice, is enjoy being young. You're only 14! You've just started high school, or are about too! Sex is a big responsibility to take care off. Shove off the guys, and enjoy life for what's it's got. Wait a little bit to take on the responsibility of sex, when you are more mature, and your body is more well developed.

VirginGirly wrote:

Once again, Upton, you've said it..

Thanks. You know what's ironic? By the time you really get to understand women, you're too old for most of them to think you're sexy anymore. :?

Aw! Not true! xP Being sexy is all about believing in yourself. If you are confident, and believe you're sexy, it'll show, and you'll be sexy. Age, Psh. What does that have to do with sex? Older men know what they are doing, and don't make things just about lust, and awkward sex.. xD! They know what to do the next morning, besides say 'Er.. yea.. I'll.. I'll call you ok?' xP

Thanks again, and everything you say is true, but I guess I'm just adjusting to the fact that I can't get get the kind of girls into bed that I used to. I've been very lucky in that I've always looked very young for my age, but I've gotten to the point where looking 10-15 years younger isn't enough for those 20-something babes. I'm still very confident, but I have to face reality.

I work with a young girl now who is just absolutely stunning. She's just about the most desirable woman I've ever seen, but while she has gotten very comfortable with me and we can talk about anything, I think she sees me as a kind of fatherly figure, even though I've basically told her I'd jump in bed with her anytime she asked. She came in one day complaining about how guys are always making passes at her, and I told her the only difference between me and those guys is that I know it isn't going to happen, so I'm not going to bother asking. She got a big laugh out of that, but I'm sure she understands that I think she's totally hot, but she also knows I'd never try anything unless she gave me the green light, and she just doesn't think of me in that way.

Of course, I'm delighted to be friends with her. She's sweet, beautiful, very intelligent, and she's been a big help to me. She also has a dirty mind and a great sense of humor, so we get along great, but I used to be able to get into bed with girls like her, and I think those days are over now. :'( Lots of great memories though! ;-)

Aw! That's great to hear sweetie! For as much as I'd adore.. going on with this conversation, I do believe we've got a little bit.. Off topic. Hehe. Although, if you wanted, I wouldn't mind chatting to someone like you on e-mail, or a messenger of the sorts.

I'm sure I'd enjoy that, but it looks like they've disabled any mechanisms for contacting people privately. I tried activating my e-mail address, but I can't see it, can you?

I'd be able to contact people if I accepted their invitation to join support, but I don't know if I want to do that yet, and I wouldn't do it just so I could contact someone. That wouldn't be ethical.

So I guess we'll just have to continue to enjoy each others' posts for now, and I'll try not to hijack any more threads. ;-)

But uh.. Back on topic.


You're too young sweetie, enjoy your life while it's young. Sex can really screw things up.. Rumors, I know. I've been there. Just shrug those boys off, and go have some fun hanging with your girls! ;D


**edited by moderator**