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I lost my virginity at fourteen. I was inexperienced with boys. I hadnt kissed one 'properly' and I was curious. So when I got drunk with friends for the first time and I ended up in a bed with a boy that I've had an on and off relationship with since the start of high school one thing led to another. It lasted about a minute or two I was ridiculously drunk and he was sober. I can't remember much of it except the fact that we'd done it and it was the biggest mistake of my life. I'd always fantasized about losing it at sixteen or older to someone I was head over in heels in love with. Yet I lost my virginity to a boy I barely liked at such a young confusing age. I told myself at the time that I loved him so it was okay that I did and that if I were to lose it to anyone it would be him. I told my best friend all of this, she was shocked but supported me and hasn't told a soul. a couple months down the track I hadn't spoken to this boy about that night, which was when I started to realize how big of mistake I had made. I felt unwanted and disgusting and unworthy of anyone else. I couldn't tell my mum she would be so heart broken and shocked because we always had this honest and open relationship. then came along another boy. we started dating and he told me that he loved me, me being nearly fifteen thought that this was a happily ever after sort of thing. I already had sex, so i had given up on this being sixteen thing and I thought that well since I wasn't a virgin anymore it wouldnt matter if I did it again. I was alreadly not innocent and pure anymore. So I did it with this boy, numerous times. Protected of course. But oblivious to my parents. At this time about six months into our relationship I started feeling remorse about what I was doing and lying about. Before sex was introduced into my life I saw myself as an innocent genuine person. This hadn't changed for the people who were unaware of what I was now doing ( which was basically everyone except a few close close friends) but for me this made me feel worse about myself like I was living a lie. So I told my boyfriend at the time that I didn't want to have sex anymore because I wasn't ready and it was making me thoroughly depressed because I was lying about it to my parents. We did occasionally go against my word and have sex but very rarely but this made me more upset because it felt like i was lying to myself aswell as my parents. I started to blame everything on my boyfriend at the time and he broke up with me. this left me more depressed and shattered. I felt more unwanted and disgusting. I had noone to confide in. I hated myself but I couldn't bring myself to tell anyone why. I'd completely gone against my values by having sex with this boy. but while I was going against my values I told myself that I was going to marry this boy so it wouldn't matter. I was so stupid and foolish. I still hate myself. But it gets worse before it gets better. I then found another boy. He is two years older then me he barely looks it though. He isn't your typical teenage boy though. He's studying at university to become an engineer and is one of the most intelligent people I know. I met him 12 months ago. We've been dating for 10. Although I can say Im completely happy with my relationship with him now I can say that I'm more stupid then even I thought. Three months into our relationship we had sex a few times. Protected of course. Again I'd gone against my values and had completely ignored all the past mistakes I had made. I was still only fifteen then and I shouldn't of been doing this with my body. He at the time saw how distraught I was with the situation and how torn I was with my unaware parents and my own self. He already knew about my past sex life. So he told me that we would not have sex until I was mentally and legally ready too. 7 months later and we still haven't. After all that what I'm trying to put across is my battle within myself. I lost my virginity at 14, continually had sex while I was 15. All this with three different boys over a year and a half. I am now sixteen and slowly starting to decide whether I'm ready or not to with the boyfriend I'm with now. But I don't know how to think positively about it because I have so much negative emotions caught up with sex. I love this boy with my whole heart and soul, I know I'm a teenager and I've proven to be reckless but this boy is someone very special to me. So I guess you could say this is the perfect situation to lose my virginity to the boy I'm head over heals for. But it's not because I'm not a virgin anymore. I'm impure. I'm a liar and i hate myself. I'm not looking for pity. I'm looking for advice to help me decide what to do. Tell my parents about all the bad stuff in the past. don't tell them but be honest with them about my relationship with this boy now or just not have sex for a very long time! gah. I hate myself. Someone please help.

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It is really early to lose your virginity when you are that young. But that usually happens when you don't have anyone to talk to (I am not judging anyone, not your mom, your older sister for example..) I am just trying to tell you that you needed to speak to someone about this because someone older, with much more experience than you have, could explain to you what broken hymen and losing virginity actually means. You will be OK, but I think that now you do know where you made a mistake and what you should do, or what you shouldn't do. But that is now in your past and according to your experience and our advice you might be able to help someone who is in the same struggle like you are.  

