My period is due and I have noticed a few lumps around my oxter and in my armpit which are all tender- my arm feels heavy and sore to lift. After reading up on lymph nodes and how these work, I am scared as to what this could be! Should I be worried and should I check this out, or am I just in a bit of a panic.
further to this, my toenails have started to fall away. o.O I am worried!
further to this, my toenails have started to fall away. o.O I am worried!
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I am angry as I am a woman. i am so upset at how swolen everything is and everything feels so tender. i just feel really very uncomfy and agitiated. Lump in oxter( has not gone down and my toe is sore and I just want to cry. I cant stop worrying about it now- its not helping my allready messed up head that no one seems to understand.
huh- must admit though, I got so anxious and consumed by my panic when cleaning windows at work. i gave up and refused to do it-claiming I could not get the grot of the windown ( which was not a lie either) Just fed up...then I add everything up in my head and I reckon that ive abused my body as I have probably had GAD all my life, and have done and will continue to suffer from ptsd due to events from the past which make me seem somewhat bipolar( actualli think thats what I am ) but no one seems to be in agreement, just my sister, dad, partner, boss even my cat.
id quite happily cut these things off myself- grrr- I hate boobs!!!!!!
Spent pretty much most of today holding sore arm, and then getting so furious with life, with the fact |I have to walk everywhere and will never be able to drive( thank god) and then just with everything. So mad and wanted to crumple up a car...the enjoyment that would give just to smash in a few cars. As Ive been taught that this behaviour would be naughty and could possibly lead to a huge fine or prison sentence ( mind you that would not be anyd different from how I fel right now, living here) that I probably will not do anything with my anger and Ill end up drinking it away- or something/. Should have put this post under anxiety. Must go, lump in armpit is depressing me
huh- must admit though, I got so anxious and consumed by my panic when cleaning windows at work. i gave up and refused to do it-claiming I could not get the grot of the windown ( which was not a lie either) Just fed up...then I add everything up in my head and I reckon that ive abused my body as I have probably had GAD all my life, and have done and will continue to suffer from ptsd due to events from the past which make me seem somewhat bipolar( actualli think thats what I am ) but no one seems to be in agreement, just my sister, dad, partner, boss even my cat.
id quite happily cut these things off myself- grrr- I hate boobs!!!!!!
Spent pretty much most of today holding sore arm, and then getting so furious with life, with the fact |I have to walk everywhere and will never be able to drive( thank god) and then just with everything. So mad and wanted to crumple up a car...the enjoyment that would give just to smash in a few cars. As Ive been taught that this behaviour would be naughty and could possibly lead to a huge fine or prison sentence ( mind you that would not be anyd different from how I fel right now, living here) that I probably will not do anything with my anger and Ill end up drinking it away- or something/. Should have put this post under anxiety. Must go, lump in armpit is depressing me
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Gosh yeah- I wonder what that was. Not had that pain in a while- thankfully!!!! I feel a bit mad today, and almost as if I am bacl at square one. Am I going to be like this for the res of my life- oh-lets face it probably.
yesterday( okay last night I felt good about stuff and spent a fiar bit of time thinking how much I actually really think life can be great and regretting how I seem to live in this doom state. This is the hard thing for me, and for those that are not as ( whatever) as me, I cant seem to control it. Today for instance started the blob,, and really want to eat my tongue so I dont have to communicate- now I know thats a symptom of pMt, but I cant explain these feelings of wanting to hide away. Its as though I want to hide so I want hurt anyone, and I want hurt me, Does anyone else understand this? i think I am going crazy!!!!
I also want to coment on how difficult it can be to get back on track, as there is regret attached to the time waisted for feeling like I do right at this moment. Oh so confused.
partner has been great lately.What made me change my opinion? What was it( oh I remeber now) But Och its too complicated, I dont want to go there -dont want to think about it. I know I avoid things but maybe I am guilty of being a selfish b, and of being I dont know, ( orrational).So confused.
The theyll be questions at work , Theres been times ( worse in my previous job) where I could not contorl my emotions and I would cry like a pure 2yr old, almost like a 2yr olds tantrum in a spper market. Cant control my emotion
yesterday( okay last night I felt good about stuff and spent a fiar bit of time thinking how much I actually really think life can be great and regretting how I seem to live in this doom state. This is the hard thing for me, and for those that are not as ( whatever) as me, I cant seem to control it. Today for instance started the blob,, and really want to eat my tongue so I dont have to communicate- now I know thats a symptom of pMt, but I cant explain these feelings of wanting to hide away. Its as though I want to hide so I want hurt anyone, and I want hurt me, Does anyone else understand this? i think I am going crazy!!!!
I also want to coment on how difficult it can be to get back on track, as there is regret attached to the time waisted for feeling like I do right at this moment. Oh so confused.
partner has been great lately.What made me change my opinion? What was it( oh I remeber now) But Och its too complicated, I dont want to go there -dont want to think about it. I know I avoid things but maybe I am guilty of being a selfish b, and of being I dont know, ( orrational).So confused.
The theyll be questions at work , Theres been times ( worse in my previous job) where I could not contorl my emotions and I would cry like a pure 2yr old, almost like a 2yr olds tantrum in a spper market. Cant control my emotion
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