Is he considered a heavy marijuana / cocaine user?

Another thing is our sex life. We never have sex. I caught in his computer that he enters porn sites. He never even tries to have sex. He showsn no interest at all. I don’t My boyfriend is 39 and smokes marijuana every day (smokes from the age of 18) around two to three joints a day. We live together. He is severely lazy--which I assume is because of the long-term smoking. He does small things around the house, (taking out trash, put the dishes in the sink) even sometimes does the laundry but many days he is bored to even go for newspapers., etc., etc. He doesn't work. He is a renter and never worked much in his life. He plays in the stock exchange, and gambles a lot in the internet (poker and football bet) . He has a university degree but his career goals were mostly theoretical. We are economically independent (theoretically) many times he runs out of money and I am taking care of super markets and giving him like daily pocket money. I have a full time job the last 17 years. Of course he is not interested in working more, or finding something more to do and whenever I confront him he says that he is OK with what he has and needs nothing more . He has even told me that he prefers to have pot and not everything to eat than having everything to eat and no pot. Here I have to mention that he also used to do cocaine (since he was 20). He has limited down in doing one time per month at least that is what he tells me.When I met him 5 month ago I believe that he was doing cocaine regularly. We used to have sex. Then from a point suddenly he stopped having sex with me said he is not feeling very well (kind of depression) and he has quit cocaine. know wether he masturbates or not. I have also caught some chats of his on facebook with girls talking sexy with them. He said he misses the things they do (cocaine and threesomes etc). From what I read in the net and from what I understood from his messages when they get high they do weird things, wich most propably he cant do with me. With me he shows no interest in pleasing me at all. He seems so consumed in his things. He is not getting physical at all. Another way he spends basically his entire day (and night) is video games. It is almost non-stop. He stays up late playing games, poker, and facebook and will never come to bed with me. He ends up falling asleep on the couch every night. Whenever I confront him he says that he watched a bit TV and fell asleep. We have been together 5 months and these all have been going on since July. I can count on 1 hand how many times we've slept in the same bed and how many times we had sex ( I believe they were all under cocaine use). I've even offered that he can play games/watch tv/whatever in bed or that he could stay up late to play games and then just come back to bed when he is done. He won't even do that. He ends up awake most of the night (with the exception of a few hours of sleep) and while I am gone to work during the day, and then sleeps late afternoon/early evening (usually while I am home). He also has NO emotional responses to anything. No sadness, no happiness, nothing. The only emotion I ever see out of him is anger--other than that he is completely blank. Of course most times he is sweet towards me and protective. He talks of the future like that we are going to be together.. Is marijuana and cocaine causing his attitude or if it is just him. Some times he cant breath and also takes Xanax. Sometimes when I nag he will change his ways, and sometimes will for about a day or so, come to bed for an hour . but it always goes back to the same old thing. I've even offered to help get him counseling (either him alone or together), but he refuses. I am sure he has deeper issues. Like family. Comes from a rather destroyed family. He is not willing to quit smoking marijuana. The only people he surrounds himself with are people who smoke weed and do cocaine. He isn't very social at all, but the few people he has met/hung out with always smoke weed. The past two months he doesn’t want to see any of his friends because he wants to avoid bad habits but he has done cocaine twice within this period with one of his close friends. Also his ex girlfriends were all cocaine users (not daily but occasionally). I also what to stress oit that I have never tried any kind of drug. Is he considered a heavy marijuana user? Is he a drug addict or not? What might the cocaine have done to him? Please help me! so I can decide whether this is something I should continue to try to work on with him or if I need to just leave. Thank you all for hearing me out!