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Hi, I started taking pills about 5 years ago. My girlfriend had a boob job and got a script for 50 ES 10/500 Hydros. She took one of them and was sick to her stomach. At the time I had tried them on a few occasions so she asked if I wanted them. Of course my answer was YES!!

I was there to take care of her after her surgery and for 5 days straight I just popped pills and made her food and helped her around. Watching movies, popping pills and drinking red wine became my favorite thing to do. Well after that I started buying them on the street and it was always either the yellow 10/325 norcs or the blue 10/500 percs.

It started innocently enough - a few a day, but before long I was up to about 15 a day. By then I was buying bottles of 1,000 norcs at a time from my guy. $2,500 each time. The key was, I would turn 700 of them to friends of mine at $3.50 each and make back $2,450, so I was paying $50 for 300 of them. This went on for years. One day, about a year and a half ago, I was introduced to Oxycontin.

I swallowed them at 1st until a friend told me to crush and snort them. I did just that, and became incredibly addicted to those as well. So, for the past year and a half I was snorting about 240mg of Oxy a day and eating about 7 or 8 norcs as well. It was pure hell. It wasn't fun anymore. That feeling was long gone.

Instead, it was about feeling as good as I possibly could (NORMAL, as we say) so I could go about my daily life, go to work, spend time with family, friends, sex life, etc, hoping no one would catch on to the fact that I had a serious addiction. For the past couple of months I have wanted to stop but was too afraid of the WD symptoms. I had not really experienced a complete WD from opiates up to that point.

I had been lucky, I always had enough on me whether it was norcs, percs, vikes, Oxy, etc. I always made sure of that. I would make sure that when I was down to about a 7 day supply, I would go into danger mode and call around until I got more. I never, ever did not have any on me. One time a few years ago I didn't have any all day until about 6pm and it was the worst I have ever felt in my life so I made sure that would never happen again, and it didn't.

Anyway, if you are still with me, about a month ago a dear friend of mine overdosed on Oxy. He was actually taking it for a legitimate back problem, never snorted it, just took too much one day and his heart gave out. I was shocked when I heard the news and it was that day that I realized what a selfish person I was.

He HAD to take them to walk. He didn't want to take them, he HAD to or he couldn't get out of bed in the morning and couldn't even take a walk with his wife. I didn't HAVE to take these things, I did it by choice, I had no pain, I just wanted to get high. I obviously became addicted and in my brain I THOUGHT I HAD to take them, but that is BullSh!t. That day I called and got an appointment with a Doc to figure out a plan.

My appointment wasn't until the following Wednesday (it was Friday at the time) so I made sure I had enough Oxy to get me through until that afternoon. I was 100% committed to Wednesday being my last day so I got rid of all the pills I had, and let everyone know that I no longer would have them so don't bother calling me unless it was regarding something else.

I saw the Doc, told him how much I was taking a day, was completely honest with him, and he gave me the choice to get on Suboxen. I said I was ready and after hearing exactly what they were ( I already knew cuz I had friends on them, but wanted to hear him out) I left, went and picked up my script, with a script on Klonpin to help for the first 24 hours, picked up a few movies, some red wine, and had some xanex too, and went home to deal with it.

I was fine that night, watched some movies, drank my wine, ate xanex and klonpin (sp?) and fell to sleep about 2:00 am. I wanted to sleep as late as possible but woke up at 6:00am already starting to feel pretty bad. I SO wanted to do a line of Oxy. At that very moment, it probably would have been the best line I had ever had in my life, but I made a promise to myself, to friends and a couple loved ones, and most importantly to my friend in Heaven who was there because he overdosed on them.

I poured another glass of wine and took 2mg of xanex. Believe it or not, I fell to sleep again pretty quickly but this time didn't wake up until noon. When I saw the clock I was so happy. By this time I felt terrible but I knew I only had to wait until about 4:00 before I could take the Subox. I just stayed in bed and turned on ESPN. For the last couple of hours I couldn't even move, it was horrible. I was going through withdrawal very badly and this was all new to me because I never really experienced it in all the years I used.

