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I have been with my boyfriend for 15 months and we have recently moved in together. We rarely have sex and when we do it's usually because he has had a drink or is drunk. We have good adventurous sex which we both enjoy. However I have never been able to climax just through intercourse but can by touching and him going down on me. This has aleays been the ase with privious partners. This I know bothers him. We hadn't had sex for nearly six weeks so I decided to talk to him about it and he said he finds it hard to have the desire to want sex with me and sees me as a friend and isn't sure if he fancies me like he used too. He said he loves me and dosnt want to lose me and that we will get through this and he will work on his issues! I suggested counciling which he said he would think about. I don't understand how someone would want to stay in a relationship if u didnt cancy them. I have adked him if he fancies other girls and he said no, i know he masterbates now and then. But finds sleeping with strangers and having one night stands more exciting then sleeping with me now. He was a confirmed bachelor and has never been in a serious relationship like this before so I know he finds it hard sometimes. I however have always been in relationships and long term ones too. I'm 29 and he is 33. Please can someone help me understand how he is feeling and advise on how to help him see me as a sexual person again. Xxx

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hi taylor well i dont know if this will help yuhh but im 16 and had the same situation a fuew weeks ago im very young so this might be teenage hormons but what i did with my boy friend was after i had my baby he moved in and we didnt have sex up to 5 weeks i said i want sex with yuh ands he said the esact same "i only see yuh as a friend " i was like dude yuh are my boyfriend yuhh live with me and yuh had a kid with me any ways a fuew days past on and my friend said why dont yuh try this so what ii did was dress in little cute slutty out fuits every hr or so and just kiss him softly on the cheack and just do little cute thhjings to him like when i walked past i would slid my hand across his waist and then i noticed he started to get more into it and then he was back :) to the sexuale guy he wwas

 

so maby yuh could try what i did and he might come back hee probz just needs a little ompf :)

 

hope i helped Tasha xx

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I know this is probably not what you want to hear, but it sounds like this relationship has deteriorated.  Neither of you sounds happy at this point.  You want more commitment which he no longer wants to provide.  He seems to feel like he wants to be single again.

I think at this point, you need to seriously consider whether or not this relationship is right for you anymore.  You deserve to be in a relationship in which the man is interested.  If he no longer has feelings for you, it's wasting the time of both of you and only causing pain.

Have a serious talk with him.  Ask him if he wants to move on.  Tell him you need a serious answer because the longer the relationship drags on where it's not healthy, the more hurt the two of you will be.  Therefore, ask him to seriously think about what it is he wants.

I'm so sorry you're having this problem.  I wish you the best of luck!
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