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Hi i have a husband that i feel just gets off on blaming me for what ever is upsetting him for any particular reason at , he swears and yells at me and still will keep on about the issue 4 days after including maybe another 5 issues on top.it could be from why is the pot plant moved over there? or who ate the Cheese slices? what did you do today if you didnt go to work?or your've just eaten or maybe you never got any money? bla bla bla. The only time he is happy if im satisfing him sexually. then it will start again. every morning he is unpredicatable and i never know what mood he is in, i have a 17 year old who moved out because of him abusing him verbally as well, non of my girlfriends come around to see me as he is always swearing and has a bottle of beer in his hand sober or drunk, he does work hard as a roofer, i give him credit for. im just tired but dont have the strength to make a decisiion to tell him i dont love him anymore and i want to be on my own.

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You've got to try and get the strength together to tell him the truth.

Communication is key in a relationship, and no topic should be a bad topic if the communication is healthy between you two.
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He doesn't sound like the kind of guy who would sit down and have a nice chat with you. He sounds like he's got some serious control problems. Many guys with this problem will b***h from sun up to sundown because it makes them feel like a manly man, but we look at them like they a** holes. Little does he know that his chronic complaining is slowly chipping away at you and your relationship.
If you choose to stay in this mess, that is your decision. Take him aside and put it out there. Look, if you don't stop....whatever it is he's doing, then i will consider a seperation. Period. No dancing, no crying, no nothing, just plain put it in his face. It is sad when a husband or father or a step father drives the teenager out of the house. I went thru the same thing with my second husband.
This is your life and your future. If you think you can handle this for the rest of time, so be it. Don't bring it up to him while he is drinking, his reaction could become physical. Don't approach it with your guns drawn either as his defenses will kick in to overdrive. Just get him at his best, whenever you think that is and tell him.
On the other side of this, if you don't love him and you are sure about that and you want to be on your own, tell him exactly that. Sometimes it's to late to save a relationship especially if one of the players has fallen out of love.
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That sounds like me from 3 years ago, minus being drunk and the sex. What worked for me was when I was in one of my calm moods my mum would talk to me about my issues, I instantly realised there was a problem and eventually started seeing myself when I was in a state. My problem was I couldn't tell the difference between nice me and mean me, it may be the same for your husband. I assume he loves you very much and hopefully if you talk to him during a peaceful moment he'll listen a least a little. If he doesn't listen at all then speak his language, be nice or no sex.
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