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Hi. we have an awesome fun family home. I'm 38, my hubby is 41. He said he thinks he is too old to start over. My kids are over the age of 7. We live in a bigger home, where all kids have their own room. I have asked my kids what they thought if Mommy had another baby. They got very excited. My husband got upset and said no way.. not in this economy, and he didn't want to be in his 60's with a teenager. We will any way though. My youngest is 7, then 8 is the middle child, and 16 from a prev marriage. I didn't want any more kids till... I started having these feelings in October 2010. I have dreams all the time about having a baby. Always in my mind. Is it fair that he is taking that away. The sibling that our kids can have to grow up with and love...

I feel in my body.. i have the energy for this. I am a stay at home mom... i want to raise another baby so much, to love and cherish.
How do I change his mind with positive feelings on this?
Thanks,
peanut13.

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This will sound harsh, I just don't know how to say it otherwise, sorry in advance.

Sorry, but you won't get my support.

If you had discussed this with your husband alone and not gone to the kids then it would be a different story. You're trying to pressure him. The kids don't know whats involved in raising a child. Your husband has valid concerns. If your youngest is 7 then he'll only be 53 with a teenager.

Sure you can continue to pressure him, you've already tried.

Don't you see what is going on. The 7 year old would have just started school full time a year or two ago. You aren't needed as much as the kids are getting older. You're at home in an empty house most of the day longing for having another child. You miss being needed.

Find a part time job. Get out and get involved with others. In a couple of years you'll have your grandchildren to have fun with and share that love.

Hope it helps.
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Hi. Thanks for the input... I did go to my husband first... before I said anything to my children. He is thinking about it... But that is as far as it has gone... I am not needing something to pass the time. Like a hobby, i have that.. or a pet... don't need that. I am looking to have a sibling for my kids... to share love with them and with a new baby.. a sibling.
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Thank you for being polite.

Your current children should not be involved in the decision. It is not their concern and they never should have been asked if they'd like another brother/sister. It is a choice for your husband and you to make, that's it.

The kids don't understand what is involved. It may be fun to play with the baby at first but then it comes time to feed, change, bathe, or the other thousands of things that need to be done. Will the kids do it? At first. They have their own lives though. They're going to want to be with their friends. Not at home watching the baby. It doesn't mean they won't love him/her.

Your youngest will be 8 by the time the baby is born so 10 years the current children will be out of the house. What happens then?

Having a sibling "for my kids" doesn't sound right. You do understand the risks of having a baby when you get older?

Don't get me wrong. I'm sure you're a great mom and you have a great family. Focus on what you have and not on what might be.

Ultimately it is your choice and your husbands. I respect whatever that joint decision may be. Good luck.
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