i had an abortion in Feb 2009 and all i can say is that its the worst thing that i ever did in my whole life. i found out that i was pregnant when my visa to Germany was about to expire and my boyfriend though 33 years told me openly that he was not ready to be a dad (it pained so much cos he is a dad to 7 year old boy). since am here alone i had nobody where i could turn to ...keeping my baby was the first priority that i had but twas not possible. i remember the abortion day i woke up at 6 am and had nothing to eat cos i had to have an empty stomach before the operation. my partner just woke and watched me dress and i finally left the house i cried all the way to the hospital and wondered why i ever was in a relationship with him. my whole process took 45 minutes and then later at 3 pm he came to pick me up. what really eats me up is the guilt of having killed my own flesh and blood, ever single day i cry and pray that God would forgive me for having killed. when the due date reached i told my partner that our child could be born today but told me that he is tired of hearing the baby saga all the time.
i wish that one day all be able to move on!!! cos all i feel for my partner is only hate and the worst thing is that deep down i cant forgive him for having forced me to do away my baby.