Hello. I'm 34 year old female and I'm not so happy with my sexual life. To be honest with you- I really like sex and I've really enjoyed having sex with my husband. He’s a bit younger then I and in perfect body shape and condition. So, the sex was really amazing. But, I wish I could say that the situation is the same now.
In a past year or even more, our sex is terrible or sometimes, even impossible because he’s having big problems with his erection. Earlier, I really enjoyed in sex, but now- my main preoccupation is to get him erect and keep him in that state. How could this be? He is perfectly healthy and there is nothing wrong with him, beside this. Is my husband impotent?
Hello. I have just read your post and decided to help you but in fact, I want to help all man in generally because you see, the same moment they loose somehow their erectile performance- something is wrong and everybody is complaining on them. You shouldn’t jump so quickly on diagnosis because- virtually all men occasionally fail to get an erection and that’s complete normal. The most common reasons of impotency are some vascular disease, diabetes, some conditions such as multiple sclerosis, Parkinson's disease and spinal cord injuries.
But the most common reason is some psychological problem. The god news is that it’s treatable. Experts often treat psychologically based impotence using techniques that decrease anxiety associated with intercourse.
In fact for most men the problem is NOT psychological. It is usually a medical problem, some of the possible causes are mentioned by the previous poster, but there are others. (Though to be fair it may be a combination of both). The best thing you can do is encourage him to seek some help. He might prefer to go and see a specialist (urologist), though most GP's are quite able to help in the first instance. He needs with your loving and supportive help to see this as a medical problem that effects many men of all ages. He should be able to select a male doctor to visit if that helps also.
Go see an endocronologist and get his testostrone checked
What if the doctor says it's psychological after tests have been taken and you can afford to see a psychologist? Is there something else that can be done?
it's quite often caused by psychological reasons. the thing is most men are pretty insecure when it comes to their penis and sexual prowess. it may originally have been caused by fatigue or stress but has been exacerbated by anxiety and pressure to get/keep an erection. still, he should get checked as it is likely to be an indicator of a medical problem. if nothing shows up he just needs to destress and you'll need to bear with him and try not to pressure him to "perform" in bed.
The possibility I am about to suggest is different from the other theories mentioned, and I hope it is not taken the wrong way. My boyfriend had the same problems, for a couple of months at least. He ended up taking OTC erection medicine. I had a strange feeling as to why this was happening, and then I later found out that my now, fiance, was addicted to opiates. Any type of opiate or even narcotics, benzos, amphetamines, etc. can cause MAJOR erectile dysfunction. I highly doubt this would be your case, but one can never be entirely sure. Whatever it is, I hope you find the answer and everything goes back to normal. ;-) :-D
I would first check his testosteron levels, thyroid levels, prolactin levels (screen out a prolactinoma).
Try the Penis Lasso...you can get it in sex stores. it may be called a ring too. Get the adjustable one. its made of rubber or latex. Once your man is hard he slips this ring around his member and testacles and there is a little strap to tighten it. Similar to how a neck tie works. it keeps the blood from flowing back and keeps him hard. its works. you'll be tapping out in no time!!! :-P
So maybe he is impotent...how about trying toys and other things...who cares
You know we all care,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,That is why I tapped in to this. I think you should maybe dissolve yourself from commenting. I am really interested in what others have to say! >:(
I give you all my sympathy. The whole business of being rejected is awful whether it's due to a medical or other issue. I live with this daily and my husband stays downstairs until the early hours presumably to avoid me and intimacy. I want to escape!
I have the same problem. My husband is 32, and I am 31. We got married last year. I knew we have a few issues in the bedroom but we were working on it. Ver occassionally he would go soft and I would jerk him off until we got back into it. On our honey moon we had constant sex. But now, the decline is huge. But, he continually masterbates as I've continually caught him in the shower or watching porn but when it comes to sex wiith me he can't keep an errection. The difficulty is that now I'm really worried about sex. We have sex so infrequently that it hurts me. He gets upset if I need to use a lubricant, so I try and finger myself (without him noticing) to loosen myself up. I'm so worried about getting him off that I'm not wet or enjoying it. The whole experience sucks and I don't know what to do. I've always loved sex. I don't orgasm - ever now because the sex is now all bout him and hoping he'll keep it up. I suggested that we both try and just rediscover ourselves without actually having sex, like rediscover our bodies. But, we never have sex. I'm always trying to initate something. And he's tired or doesn't want to. If I didn't initate it - we wouldn't have sex. We're lucky to have sex once a month or once every two months. What do I do? I don't think I could suggest that he see someone because he would feel shamed. He already feels shamed and I try not be be dissapointed and I smile and I pretend it's all okay. That I enjoy getting him off. But it's not okay - there are two people in this relationship. What do you do??? What can I do?
me too facing the same problem i am 50 male and my wife 45 i lost erection and she needs sex i am unable to perform now she use her finger to get sanctification now both are us are happy since i lost my interest in sex completely.
Have you thought about a penile implant? He's still impotent but mechanically things work as if he weren't, which is waht really matters.