help sexually confused

Dear sexually confused, human sexuality is a very complicated issue that most people do not understand. Human sexuality is like a continuum. Picture a very long ruler, and on one end is homophobic (people that hate gays and lesbians) and on the other end are gay and lesbians.  Of course in the middle is bisexuality. Each degree in between homophobic and bisexuality brings an individual closer to the possibility that they may someday have a same-sex relationship. It does not mean that you are lesbian gay.  It is difficult to explain in writing--- I would do much better explaining this verbally. I will explain it like this: so one degree from homophobic is someone that tends to be jealous of the same-sex and cannot appreciate the beauty of a person of the same-sex. Another inch shows a person that can look at a person of the same-sex and appreciate their beauty and that is able to have good relationships with a same-sex person. An inch from that Mark is someone that can really admire and appreciate a person of the same-sex. And if one day they met somebody of the same-sex it is possible for them to have a sexually intimate relationship, but it does not mean they're gay it just means they're very open. In the middle of the ruler we have bisexuality. Many people that feel that they are bisexual are really gay and just want to be straight so they try to have sexual relationships with the opposite sex. But someone that is truly bisexual does not have a preference. They are attracted to men as well as women. An inch from the bisexuality Mark is someone that prefers the same-sex but often engages in opposite sexual relationships. I think you understand what I am trying to explain. At the very end of this ruler are homosexuals that only want to be with the same-sex. In fact being with the opposite sex really grosses them out. What I would suggest is you remain friends with your girlfriend. You might want to broach the subject saying something like" have you ever felt attracted to a female"? Or you could say you're my best friend and sometimes I feel that we were more than just friends. That we are like sisters. And see what she says. The fact that she slept in the same bed with you and cuddled with you shows that she is probably in between homophobic and bisexual. And reading what you wrote it sounds like that you are at the same place. And quite possibly she might be bisexual or lesbian and not want to tell you. Continue to spend your time with her --continue to be her good friend. I noticed that you got a reply from a man and he was thinking like men think -- three some. You never want to have a threesome with someone you care about because it ruins the relationship. I'm not against sexual exploitation, but I've been alive for 50 years and I've had threesomes and every single time they have ruined the relationship. I would not suggest that you tell the boyfriend of your girlfriend about your feelings. It can backfire horribly in so many ways. I want you to know that you are probably straight. You are just open, loving and kind.