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I wish I was dead. When I was young (about 12) I took advantage of my younger cousin (6). She trusted me and I manipulated her into kissing me a couple of times. Then one time while she was asleep, I knew girls were different but not how, so I looked under her panties while she was asleep... I didnt think much of it then. But now that I know the weight of what i did im not sure if i can live with myself... the guilt is crushing me and i feel like i cant even tell anyone. If i confessed to her would she feel even worse knowing the truth? Is she happier in ignorance? My parents would be heartbroken if they knew what i did. I wish i was dead that way i can be free from this guilt and my family never has to face the travesty that i did...

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Health Ace
6541 posts

Hey there I know how terrible it can be when guilt eats at you . Honnestly simply just looking at your cousin is not that bad. it is very normal for people your age to be curious and most people have their first experiences with what others look like with a family member of some sort.   I would not let this eat you up and It would probably be best to not tell your cousin. if you think of it people see others naked when they change babies diapers so it is kind of like that.  it would be different if you were having sex with her but simply seeing what she looked like (especially at the age you were at) is not worth getting too upset about in my opinion. 

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You were just a turned on 12 year old and probably regretted it right after. It happened a while ago and you obviously would never do it again so forgive yourself and move on
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Hi Guest

You were 12 and you made a mistake your curiosity at that age is understandable you acted inappropriately but you didn't touch her.
If you had done this with no regrets things might be different you have and continue to punish yourself for looking at her.
Telling her would only hurt her and upset her and other people in your family.
You were only 12 and the lesson you have learned from this will guarantee it never happens happen again.
You are no doubt a nice kid that just made a mistake that has left you dealing with the guilt for some time.
You have punished yourself enough and have learned from your mistake its time to try and move past this and work on forgiving yourself.
The punishment you have given yourself proves you regret what you did and no doubt you would never consider doing anything like this again.
You can't change the past but you have learned from this mistake.
Its time to forgive yourself and move past the mistake you made at 12 we all make the occasional bad choice try to focus on becoming the best person you can be.
Start with forgiving yourself and be grateful for the lesson you learned.

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