Ok so yesterday I was talking to a female and she mentioned that she was gay? Since then I keep questioning my sexuality. Ive never been worried about this before and it just was playing on my mind since yesterday. I keep having gay thoughts and I want them to go away. I cringe when I think of having a boyfriend and I dont look at men in a sexual way. I dont think about girls anymore and when I do It doesn't feel right. Before I was always thinking about girls, having sex, having a girlfriend. These gay thoughts have literally taking over my life and I want piece of mind. I suffer from severe anxiety, depression and im a hypochondriac. Im on fluoxetine 20mg and they are making me feel worse. I just want these thoughts to go away and im scared incase I turn gay. I have nothing against gays but I just wouldn't want to be gay. I keep thinking about suicide because these thoughts are taking over my life. I have this funny feeling at the end of my penis, it feels like tension and its been there 24.7 since yesterday ever since I had these gay thoughts. I cant imagine me being with a man. I can see myself with a woman. Someone please help. Thank you
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Thinking about any sexual activity or scenario can be arousing. That is the nature of sex. That does not mean you want to engage in that activity, join in with that scene or even approve of it. A married man may see a couple in a passionate embrace, or a scantily dressed girl, and be aroused. That does not mean he wants to engage in sexual activity with them. It does not make him an adulterer. The answer is to try to put the thoughts in context, dismiss them, and concentrate on the positive. A husband who is aroused by another woman should turn his thoughts to his wife. So start deliberately thinking positively about girls and having a girlfriend. You can't stop the birds flying over your head, but you can stop them nesting in your hair.
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Hi -- the thing that jumps out the most from your question is FEAR -- the fear that you might be some thing or some WAY that you oughtn't. That fear is the thing you should really be looking at. Who TOLD you what being "gay" is or means, or whether it is good or bad? Your body is trying to give you certain messages that you are fighting and ignoring. You MIGHT be one of the many many people who feel comfortable being BI-sexual ... that is, they can find pleasure, love and affection from both genders. . You MIGHT in fact be gay. You might not.
Every human being falls somewhere on this spectrum, from VERY heterosexual to VERY homosexual, and every variation in between. What is important is to accept WITHOUT JUDGEMENT the very special, individual human being you are, and not try to fit yourself into one kind of box or another. You are tormenting yourself where that is surely not necessary. Explore what you are feeling, don't deny it. You may very well turn away from those feelings naturally, in time. But there is no need for you to hurt yourself this way. You deserve to feel good about yourself, and a clear-eyed acceptance of what you feel and don't feel is a big part of that.
Respect who you are. WE do!
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