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My name is Natalie. I am 18 years old. I am a college student. I am pregnant and having an abortion in 6 days. I am so uncertain, it's hard to breathe.
When I first found out that I am pregnant, I was thrilled. I have had many problems with my reproductive system starting this year, I lost my left ovary in February 2010 due to a Durmoid Tumor. (They're nasty, google it if you want) Mine had teeth, long white hair and fluid that is found between joints in it. It flipped over and cut off all blood supply to my left ovary and I had both the tumor and my ovary taken out.
I have another durmoid tumor on my right ovary. Found this out about 2 months ago. I have been going back and forth to different specialists about getting my eggs frozen, sense it doesn't seem i'll have any ovary left.

I know, whoever is reading this must be thinking the same thing I am,"Well, you're pregnant, keep it, be thankful, and don't worry about that ovary!" But it's so much more complicated than that.

My significant other is 23, and is begging me to have an abortion. We have been together for 2 years, so he knows all about my worries about my reproductive system, but yet is not concerned with those facts.
His view, "Get an abortion, because I'm not ready and I don't think you are either. Your ovary works fine. Hence your pregnant. Get your eggs frozen. Maybe later down the road we'll try again."

My view "I'm 18, very young. Not a complete statistic, I graduated early, in college, a legal adult and very loving of all living things. I won't even let him hunt deer. I'm currently raising baby squirrels, round the clock every 4 hours, even in the middle of the night. Alone. I am very dedicated to everything I take interest in. I feel as if God has answered my worries about bearing children by allowing me to become pregnant. And I feel that if I terminate this pregnancy, I will have lost my only chance to have kids, naturally or by A.I. MY boyfriend is only concerned with what he wants and doesn't seem to care what I really want. I was so happy to see 6 different pregnancy tests read "positive" to him though, it was depressing. I have been reading up on a lot of things, from conception to birth from abortion to the pill. And all of it makes me soo sad. I can't hurt a spider, for me, terminating my child just seems so cruel and unforgiving. I have talked to other women and they all have pretty much said they regret it and for me to do what I think is best. I really want this baby. I do. But I cannot be selfish and expect to have the father around. He's threating me that if I have it, he will take custody. I want to say F***off, but i'm very much in love. I don't know why either anymore, I guess it's the pharamones. I have herd from a loved one, have the baby and forget him, if you know you can do it alone, do it...but the thing is, his family is loaded with money. He drives a 2000 BMW with rims, I drive a 95 nissan 240 that has seen much better days. I don't have TV even. So if I were to have the child, it's almost certain he will win custody. Not fair. I want it, he doesn't but would take it from me if we ever split."

I don't want to bring a baby into the world knowing it's father doesn't want it and I do so badly. I have cried every day and night about what to do. I told my BFF about my pregnancy and she told me that day that if I terminated it she would be so disapointed. That is something mom is suppost to say about me getting into trouble or something.

SO, I am writing to complete strangers, hoping you will give me advice. I really am so confused.
I'm scheduled for an abortion September 8th, 6 days from now. Please, please someone reply to this and help me out. It would mean the world to me.
I am the few, I am a good person all around, and don't know where to turn this time. I will have guilt either way I go, and I am scared sh*tless. Thank you for reading this, and please tell me your opinions.

Also, please e-mail any opinions.



thank you again.


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Hi, I am very sad to read your story. I found out two weeks ago that I was pregnant, this is unplanned. I am now 8 weeks along and I'm only 20 years old, my boyfriend is 19. My boyfriend is being so supportive through this and I could not imagine having a boyfriend like yours who did not want something that we created together. I commend you for staying strong and looking at both sides instead of just yours. Although, I strongly recommend that you keep this baby, who knows if you may be granted such a blessing in the future. I think you should leave that boyfriend behind and do this on your own. There is so much help out there that you can get. Your family can help you out in so many ways! But not only from your family but from the government as well. Like you'd probably have to drop out of school to get a full time job to raise the baby and after it's born you could get grants and loans to go back just for being a single mother. Just because his family may be loaded with money does not mean he will win custody. He could just be saying that to scare you into getting the abortion. Chances are if he does not want it now, he won't want it later down the line. I can understand not wanted to bring a child into the world when the father doesn't even want it but honey, you do! And you can love that child more than anything in the world and that is all that matters! Trust me, finding out that you are pregnant if it was unplanned is the scariest thing ever but when you hear that baby's heartbeat for the first time, all your fears will melt and you'll be over come with joy! And if your BBF would be disappointed for you to get the abortion, maybe she could help you out if you decide to keep the baby. To be your support and someone to talk to. If not, you can contact me through e-mail and I would be glad to talk to you and share this experience. My e-mail address is if you need anything or some advice you could ask me anything. I am like you, in which I don't like to hurt any living thing so I believe we'd have some things in common. I really hoped that I helped you in any way and I hope that you make the right decision for ONLY YOU and no one else! I wish you luck with everything.

Aimee


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Health Ace
6517 posts
hey aimless,

in short keep the baby there is no reason to end an innocent life. clearly you dont want to and you want the baby. your boyfriend does not need to be so selfish and crule.

like the person above me said there are many options but the one you can never take back is the one to end a life........

it will all work out fine and it sounds like your family is there to support you. thats a lot more than some people have.

also the fertility treatments down the road hold no garuntees and can have slim odds. you have a baby now so be thankfull and enjoy it :-)
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aimless consider adoption. Life is a precious gift. Many wonderful families out there are dying to have a child. Please reconsider and let your child have a chance even if its with another family. Some states have open adoptions allowing you some access to ur child even if only a picture and a summary every year. Please consider that option.
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I think you guys are taking this the wrong way, I'm not the one who is in need of advice, Natalie is. I'm keeping my baby.

Nataline, we haven't heard anything back from you, how are you doing? Have you changed your mind at all or decided to go through with it?
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Hi my gf is pregnant (haven't took a pregnancy test but she missed her first period). I'm 17 she's 17 we both live in Detroit Michigan. Wat do we do?
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If you are uncertain then i wouldn't do it, i recently had an abortion and i was so uncertain but did it anyways because i felt pressured by everybody this is a pain i have never known and i hope i never know again, i was so surprised by these feelings, its unbearable, you can never get your baby there is nothing you can do to change your decision. Abortion is a very personal choice and you have to make sure that you are completely certain, and you can live with this choice.
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Mr. Johnson1992:

First off, you should take a pregnancy test and start taking prenatal vitamins. After you do that you should get her to her doctor so they can confirm it and get her started on the right track! Any questions, just ask! I just went through it all. Good luck!
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I hope you listen to your heart and that of the baby living inside. Adoption is always a loving option. My husband was adopted and is grateful for a mother who chose life.
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*******IF YOU DON'T WANT TO HAVE AN ABORTION BUT DONT WANT THE BABY, DELIEVER THE BABY AND GIVE IT UP. I WOULD HAVE NO PROBLEMS KEEPING YOUR BABY. MY FIANCE AND I CAN'T HAVE ANY. HELP ME OUT. EMAIL ME IF YOU WANT ***this post is edited by moderator *** *** private e-mails not allowed **

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THANKS

THERESA
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So, did you have the aboration? Did you keep the baby and leave him or did he finally understand and said yes? Please write back.

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