Well, 4:00 hit and as SOON as the clock went from 3:59 to 4:00 I put an 8mg Suboxen under my tongue. After about 20 minutes, I still felt terrible. By this time I was cursing myself for doing it, I was cursing the Doc, I was in a bad place. I thought this medicine was a joke and was not going to work on me. Then, like a light switch almost, I started to feel pretty good. I got out of bed, went out to my patio, lit up a smoke, and looked out at the ocean and started laughing. I felt so good I was in shock.

I felt better than I had in many, many years. I was so happy. The hell of the past 4 hours was gone. The hell of the past 5 years was gone. I was so hopeful that minute. That exact minute in time, I will remember it forever. I felt like myself again. This was 31 days ago, exactly. I have not taken a pill or snorted Oxy since then.

I know that 31 days is not that long, and I know there is still a much lengthier road ahead for me but I wanted to share my story for anyone who is contemplating getting off of opiates. I never thought I could do it. I was convinced I would be on them for the rest of my life.

Suboxen worked for me. Let me rephrase that, Suboxen has been working for me so far and I am very happy I made the choice. It was only a matter of time, I thought, before I would OD myself. If I did that to my family I would be the most selfish person in the world. I was prescribed 4 of them per day, then the taper down each week.

After the first week of only doing about 2 a day, I am down to less than one a day right now. I hope to be off of the Suboxen by July. That is the plan anyway, but I will see where I am and how I feel when that day arrives. I hope my struggle and how good I feel now is helpful to at least one person. If it is, then I am glad I wrote this. It gets better people. In all honesty, it gets much better. If I can do it, so can you. Have a wonderful evening.

