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Well i am 16 and lost my virginity. It was with my boyfriend that ive been with for 1 1/2 years now. He is one of those who LOVES writing love notes to me and he puts in some other things talking about our sex life. My mom found one of those notes and thats how she found out. she is mad at me. I understand and all. But she is saying that i am easy and my boyfriend only wants me for sex.. I was hurt that she is mad at me. Im not mad at my self for having sex but for not telling her about it sooner but she always over reacts to eveything . my older brother lost his at 17 and she was happy and talking good about him but she is calling me a w**** and easy. Any advice?


Hi Kiki,

It's the old double standard.  Guys get applauded for losing their virginity and the girls a *lut.  No.  It is NOT fair.

Explain to your mother that you've been with your boyfriend for more than 1 1/2 years.  That he does love you and that it's not just about him wanting sex.

I can see her point, but it's not like you just met the guy. 

Kiki, it all boils down to is that your mother loves you and wants the best for you.  She's afraid you made a mistake.  Talk to her about birth control - even if you don't want to, bring the subject up with her.  She's very likely afraid that you'll end up pregnant early on, not finish school, or go to college.

She still loves you, all mothers will.  It's not really mad either more of a disappointment.  You'll understand as you get older.

Hope it helps.