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I'm a 18 year old male. 

Background:
In sophomore year of high school i started smoking weed. I had so many good times with friends and new people. I used to think weed was the best thing ever and EVERY weekend i looked forward to it. Even when i started, I always felt like i had weird or paranoid thoughts on weed. I would have thoughts and visions one would expect someone on shrooms to have, stuff like thinking my friends were aliens or something like that. I think my head wanted me to feel higher than i was. Anyways, For 2 years things were great, I had nervous breakdowns while smoking, but nothing that ever changed my state of mind.

The Beginning: 
Summer of 2011 was great at the beginning, i smoked with friends and played videos games pretty much lol. Towards the end, however, i had a series of unfortunate events. One time me and my friend and his friend went back to his house high and his parents were just leaving. They started talking with us and i could tell from the very start my voice was different and i wasn't acting normal. After my friends parents left, the other kid we were with laughed at me, gave me weird looks, and shook his head. I asked my friend what was wrong and he shook his head too. That day was one of the worst of my life. I left my friends house early and was depressed for a week, thinking that i was some weirdo or something.
Well, a few weeks went on and school was about to start. I decided to smoke with some kid i kinda knew and just met. When we were smoking some of his other friends showed up and took us back to this mud path for trucks. There was about 15 other people back there, all smoking. We go out of the truck, hung out, and smoked. After a few hits i became so dizzy to the point were i had to sit down or i would pass out. I didnt eat that morning and i believe thats what caused it. Everyone was like "wtf is he doing"? and all starred at me while i sat there on the ground, practically sweating from embarrassing. I was having a bad trip and i couldn't do anything about it. 15 minutes later, the kids friends got back in their truck and started mudding. They drove in circles and came close to me a few times, getting mud on my legs. It took me 5 minutes to realize they were doing it on purpose. I was so high i didn't even notice the 15 other people standing there watching me get humiliated. I said goodbye to my friend and rode my bike home. That was the worst day of my life.

School:
2 weeks after that horrible day, school started. Since that bad day, i didnt really have any signs of anxiety or social problems so i went to school as if it was a normal day. The first class i walk into and instantly, i feel like every kid in the room is starting at me. I feel awkward, and as if im drawing attention with every little move i make. When people try to talk to me, i reply in quiet, mumbling words. Every class is the same way and i avoid talking to anyone i can. This goes on for months. 

Currently:
Its 8 months later and im still dealing with every day social problems. I'm quiet in class, i have a hard time talking to people without getting light headed or nervous, and i feel like everyone in the classroom is watching me the whole period. I have weird thoughts at night and if i dont get good enough sleep, im "extra" nervous the next day. And all of this with 8 months of not smoking weed.

If ANYONE has any idea what might be wrong with my head, please explain. I'm almost to the point of telling my parents everything and getting professional help but that would be a last resort.

I know this is a long story but i appreciate any help. I just dont know what to do anymore. 

Thanks

-Nick

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Marijuana, although labeled as a "harmless" herb by many, is a catalyst for many mental illnesses. They are actually just now starting to discover all of its shocking negative outcomes after prolonged use.


I say this because I was a user in high school myself and I experienced the paranoia and anxiety that all comes with it. I remember one day I smoked so much and ended up passing out. It was hilariously fun and me and my buddies had a great time, however, the next day I was getting on the local train station and I was sitting down at a cafe. (I was sober) A man who was asking people for change (and I clearly saw him asking people for change) started walking towards me. Now a normal person would assume that this man was going to ask them for change, as he was doing to others. However, paranoia randomly kicked in and I began to contemplate that this man was a criminal who knew me and wanted to jump me.


Looking back at it it is ridiculous, but I have never been a much paranoid person in my life and I know the weekend smoke session had a lot to do with it. I also have experienced panic type symptoms from Cannabis use during pure sobriety, weeks after even using it I would feel nervous and jittery, like I drank a pot of coffee. 


The fact of the matter is, you are still young and your brain will most likely heal (assuming you dont touch it ever again) but it is going to take a while. The brain is one of the worst organ's when it comes to repair and it is said that when THC creates a chemical imbalance within the brain (anxiety, paranoia, or whatever) assuming you are young enough and still developing it can take anywhere from 1.5-3 years for you to feel totally normal again. This may sound ridiculous because it is so long but I remember reading a study about it not too long ago, the brain is a very slow healing organ, but be glad your young and that you have the chance to revert to normal.


My tips to you: Continue to not smoke

                        Play sports and eat healthy/sleep well (they speed up the healing process enormously)


Good luck to you bro, I've been through it all man, believe me. I loved weed so much when I turned 18 I secretly got a medical card behind my parents back, I used to get baked every weekend until I started feeling its side effects and started researching weed. Despite what lots of people say, it is a far from harmless drug.

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Thank you so much, The fact that i might feel normal again makes me so happy. Im glad you had the same symptoms. It gives me a lot of hope seeing there are plenty more people out there having the same issues as me. Thank you for taking the time to reply.
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dude i totally feel you..i was in the same exact situation until i discovered weed isnt for everyone. so i stopped.it wasn't easy at all but with time, things were back to normal. i will suggest you work out alot. because it really helps..it clears your mind and releases endorphin. also hobbies will be good. i know its hard but try to stop thinking soo much. our thoughts determine our state of mind. i remember when i would get those thoughts i instantly pick up my basketball, go out and shoot some hoops..even if it was at mid-night..just so i can avoid the thoughts..i also have dumbbells in my room.i put on some music and work out..also do alot of reading on self-confidence and finding inner peace..reading those things is like having a personal coach/motivator, i read them daily..until they were embedded in my brain. also , dont feel too bad for yourself.. as cliche as it sounds, its really just in your head, so dont give in.fight it. if you do these things daily for about a month or two, things will be back to normal. its depends on how bad you want a change. it was so bad that i also almost told my parents and tried to get professional help.but i put myself in the mess and i will get myself out. i can now say i am very happy..i don't smoke anymore but only before sexual intercourse, thats if its okay with the girl. again, its really just your mind trying to get hold of you.don't let..learn to control your mind and thoughts not the other way around. 
best of luck to you...
u should read my post 
https://www.steadyhealth.com/Smoking_weed_has_changed_who_i_am__t273663.html?utm_source=steadyhealth&utm_medium=web&utm_campaign=relDiSimDiscussions&utm_source=steadyhealth&utm_medium=web&utm_campaign=top_related2
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dont smike Take a deep breath enjoy life Omg SOund like me a little but idrank for 20 yrs
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