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We have just put my 25 yr. old son in detox. He had a 6 yr. Loratab habit (about 10 a day) and was scared to death of WD. He lost his job, his girlfriend, and hit rock bottom. We were shocked to find out he was an addict. Since he lived downstate, we don't see him much and never knew about his problem. He worked in a hospital for 18 months and none of his superiors knew either and they are supposed to be trained to know these things. I am angry and scared at the same time. I feel deceived, and since they don't let him call us very much at his rehab center, I don't know how he is fairing with his recovery. It is good to know that people can do the detoxing on their own. I hear that if you have a bedrock value system (self control, self-esteem, relationships with others, accomplisment and competence, and health) that your recovery can be completely successful and that is what I am hoping/praying for. I have always been able to balance and cope in whatever situation I am in, so it absolutely infuriates me that he couldn't be as strong. I hate what it has done to our family, it has made us so depressed, there is no sleep, no one eats, there's a lot of crying and some self-blame, although I know the choice was his. We have spent an enormous amount of money on the attorney (he committed a crime to get his Rx) and the rehab program. I hope his experience is as successful as yours and I hope we have a light at the end of the long dark tunnel, because our priority is getting him well again. God bless you for sharing and I hope you will continue to enjoy many lovely sunrises and sunsets enjoying your sobriety. Toni
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i am a 22 year old single mom who has been addicted to lortab mainly for the best three years. I am sick of having this addiction and i am on day three of quitting cold turkey! my main problem is the achey legs! Can anyone please give me advice on how i can keep up and not relapse and get back onto pain killers?
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:cry: well im really happy to hear that you have stoped doing all that. I just lost my dad a month ago he was only 37 years old. He had a very bad car accident and broke his back and had to undergo meny meny back surgerys that went on for about 2 years along with the law suit. well he had alot of pain meds and deppression meds and blood pressure meds and out of work (he was a workaholic) well after long the scrips wernt enuff they wernt making it thought the month so he found them on the street and he found bad dr that would give them to him. He wreaked 3 cars. He caused a lot of family fighting and alot of emberrisment. he would get really messed up Know one really wanted to be around him. well at the end he relized this and wanted to get better he started to only take what he needed he was tired of going to jail and the hospital for od ing and he had even stroked out of which my lil sister found him laying in his truck one day when she got off the bus he wasnt responding to her so my bro went over there and he had no clue who he was or what was going on for like 2 days and then he never rememberd what had happend that day or how he got inside his truck. well about 4 months after that happen he was getting better and only took what he need like i said before well he was outside mowing the lawn one day and messing around with my bro and one of his friends he had not takin any pills that day he was compleatly sober and he fell off of his mower into a lil puddle of water and just kinda shook for like 2-3 mins then my bro helped him up and he went and set in a chair still outside and he kept blaking out and kept forgetting what just happend and really didnt know were he was even though he had lived there for 10 years he really had no clue were he was so my bro freaked out and called 911 well they told my dad 911 was on the way so he got scard because he had allready been in the hospital so meny times so he ran inside the house locked everyone out and then a few mins later left the house they tryed stoping him but he kept going well my other bro live about 10 mins down the road so my bro called him and told him to look for our dad well he didnt see him going towards town but about 7 mins later he saw him heading back home well he looked at my bro and just had a blank expression on his face like he didnt know what was going on or who he was looking at and he was slumped down in his set so my bro called my other bro and told him that he should be home in about 7 mins to call when he got there well then 5 mins later the police came speeding by so my bro took off following them and there was my dad crashed right into the tree the moter was inside the cab of the truck there was no more cab of the truck all the stuff under the hood was now inside of the truck it was very very bad. what happen was there was a car behind him and they saw him shacking and then just slump over and go off the side of the road he had a sezer and crashed we dont know if he died before or after he hit the tree the sad thing is he was stoping all the pills. what happens is pain med are used to relax the body well if you take to meny you relax the heart and lungs to were they dont want to work any more. SO PLEASE BE CAREFUL AND STOP RIGHT NOW PLEASE IT HAS CAUSED A LOT OF HURT YOU DONT THINK IT WILL HAPPEN TO YOU BUT IT WILL IT HAPPENS EVERY DAY PLEASE STOP.
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The problem is when you get off Suboxen. It has a half-life twice as long as Norco. So, you'll have about 3 weeks of pur hell. Or, at least i did. i thought eveything was behind me and the taper would be a snap. i even got to 1/2 a pill a day. But, then when i went completely off the nightmare began. i hope it goes better for you.
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i did anywhere from 80mg to 160mg of oxy a day ( or what i could afford to do daily ) but in general, that is the amount i did, the main thing is wanting to quit for yourself and nobody else. its the only way.. i got by with 1/4 of a 8mg suboxone for the first 4 days then dropping down to about an 1/8 in the morning and an 1/8 of it at lunch for a couple days then just stopped... this didnt eliminate the hurt but you have to man up and understand that you did this to yourself so the hurt has to be dealt with.. having mental support from family or likewise is one of the biggest helps, just the sleeping is a pain in the ass for a little while.. one thing that helps with the suboxone is smoking weed... i know its illegal too but it is what it is.. it helps... the hurting only last for me about 5-6 days.. really only like 3 but then i get this RLS sh*t which is a pain in the ass.. again smoking trees helps with this, i would think it would help you more if your not a professional pothead like me? idk but just make sure no doctor tells you to take suboxone for the rest of your life.. this is BS.. good luck and keep strong.. also what helpd me is going out to the malls or stores that i liked and seeing all the stuff i could of bought with the money i dumped - 65$ a 80mg - 25$ a 30mg perc = mad money ( like 14,000 in a year or so ) keep your head up and stay positive, sometimes you just have to laugh at yourself for putting yourself in this perdiciment and move on with your day.. heat pads help your back too.. and like said before exercise....
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i need some help. my brother is 21 and addicted to opiates - i dont know which ones. i know he snorts oxycotin - he also got a prescription for xanex. i am so scared. i love him very much and he needs help. what do i do?
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My husband has been addicted to oxycodone for two years after a back injury. He has a lifelong battle with addiction, but is now on Suboxone. I am so fed up with the lack of motivation, lack of contribution to household responsibilities and paying of bills all alone.

How long does it take to see any change in an addicts behavior once they begin taking Suboxone? It's been two weeks and he is still not showering regularly, not working (understandable for the short period of time), and still not taking care of responsibilities. He is now smoking weed in addition to taking Suboxone, saying it helps his back. He claims up and down he is trying to recover, but I see no change. Is this just another excuse to take advantage of a situation where I take care of the bills, children, house and him....without any kind of affection or sexlife I might add!

