I passed a church this morning which had posted on its sign: Stop, drop and roll will not work in Hell.
(Last week they had: How will you spend eternity? Smoking or non-smoking?)
Religion with a punch line. :LOL:
(Last week they had: How will you spend eternity? Smoking or non-smoking?)
Religion with a punch line. :LOL:
What church, seems like I've passed the same one.
It's the smaller of the two Baptist churches in Tucker. (I think there has to be a book of one-liners a lot of the churches use.)
Must have seen it somewhere else then. I rarely go in to Tucker.
I think you're right about the book of one-liners.
I think you're right about the book of one-liners.
I've seen that second one on a few bumper stickers around here.
My favorite was:
"Read your Bible, it'll scare the HELL out of you!"
"Read your Bible, it'll scare the HELL out of you!"
"Never give the devil a ride! He will always want to drive!"
"God promises a safe landing, not a calm passage."
Which prompts me to ask: Why would you want God as your co-pilot? (I think I'd let the Almighty drive.)
Boy I wish our local churches had a sense of humor. The German church by the kids' school boasted ARE YOU GOING TO HELL? for weeks last fall.
There is actually a newsletter for churches that gives them that kind of filler material for their church newsletters!
Have you seen the God Speaking billboards?
"Don't Make me come down there!"
"Meet me at my house before the game on sunday"
"Keep using my name in vain and I'll make the traffic worse"
Have you seen the God Speaking billboards?
"Don't Make me come down there!"
"Meet me at my house before the game on sunday"
"Keep using my name in vain and I'll make the traffic worse"
This reminds me of a fubby story. My cousin Philip is a Baptist minister and a real holy-roly type with little sense of humor. He actually had written on the back window of his van "I'm not lost, Jesus is my-co pilot"...(he changes them periodically but always has some religious message written there) and we were at my aunt's funeral up in NJ where no one knew the area. We are the last car out of the cemetary on the way to lunch, and of course promptly get on the freeway and lose everyone. So we're bellyaching because we didn't think to ask what town the restaurant was in, and were ready to give up & drive home, when out of nowhere up ahead we see Phil and his van!!!
We naturally followed him (and his copilot ;) ) and arrived at lunch. Being smartasses, we had to go in and tell him, "you're right.....Jesus saved us, dude!" and then told him the story and promptly got treated to a dead serious lecture on how we need more faith in our lives, etc etc.....
The rest of us heathens were making jokes about it all day.....
We naturally followed him (and his copilot ;) ) and arrived at lunch. Being smartasses, we had to go in and tell him, "you're right.....Jesus saved us, dude!" and then told him the story and promptly got treated to a dead serious lecture on how we need more faith in our lives, etc etc.....
The rest of us heathens were making jokes about it all day.....
lovingly referred to as "too heavenly minded to be of any earthly good" btw, here is the website for those "God Speaks" billboards