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Ever since I started to have sex, my penis seems to go limp sooner than when I am ready to ejaculate. I have never been able to stay hard during oral, although I started out that way. In sex with my wife I am hard in the beginning but go soft too soon. When I masterbate with my hand and lubricant, when I start touching my head it goes soft, yet when I stroke the rest of the shaft prior, it stays hard. Not sure what this means other than a questionable ability to stay in the game. Any thoughts doc's? (when I was younger I masterbated with a pillow...do you think this had any affect on my challenge?)

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I'm a 20yo, U/cir and I have been having this exact same issue! I have been looking around for answers everywhere! I have been told it's Phimosis, but my foreskin isn't tight. That it'll go away eventually... it's now been 7 years. Even that it's phychological and to start viagra/cialis. (Still doesnt address sensitivity). I've tried keeping my foreskin back to decrease sensitivity, it wont stay retracted, and it's not long, so I dont understand how that works. So I'm currently considering "Betamethasone Valerate Creme". It's a topical coricosteroid that should thin the glans skin (head) of the penis and reduce the sensitivity slightly, prescribed by my doctor.
I find this condition really distressing because when I was younger I could handle oral sex and masturbation with my foreskin fully retracted. Now I can barely stand it at all. I can't maintain an erection for very long (if at all), so I'm never fully rigid. And the main point of all, I can't enjoy sex as much as I used to, because orgasm is far from satisfactory if I even have one at all.
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I'm having a lot of the same problems. I'm not able to stay hard when I'm trying to have sex, and often become too uncomfortable before becoming inserted in a girl causing me to go soft. As for the cream, I'm going to assume that you need to get a doctor to prescribe it?
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You can find creams that desensitize the head and make it take longer before you ejaculate. Pre-mature ejaculation is common in young guys when they first start having sex. Most sites that sell sex toys, will have this cream, but a prescription one is probably safer. You may also try wearing a penis ring. these come in different materials from leather to stainless steel. They are not one size fits all, the leather ones are usually adjustable because they have snaps. Some use rubber band or something similar, which is much worse on your skin and cause irritation. This will help maintain an erection, by keeping blood in the penis keeping it hard, but not address the sensitivity. Guys sometimes are super sensitive once they have cum, and can't stand to have it touched. This is sort of the opposite of your problem, being sensitive before. Take it slow, it is better for you if it is sensitive, than doing something and loosing the sensitivity. The area at the top underside of your penis is usually where you get more stimulation, so avoiding the top will work when masturbating, but not during sex. Do you wear a condom? if not try it, or even put on a second condom, this may be enough that you are not having as much sensitivity.
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