Anybody got any input for that?! I need somebody to tell me something to give me hope that i can get my best friend and my kids' Dad back because I don't think I can hold on any longer.
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I've been an addict since about 2005. I have a history of chronic pain as well, like your husband. My addiction started innocently enough, if there is such a thing. At first it wasn't a problem to get them, as I was fresh out of surgery or in between surgeries. My doctor was prescribing Vicodin ES. He had me on 1-2 every 4-6 hours, with 1-2 refills each time. This type of medication should not be taken long term or prescribed long term, unless maybe by a pain management doctor, who will monitor your levels, try to treat your pain in every way, etc. I don't blame anyone but myself though..I mean I could have stopped taking them if I didn't need them right?? Anyway, to my point..After 6 surgeries, dozens of doctors, hundreds of pills, 2 stays at city jails for writing fake rx's out of desperation, I had to try another approach. My first time around quitting, many things were wrong: I didn't get any other help besides taking Suboxone, I wasn't 1000% honest with everyone, and I thought I could do it on my own...That landed me right back at rock bottom, only this time much faster. As someone married to an addict, you will never 100% understand his addiction, no matter how hard you try....My sister was trying to 'figure' it out, but I told her she never would. The simplest way to put it to her was this: as an addict, you don't sit down and write a pros and cons list when you make decisions. You make decisions based on what the addiction tells you to do. You don't, in other words, look at pills in one hand and your wife in the other room and decide to take the pills because you 'love' them better. An addict's life IS hell. It's not fun seeing the dissapointment and shame and misery you put your loved ones through. So, in order to numb that out, and anything else you may be dealing with, you take more until you feel ok. It gets passed feeling high. It gets to a point where you take the pills to feel like everyone else does - somewhat human/normal..



So then my second chance came. This time around, I made sure that I was honest with everyone I knew...that meant saying goodbye to anyone who would be a threat to my sobriety. That also meant that I had to tell everyone to keep asking me how I was doing, all the time, past being annoying, but keep on it! Keep asking!! Don't stop because he's taking suboxone. That's the other thing - taking suboxone with no other treatment at all would not be that helpful to some people. Myself, I went to a 5 week (had to go 4 x a week) intensive outpatient drug therapy group. Some people in addition will also go to NA or AA..you could actually go to some as well to gain more insight, or check out ALANON. But some type of drug counseling or therapy is needed, so the addict can talk to other addicts with no fear of judgement and be honest. I'm sure you offer support, but it's not the same as someone who has been there..no offense! On a side note - are you seeing him actually take the suboxone? I'm just wondering since you haven't noticed a change. And to deal with the pain issue, because that's exactly where I'm caught - I can't be in pain, but I can't touch that stuff ever again!! So see about a pain management specialist. And he has to be honest with every doctor here on out. There's ways around the pain, there are a lot of options out there. You just have to be honest, be aggressive and not give up!



So for your initial question, I'm sure everyone is different, but for me, because I was so ready to move on, my change was pretty fast. But keep in mind that he has to be ready too, and that all the things I said above hold true too. Hope this helps and hope things can get back to normal ASAP!!! Good luck!!!
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I'm very surprised I found this thread. I was looking for something completely unrelated when I stumbled upon this. Well, it just so happens that I too am an addict. This all started in mid to late 2005 and at that point I had been partying hard for years. However, OxyContin was not a drug that I felt the need to do regularly until I started hanging out with these two brothers from Indiana. If it were not for them I would have never become an addict, at least I'm quite certain of it. I am not blaming them though, it was my choice in the end and so here I am. By the way, one of those brothers Overdosed in October 2007. He was a good friend of mine, it was very shocking and I still think about it all of the time....

Anyway, I'm not going to sit here and ramble about how many pills I did in a day or how much money I spent during the height of my addiction. Details like that are unnecessary and are just "bad" stories to share to other addicts. They call it "sharing war stories", although I have certainly been guilty of telling others about myself but I'm not going to do that here.

Moving right along, after years of Oxy/Roxi addiction I found a doctor who told me about a relatively new drug for treating addiction named Suboxone. I took my first dose of Suboxone on the Summer of 2007. Life improved for me greatly after that, I became very successful, had a wonderful social life, accomplished many personal goals and had many hobbies. Now, I have been on Suboxone for a few years and honestly I do not feel as "Normal" as I did when I first started taking it. It doesn't matter how much or how little I take, I simply feel like c**p 70% of the time. On top of that, it has been hell getting my sleeping schedule back in order. I would spend long nights snorting Oxy's and that was it. I only cared for that "feeling" provided by Oxy's, at first the "high" it provided and then (as others have stated here) I was chasing that feeling of "Normalcy".

