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masturbates alote I finding c-- stain on the sheet in his underware. I walked in on him using my gel sock.( he does it in his sleep) When were in bed I wake up from him doing it he said he does not remember. I said u were sitting up on the side of the bed.
The one night he went up before me I was watching TV I saw he sheets moving so I pull them down and he was C**ming. I flipped and scream he does remeber he said

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This is evidently an emotional issue for you. I'm very sorry his behavior makes you feel angry.

Why does his masturbation make you feel angry? What is it you would like from him? These are questions you need to ask yourself in order to prepare yourself for a conversation with him. It's very important that you discuss his behavior with you because this is likely to affect your marriage in the future.

Find a good time to have a discussion with him. When you finally do have a discussion with him, use I statements, such as "I feel..." and "I think..." This will help him to not feel attacked. Also validate the things that he says. For instance, after he makes a comment, ask a question to make sure you understood what he's saying correctly. Again, this will help him to not feel attacked and to help the conversation keep calm so you can both communicate well.

My guess is you don't believe him when he says that he doesn't remember. Tell him why you think it's being untruthful and how that makes you feel. This could make him feel defensive, so uplift him by saying, "I don't want to accuse you. I'm just concerned about us." (Or perhaps something similar.)

If problems continue because of your husband's masturbation, be open with him about how this will effect things. Will you need to seek counseling? Can you only let it go so far? But whenever you talk about this, try to keep calm and be validating. Otherwise, communication may suffer.
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