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dont worry youll be ok
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You should talk to your mother or another female adult. You have done nothing wrong my girl. Saving yourself for the person whom you marry is an outdated idea. You will be better equiped to deal with sex in marriage because of your experiences. You really need to see a councillor who will help you feel better about yourself. Learn to love yourself because you have nothing to be ashamed of. Good luck Peter
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I'm 14, almost 15 and I lost my virginity to a boy I've been dating for 8 months, I'm very close to his family, and hes very close to mine. He respects me, and my first love. I don't regret it all but I've been really scared lately, I'm not on BC but we use a condom everytime, he always washes his hands before he puts the condom on, always pulls out to see if it's ripped, never cums in the condom while he's inside of me, and he always fills the condom up with water to check for holes. The last 3 times we had sex, we used spermicide condoms, so we felt even safer.. But the outcome is scaring me and I need help, the last time we had sex was April 19th, my periods irregular but in march I got it around the 26th but it was light, so I was expecting it to come around then in april, but I never got it... And it's now may 12th, and I'm only spotting lightly, and it's scaring me :( were so careful about everything, and we don't know what to do.. Please help me :(
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Hi there.... You will not believe me but my life sounds exactly the same my dear. I also lost my virginity at the age of 14 and its miserable. Looking at my sister who is 14 now who seems so young. To think that I y virginity on that young age... Yes you do feel guilty and sooo depressed because how can we just give in that quick at an age of 14 years old. I've told one friend before and her reaction was terrible. We have made mistakes in the past, but you know what. Why do we still have to live in the past? I haven't told my parents either and it made me feel so bad because we are such a happy and religious family. I will never tell them because your sexlife has got nothing to do with your parents. They don't tell you about their sexlife do they? So you shouldn't feel bad for not telling them. Yes what happened was wrong but we can't turn back the time now huNNy. Just know that you are NOT alone :)
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All that comes to mind is "Pregnancy test" and it's always safer to take pregnancy pills and use condoms and it would be nearly impossible to get pregnant! Good luck and best wishes. Remember, If he truly loves you, he wouldn't hesitate to stay with you if you were to have a baby<3
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i lost my virginity at 13,and the weird things is..i feel totally fine about it.theres not one part of me that feels regret,or sad or aything. im totally chill..hell,now im 14 and slept with 7 guys xD the first one i did,or maybe do love...im not really sure.but hey,you only live once,better make your mark on the world(: do what makes you happy! for people like me its weed,sex,and being rebellious as hell..i come and go as i please,im my own problem,i take care of myself(: for other maybe it is absinence,being drug free,and getting good grades.idk thats yor choice,but thats jus not me(: or my friends xD
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I lost mine at 14 as well. Instead of thinking of yourself as impure and lying, think as yourself as trying to be perfect in bed for the one you love.

because i will say, there is nothing better than that sexual chemistry that comes across... now that is ONCE and a lifetime to find that one person..
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I lost mine at fourteen too, but I don't regret it at all. I'd been with my boyfriend for just over eleven months at the time, and I finally felt ready. You just have to look at the positives I guess. :)
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I dont know your parents , but unless they are super cool I wouldn't talk to them. Idk thats just me. I would see a student counselor before I saw my parents. Also there are hotlines you can call.
I know this won't change how you feel but I'm gonna go ahead and throw my opinion into this. Calm down. You had sex early and yes I agree that was a mistake but it's only as big of a deal as you let it. Many girls your age never even think twice , whereas you are deeply concerned and placing limits on your current relationship. If you trust and deeply care for your boyfriend you shouldn't feel impure about sex with him. Sex is a beautiful thing , no matter how material rap music makes it seem. Another thing. You SHOULD lie to your parents about sex
( once again, these are only my
Opinions and have no knowledge of your parents , their rules , or your relationships ) either way, sex was never something I wanted to talk about with my parents. Hope this helps or at least makes you feel a little bit better.
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you appear to be very careful with your sex preparation. If what you have said is true you will not be pregnant . Buy a pregnancy testing kit from a pharmacy to put your mind at ease and then go to a doctor about your periods, You are very young to be having intercourse. Can I suggest you go in for more sex play (mutual masturbation) which will help you and your partner to enjoy the sex but without the worry. It may be that you dont achieve orgasm during intercourse so it would be nice for your partner to understand your needs rather than his.
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What a sad story you tell of yourself. You will no doubt get pregnant soon and with the drugs going on, give birth to a handicapped child that you will not be able to care for. By all means be your own person but dont hurt others in doing so. Try and meet new friends and break this rebelious behaviour before it is too late.
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Thanks everyone for posting. I didn't tell my parents about everything that has happened before, but I did tell them about how i'm ready to have sex with my boyfriend now. We've been together for about 15 months now and I don't regret a thing. I know things at my age are temporary and I also know sex shouldn't have been apart of my life when I was so young. But I'm ready now and I'm not dwelling on anything in the past. I made mistakes, but that is what makes me human I guess. 

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Your Awesome and give great advice.:) I'm 13 and still a virgin. Im scared cause I masterbate and I don't want ANYONE to find out. What if they do!? I'm soooo scared...:(
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