This past July, I broke my leg in a Sailing accident and had to have surgery two weeks later. I have been on crutches since July 18th and have at least 5 more weeks to go on them. Before the surgery the doctor gave me 15mg Roxicodone tablets. I didn't like the idea of having to take hardcore opiates again but I was honest with my doctors and told them that I was an addict. Regardless, the pain was immense at times and they ended up giving me the pills. In the hospital I was on Morphine but my tolerance was so high they had to switch me to Dilaudid to control the pain. After I got out of the hospital my surgeon put me on Percocet 5mg and then changed me over to Lortab 5's (yeah, I know).

This morning, after having been up all night again I sit here looking back and forth at my bottle of 60 that may have 20 left in it. I just had it filled a few days ago. This has been going on since the surgery...

I learned something important here, it doesn't matter how long you have been "clean" or on Suboxone. Once you cross that "line" that lies between sobriety and addiction then you can never go back. For the rest of your life you will always think of pills, heroin or whatever it was that you were hooked on. Suboxone or no Suboxone. Any day that is more stressful than the rest, you will think of pills, any argument with your girlfriend that pisses you off, you will think of pills. Bored at a social gathering? Pills, pills, pills....

I'm so sick of thinking about pills, I'm sick of them dictating my life. I have a choice to make here soon....

I don't need these Lortab's for pain, I'm not hurting. But since I broke my leg I had to stop taking Suboxone in order for the other Opiates to "work". I still have 30 x 8mg Suboxone tablets so I was either thinking that I would try to come off of the tabs cold turkey or go back on Suboxone. I have tried to come off of Suboxone in the past with no success. One user posted that the half-life is much longer than opiates like Lortab, Norco, etc. That is very true, so withdrawals will be longer, harder and they will exceed any expectations that one would have.

Regarding your husband, my advice is to get him off of the Suboxone as soon as possible. He needs to be completely Opiod free in order to transfer into his normal self. Even then, it may take months or years for that to happen. Opiate addiction is especially traumatic. Just because one stops taking pills or smack for a while doesn't mean that everything is ok. As for the pain, that's tough, maybe Advil or something?

I was wondering, does anyone else have problems going to sleep and waking up on a normal schedule since they have been on Suboxone or other opiates? I am wondering if it is just me of if my addiction is causing these problems.

Thanks for listening!

