Hello,
I feel bad even starting the topic with the bipolar comment as i am not a medical professional. I just got out of a relationship which was rocky fro a few months as I never knew from day to day how my partner was feeling. She would read into everything I said or did. I would buy tickets to an event that she would enjoy and she would have a bad week(CPA works hard) my thought was to make life a little easier we can see the hockey team another night why dont we just stay close to home and do dinner...........her rationale I want to take someone other girl. Another game I was sick all week and was up for the game but not a late night out at the bars. My thought lets go to the game and you can hang out with your best friend from college who lives near me and would love to see you......her response, I dont have to go to the game you can take someone else. I booked tickets for Key West on a Monday and she complained about certain things regarding the trip for the next 2 days and it had me at my wits end. I think someone is trying to get me back for never putting a partner at the forefront of what is important, she is or I thought she was. We had a rough few days and on Friday she seemd back on track only to avoid me all day Saturday and I had enough and told her to cancel her ticket, no response until Sunday when she went on a tirade calling me a loser and every other bad comment a partner would love to hear. She broke up and have not heard from her in 10 days. I sent her a email telling her I was sorry and missed her and wanted some items back that were purchased mutually for the 2 of us to enjoy. Was it a gift i guess so but she had ruined a few other events with her actions that cost me money for no reason but her being all over the place. I would do anything for this girl, and would love to see her get help. How can you look at property together, talk about nights I am away for work when we may get married that she would like to stay with her poppop and planning of trips over the next year.......then be done. :'( I am hurt, not sure if it was the attack on my character, she said i lied the entire 7 months I knew her.....I have never been more honest with a partner in my forty years. Would love some input and advice....
I feel bad even starting the topic with the bipolar comment as i am not a medical professional. I just got out of a relationship which was rocky fro a few months as I never knew from day to day how my partner was feeling. She would read into everything I said or did. I would buy tickets to an event that she would enjoy and she would have a bad week(CPA works hard) my thought was to make life a little easier we can see the hockey team another night why dont we just stay close to home and do dinner...........her rationale I want to take someone other girl. Another game I was sick all week and was up for the game but not a late night out at the bars. My thought lets go to the game and you can hang out with your best friend from college who lives near me and would love to see you......her response, I dont have to go to the game you can take someone else. I booked tickets for Key West on a Monday and she complained about certain things regarding the trip for the next 2 days and it had me at my wits end. I think someone is trying to get me back for never putting a partner at the forefront of what is important, she is or I thought she was. We had a rough few days and on Friday she seemd back on track only to avoid me all day Saturday and I had enough and told her to cancel her ticket, no response until Sunday when she went on a tirade calling me a loser and every other bad comment a partner would love to hear. She broke up and have not heard from her in 10 days. I sent her a email telling her I was sorry and missed her and wanted some items back that were purchased mutually for the 2 of us to enjoy. Was it a gift i guess so but she had ruined a few other events with her actions that cost me money for no reason but her being all over the place. I would do anything for this girl, and would love to see her get help. How can you look at property together, talk about nights I am away for work when we may get married that she would like to stay with her poppop and planning of trips over the next year.......then be done. :'( I am hurt, not sure if it was the attack on my character, she said i lied the entire 7 months I knew her.....I have never been more honest with a partner in my forty years. Would love some input and advice....
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Hi honey! 1st of all BIG HUGS! 2nd you stated that you were forty! IS that the same for her too? how old is she?
When you are dealing with a mentally unstable person - or mentally ill person - it is VERY VERY difficult! I have a feeling that she is pre-menopause or menopausal! Some women - due to dramatic fluctuations in their hormones - can even be violent! One of my dearest friends is going through this right now and has even started screaming at her son - for nothing! I told her she needs to talk to someone and get some help! And your ex is CLASSIC of needing help!
I study people and I think there are 2 chains of though here, 1. She is menopausal or actually bi polar OR 2. She is doing everything in her power to end this relationship for awhile, but you kept trying, so instead of telling people "Yeah I dumped this really nice guy" she can complain now to make you not sound so great! So try and think back about when this started, and IF she is around 40 when you were with her at the beginning of your years together, was she wacko around the time of her period - this is a HUGE indicator of how they will be through menopause!
When you are dealing with a mentally unstable person - or mentally ill person - it is VERY VERY difficult! I have a feeling that she is pre-menopause or menopausal! Some women - due to dramatic fluctuations in their hormones - can even be violent! One of my dearest friends is going through this right now and has even started screaming at her son - for nothing! I told her she needs to talk to someone and get some help! And your ex is CLASSIC of needing help!
I study people and I think there are 2 chains of though here, 1. She is menopausal or actually bi polar OR 2. She is doing everything in her power to end this relationship for awhile, but you kept trying, so instead of telling people "Yeah I dumped this really nice guy" she can complain now to make you not sound so great! So try and think back about when this started, and IF she is around 40 when you were with her at the beginning of your years together, was she wacko around the time of her period - this is a HUGE indicator of how they will be through menopause!
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She is 33 and mostly healthy she is very thin at 5 7 and 115 lbs, needs to eat more is all. Her emotions are still all over the place tried to reach out about tickets and she flew off the handle saying she was the victim and she deserved tickets and if she gave them back she would let me know. Says I lied and cheated, I did not. I sent flowers Saturday and was waiting for her to blow up or not respond she responded "Thank you very much for the flowers" I respnded glad you liked them your very welcome. She then said she loved them. However I tried to reach out to sit down and talk and nothing. Im a lost soul and want to help her but it is causing me to lose sleep and not focus on work properly.
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I know this is hard! But I am pretty sure she is bi-polar or peri menopausal! You didn't mention about her monthly's can you see a pattern of how she is around the time of her period!?
IF she has been fine and is just SO belidgerent, then it's time to walk away honey! This is making you miserable and too upset! And IF it turns out that she is putting on to you her own feelings then you will feel even worse! She needs to explain to you WHY she is doing all of this! And if you want my advice - until she is ready to aplogize or talk about her behaviour - then you need to NOT contact her at all! IF she doesn't get a hold of you then you will know the way she feels! IF she reaches out to ask why, you NEED an explanation and quite frankly a HUGE apology for her behaviour! You deserve more than what she is giving you honey! You are worth it, and demand more from her!
IF she has been fine and is just SO belidgerent, then it's time to walk away honey! This is making you miserable and too upset! And IF it turns out that she is putting on to you her own feelings then you will feel even worse! She needs to explain to you WHY she is doing all of this! And if you want my advice - until she is ready to aplogize or talk about her behaviour - then you need to NOT contact her at all! IF she doesn't get a hold of you then you will know the way she feels! IF she reaches out to ask why, you NEED an explanation and quite frankly a HUGE apology for her behaviour! You deserve more than what she is giving you honey! You are worth it, and demand more from her!
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Since it sounds like hormonal! It is up to HER to get help for it! Because believe me, when a woman or man is reacting to the fluctuations of their hormones and they don't get help they are a ticking time bomb! My mother was psychotic around each month! And it was VERY frightening! And sometimes you know they don't even remember! So back away, and whenever or if she ever feels "normal" just tell her you have had it! And she has to make a choice wether to have you in her life - and get help for her crazy outbreaks, or to tell you to leave! As this is NOT fair for such a nice guy to keep getting abused! And THAT is EXACTLY what she is doing - she IS abusing you!
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