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Hey. Ok I have been depressed for a while now, but I never felt this way. I never experienced something like this. My depression really bothers me and now, the newest thing is that she made me sexually frustrated and very asexual. I don't know why this happens and what I should do about this because it gets really frustrated and my boyfriend is also very mad at me about this. I have tried to explain him how I feel, but I think that he doesn't believe me at all. So, is there any cure about this whole situation? Any idea? 

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you say she made me sexually frustated and very asexual but then you say my boyfreind hmm confused / who is she ?
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Hi guys,

It seems to me like she is addressing depression as "she" instead of "it", Guest, she is saying that depression made her sexually frustrated and asexual.

This is quite a common thing that happens to people who are suffering from depression. Not only that you lose your will for having sex, but you lose your will for doing literally anything. I don't know what can you do to fix your problem. Depression is a hard fight, I know that. Is there a way that you can somehow make yourself want it? Or at least go for the foreplay and see if that makes you want it, huh?

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I think this is where a lot of the confusion comes in. Many people don't understand that there is a separation to asexuality. It probably doesn't change who you're attracted to, it's just that you don't feel like acting on that attraction anymore. You probably have an incorrect definition of asexuality in mind (something like "asexuality = not having/wanting sex"), so you mistakenly claim that your depression has turned you asexual.

If I am right, you are still attracted to your boyfriend so you just need to do something about it. Try making a first step, try to force sex, it will probably work.
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This is normal. I wish I could have said otherwise but it is normal and therefore, you can't do much about it. You can try and bring some sort of games into your sex life and see if that helps. Search for things that you think would turn you on and talk to your boyfriend about them. I don't think that I can give you a better advice than this one. Sure, you can always try and fight your depression, if you win your fight against depression, your sexual frustration and asexuality will go away as well. Good luck with this.

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A higher rate of depression in women is connected to hormonal changes. This is why a woman’s risk of depression may increase before and during menstruation, after childbirth, when juggling work, home, and family life, during perimenopause and menopause.

Women are the most likely to experience persistent “bluesy” feelings that can make them feel less confident and less worthy. These feelings can drastically change your overall sex life.

As women age, physical factors can make sex less enjoyable (and sometimes even painful). Changes in the vaginal wall can make sexual activity unpleasant. Also, lower levels of estrogen can disrupt natural lubrication. Such factors can be depressing for women if they do not seek help to find relief.

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I am sorry because you didn't understand me well, but I was very frustrated when I was writing this post. When I wrote "she" I was talking about depression because sometimes I have feeling that this is another girl that bothers me and my boyfriend and very often I call it "she". I hope that you understand it. Maybe it is confusing, but that is me. I still can't explain my boyfriend why I feel this way, I think that he really don't understand me. He don't understand that I am depressed and stressed. Last night, I was sure that I want to have sex with him, but very soon - no...It seems that there is no cure for me..
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I totally understand you. My depression also has name. I call it "Miss annoying". And people look at me very weird when I call it by the name. So I also say "she" sometimes. It is totally normal. When you are depressed you are out of everything and you are not in the mood to do anything. I am depressed very often, but I have that luck that my boyfriend understands me and he supports me. When I am not in the mood for the sex, he usually asks me do I need something. If I am very nervous, he goes away because he don't want to bother me. I love him and I am grateful to have him.
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I have to tell you that I really envy you because you have such a beautiful boyfriend who understands you. Mine is trying to understand me, but he can't and I can't blame him for that. I really want to be intimate with him but when that needs to happen I just don't have a will for it. So, are there any things that I can do to stay interested in it or I am a lost case?

I don't want to lose my boyfriend but I think that he is going to leave me very soon if I don't change myself somehow...

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Look, you can always talk to someone who is an expert and there are a lot of people who can help you deal with your depression. So, I can see that you haven't tried talking to anyone at all and you should definitely do this. Doctors can help you, they can give you some therapy, some medications that can calm your depression down and maybe you will be in the mood for the sex after it. Trust me, you are not the only one who is dealing with things like depression. Depression is a part of a people's life. You need to have strong faith and you will win the depression.

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