Hey guys, first some quick information about me: I am male, 20 years old, heterosexual. Now to my problem: I don't get aroused by vaginas. But I have a fetish - do not necessarily want to go into details here. When I have sex with my girlfriend, it usually works this way: she turns me on with her fetish and makes my penis hard, then I go inside her and we have sex. But when my penis is inside her, he usually gets soft and I don't feel anything really. It is still fun and I make her cum, but of course I would like to have real sex and not cum later when we do the fetish thing. Did anyone ever have experienced something similar? Would you recommed me seeing a psychologist? I was wondering about trying to get rid of my fetish, but it seems to me unclear if I then will be aroused by vaginas. I am aroused by boobs by the way. I would really appreciate to hear some thoughts, what do you guys think?
HI ! You don't give enough details on the fetish of your partner.
You may feel nothing for her fetish, but this is everything to her. In fact I gather that she loves you a lot because you are accepting of her. It would be good to save the relationship and that could work out some sort of compromise.
Now you may need to understand that her fetish is part of her personality and that it is linked to her sexuality. In a woman it is a very complex issue because her sexuality will go through all kinds of highs and lows. In low times the fetish is weak, while in high times she adores it.
The question you need to clear up is "how is she to you otherwise?" Is her fetish a consuming thing to her? In this case she needs some professional help to bring it down to size in your relationship. If it is occasional, then play with her and joke about it.