My girlfriend of six years recently told me she had a sexual encounter with one of her old friends while visiting her parents out of state. She told me, her long time friend and herself performed oral sex on eachother in the shower. She also told me during her past visits out of state while visitng her parents she had similar experiences with this friend. Her friend has a boyfriend of serveral years and asked her friend and my girlfriend for a 3 some, which she says she turned down. When I probed for more details, she told me she and her friend had agreed if they were to have a 3 some or any sexual activity, they would do it together. She then told me that her and her friend had a 3 some half a year before we started dating. I don't feel threatened by her engaging in sexual acts with other women, with or without me. She has never done anything outside of kiss another girl around me. Her friend's boyfriend is promiscuous and does not practice safe sex. I'm concerned about a few things. I do not want to catch an STD from her escapades with her friend. I'm also afraid she could be manipulated or has been manipulated into a 3 some with these people. When I try to talk to her about that aspect, she gets angry. She assures me she hasn't cheated on me with another "man." She did cheat on me in the first few mths of our relationship, then later told me. How do I go about telling her I want her to get checked and how do I handle this whole situation. I asked why she hadn't told me about those past and then recenty past actions. She told me they were meaningless , unimportant and between her friend and herself and they had not told anyone. I like the fact she is bi curious or bi sexual and that she came clean and told me about it all, however I feel distrust as though I'm not getting the whole story. I'd like her to get check before I have sex with her again, I'm unsure how to tell her. I need advice on the whole situation.
HiBcurb, you don't need to be a rocket scientist here. No STD check, no sex. If she can't deal with that, move on. It's cool that you are open and comfortable with her bisexuality, but you have to draw the line someplace.
Certain STD's are deadly and can not be taken back. You are well within your rights to command that she be checked out. This is your life and your health and in todays day and age there is no limit on safety.
Remember when you sleep with her, you are sleeping with her previous partners as well. Please don't let this one slide, it is serious and if she can't see it your way then you need to bounce, period.
In the meantime, make yourself an appointment and get yourself tested, have an HIV test while your at it.
Good luck and please do the right thing, you could be saving your own life.
Certain STD's are deadly and can not be taken back. You are well within your rights to command that she be checked out. This is your life and your health and in todays day and age there is no limit on safety.
Remember when you sleep with her, you are sleeping with her previous partners as well. Please don't let this one slide, it is serious and if she can't see it your way then you need to bounce, period.
In the meantime, make yourself an appointment and get yourself tested, have an HIV test while your at it.
Good luck and please do the right thing, you could be saving your own life.
When she told me of her escapades, I scheduled a STD test and received negative results 4 days ago. I was tested for HIV, chlamydia, gonorrhoea, syphilis, hepatitis, herpes, and genital warts. I have not had sex with her since. The situation is more complicated as we have a child together.
Oh damn Bcurb, didn't know bout the baby. Yes this does complicate the situation, big time. First things first, you have been deemed "clean" yes? I know this is not what you want to hear but i think you really need to be the one in control. Do you two live together? If so, demand that she get the job done or you will move out and possibly get custody, as she is a bit promiscuous.
How sad for you and this child. 6 years is a long time and there is so much history and a baby to boot.
The ball is in your court with this one. I personally couldn't do it at all, period. Male, female, dog, cat it wouldn't matter. You step out on me and it's done. Tho it is arousing that she is bi, it's still cheating, i would have to say "see ya"
That's just me tho.
How sad for you and this child. 6 years is a long time and there is so much history and a baby to boot.
The ball is in your court with this one. I personally couldn't do it at all, period. Male, female, dog, cat it wouldn't matter. You step out on me and it's done. Tho it is arousing that she is bi, it's still cheating, i would have to say "see ya"
That's just me tho.