PAINguin
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Hello all! I am new to this thread and to the idea of a support group for this issue at all. I have been taking hydrocodone for about 5 years. I never really took more than 4-7 per day and 10mg/325apap most recent dosing.I ran out of medication on Friday and it is now Sunday.I am not going through the trouble of finding a Doctor to prescribe me Subox and the reason why is I feel like from what I have read that you are giving up one drug addcition for another one.I admitt it is hard and I feel bad not terrible but bad. If your reading this you know the usual symptoms. I have decided to take some old fashioned psuedoephedrine for the nasal issues ,so far so good with that.The body aches and pains are not as bad for me as I have been hearing on this thread. I suppose everyone is different. I take a Kolonipin for sleep at night and then get up and take the sinus pills in the am. I have been having the urge to get a refill this week but I don't think I am going to. I feel like life sometimes forces us into painful situation because we only grow emotionally and spiritually when we are out fo our comfort zone.I really feel like I am the one in controll of me and my body so, I can't say I have allowed the opiates take over my life. I may just continue my abstenance from them to see how I feel with out the meds. Good Luck to all and God Bless you and fill your lives with joy!
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The Suboxone detox clinic can help facilitate a lot of worthwhile programs and group seminar gatherings for the health and well-being of all those addicted to narcotic opiate medication and wishing to remain drug free. Drug addiction, like alcoholism, is a disease and needs to be addressed for the rest of the addict’s life, which is why it is prudent advice, if you have made the decision to quit abusing opiates, to find a clinic in your area and make it your base central for all your needs related to staying and remaining drug free.
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MY NAME IS MICAH, AND IVE BEEN ADDICTED TO OPIATES FOR A FEW YEARS NOW. im 23 years old., and i think it all started when i was 17 or so. i started just smoking weed accasionally. then everyday with friends or alone. and i kind of relied on it everynight. but i slowly decided i didnt want it to be part of my life forever . so i quit. i was moody m,aybe. but that was it. very easy. and i still smome occasionally. but anyways. i think i didnt start seriously abusing drugs untill i was 20 or so. i was going thru a very bad breakup and i just didnmt care anymore. i started taking acid alot and and smoking. and i worked with aguy who sold pills. id take anything from him. mainly xanex and somas. id take them at work at home. whenever. i didnt care. id sometimes take ectasy also. but i didnt start taking pain pills till a year or so later. they were always available. from the same guy whop sold me somas and xanex, but they used to give me headaches. so i stayed away from them., well eventually i started trying them a little bit more often. and i liked the high, but would quickly get a headache. this waqs when i was just taking one. my seriuos girlfriend at the time. had a miscariage. and had to have a surgery and was prescribed tylox. i think thats basicly oxycodone. very strong. well me being used to taking all kinds of pills. started taking a few,. she had a lot of them. they were so amazing. no headache,. just felt euphoria and very social, and they were in capsules. so i would pour the powder out and snort them,. it was amaizing high,. my wife only used 8 or 9 of them. so i finished off the rest. after that i think i was kinda hooked. i started seeking out pain pills. and taking more than one at a time. and enjoying the high i got off of them, also my wife got a prescr. for tramadol. an angeslic opiate,. not as strong. but if u take like 5 at a time. u feeeel so high for like 12 hours. so i woul;d take those. and a knew anothe rguy who could get those reg. cause ihis mom had a script for her athrirtius. but when those all ran out. from my now wife and the guy i know. well his mom died. rip. so i couldnt get those anymore. i experiened the worst restkless leg syndrom, and i couldnt sleep at all at night. so i started buying vicodin from a lady i knew. and it helped the R.L.S. very much and made me feel good. and i didnt get headaches anymore. i had no desire for somas or anything. not even weed anymore. all i wanted was pain pills. i would take 5 or 6 at night. and it felt so good. but my bank account started hurting and my wife started noticing. i wasnt havning enough money to pay all the bills and etc. so she started checking my account and saw how much i was spending. and was very upset. so i kept trying to stop. like just one night off of them. i felt so sad. and moooody and angry and didnt want to be toiched. and she couldnt understabnd how miserable i felt. it was the worst nigthj of my life. so the next morning i had to score just a few pain pills. and i realized i was truly hooked on these damn things. all the things i toook. and pian pills are the most addictive. i know its def. my own fault. their just always available and so easy to get,. just so very expensive..... anyways. we have been trying to save up some money and still pay off my car note. and im tired of feeling so bad and sad about putting her thru all of this. i need to man up and quit this. because we have bills to pay and thinsg we want. so i started weening off the pain pills. well i took. 3 one night. then 1, and a valium. yes i was told valium or xanex help alot. so i boigh 10. and last night i didnt take any pian pills but 2 valiums. i feel a little weird. and ircky. and kinda RLS./ but its not unbearable. s and today i actallu feel pretty ok. so ill take 2 valiums tonight. then 2 more, then maybe one, and i think it should be out my sysytem. atleast all the physical withdrawl symptoms. im ofcourse going to miss the high of opiatess... but something come with too large og a pricce. to really even the odds. ,,, so hopefully i change my ways for myself. im tired of wanting and needing and looking..for more highs. and time to just live life.
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I hate to say it, but the worst is to come. Suboxone only helps someone get over the withdrawal of the opiate. The suboxone withdrawal is much worse.
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Have you heard about Ibogaine? My son was addicted to opiates for eight years, from the time he was 19 until 27. He was treated with Ibogaine and is now not only completely free of his addiction, but experienced no withdrawals at all. It is also a spiritual experience. It is illegal in the US and also Belgium, but is legal in all other countries. My son got addicted to oxycontin, but after two years and almost dead, he came to me and admitted it. He detoxed on his own, but still struggled, so went on Methadone and was on that for the last six years. He was very lucky to have gotten off of the horrible stuff. Any questions, please ask. You can do your own research about Ibogaine online. There is lots of information on youtube.
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