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HI im new to this site. I am 21 years old and a college student, and i have suffered with HEAVY anxiety for the last 2 years.

I read a few posts on this section and it seems that a lot of the people experiencing anxiety here tend to worry that someone is watching them or so, more like paranoia..
My problem is not so much that Im paranoid, I just have a very difficult time being around people. Often my eyes get locked, almost like i have no control of what I look at... idont understand it. For instance, if im sitting in my class before the class actually starts, i dont know where to look, or I feel so anxious that my eyes dart around the room... so often i put my headdown to act like im sleeping or tired.. I also have a big problem making eye contact with people, or even just the regular face-face conversation... its something i cant explain, but the anxiety is off the charts sometimes...

sometimes it gets so bad that I really dont want to live, i mean if i cant even be social then i'd rather die than be in isolation forever... anyhow, it really sucks, and im not suicidal, I just want to show how extreme it can be.
Even being around a family member or a close friend can be weird, my eyes often "lock" up, (i dont know a better word for it).

can anyone relate to this? if not can anyone please try to imagine what it would be like not being able to talk to people on a regular basis.. I need help, and i dont think there is medication that can help the type of anxiety I have...

advice? please..

anything

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oh my god. you are the only other person that i have even heard to have this problem. nobody knows what its like to not be able to be social with other people, with other friends. i don't want to be this way forever. i want to have a fun, fulfilling life with tons of people in it...but i can't even look people in the eye... its so wierd, i'll tell you to what extreme...in the elevator, or when anyone is remotely close to me...in a room... down the hall..anywhere in sight of me...my eyes start to dart around. i feel as if they will judge me for how paranoid i become. and i get an intense feeling of FEAR. but i can't stop myself from keeping my eye on them...which is wierd because i can't even make eye contact...but the whole time, i'm watching them. so i try to stare (unsuccessfully) at something else...if i can, i'll turn my back...i'll try to remain normal, but i just can't ... until they leave. i feel like i'm crazy! but i'm only 24! and i have my whole life ahead of me! i don't want to be this way :-( but i don't know how to fix it either. so i'm soooo glad that you might actually have this same problem...(actually it sucks that u have this problem) but we can talk if you want some support, and maybe we can find a solution together! :-)
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My dear friends...this is amol from india....

I would like to tell u that I also faced the same problem as u described.....same tremendous anxious feelings....eyes locking....unable to stay calm...etc.. all that.

But now all these symptoms are under control. And both of u no need to worry so much about it bcoz it happens with everyone but feelings are not as much intense as we felt.

But slowly with understanding all these feelings come to settle down. For this u need to analyse ur past that 1st time when it happend.

For me it was bcoz of masterbation. I felt so much bad and guilty and shamefull that I would consider myself baddest of all.
So started the social anxity that people are looking at me...staring at me for me being so bad boy....I look ugly...I am foolish....etc..etc..

And slowly slowly this anxiousnes grew in me. I was just unabe to talk to my friends too and unable to look in their eyes.
There was no way to talk to any strangers and specially girls.

Tremendous block minded feelings....anxiousness...eyes locking problem....and complete black-outs..etc. I can understand all that.

I suffered it for almost 3-4 yrs. without telling any one. But recently it was just unbearable. So I told everything to my mother and cried very much. I really felt good as if got lightened from heavy load.

Then I analysed my problem well. I realized that I did nothing wrong and whatever I did was completly natural and normal.

All those things happened to me bcoz it was only me who abused myself and no one other else. It was only my misunderstanding.
Then got calm and looked at myself and found that really I am a good person just like any other one else.

And u too my friends are really good persons like ur friends...and its only the misunderstanding that u are bad...not good...cant talk or cant behave normally etc...

Get cool its absolutly alright outside and u too ok. Nothing is wrong just give urself now more credit.....stay normal...natural...and happy. It doesnt matter what others say...u know that u r a good person and its true. So dont worry be happy...stay cool and keep rocking now like me..bye....
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Hey you guys,

I can't believe that I have found others with the same descripition for what I have been experiencing. I understand the guilt/shame feeling that Amol decribed even when you have done nothing to make you feel like that. But bboysiren's experience matches mine to a tee. I am also a college student (late 30's) and have mentioned the "not knowing where to look" thing to one or two people that are close to me. It is almost like a beast that feeds upon itself, because the more you try to tell yourself to be comfortable and relaxed, the more awkward it makes you feel. There is always that constant worry of "What if someone sees my eyes darting around, or me looking from the side of my eyes. They will think I'm crazy" There is the constant fear of looking like an Oddball in a group of people and then that causes more anxiety! So, hopefully this makes you feel a little better bboysiren cuz your not the only one, Dude! Maybe we all should have some type of online meeting place to share advice, help, and experiences like Yahoo Groups or something.
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8-| hi everyone, well where do i start i know all to well about these websites,becausing everynow and agin i visit one, just when i think yes this is me, its back.......MY PROBLEM ,started when i was at mass 4 yrs ago,this woman started to satreat me? ok,but for some reason my HEAD SHUCK,,,,,,,. i turned away through the rest of mass 5mins in totaland couldnt bring myself to look foward..... so a mixturea school problems and life problems i.e. a boyfriend at 14 secret for year,,,,and stilwith at 21.....jealousgirls ect alllead to me avoiding things such aseatingin thecanteen, going to meals with family, going to crowded places,,,,eventually i developed a fear ofa twitch,, this twitch hardly ever happened but it was the tense feeling that, what if..that stopped me from doing what i wanted,,,,i startedto use props to cover it up and every ady i wore abaseball cap,,,,even in the class room at the (tec)......if someone was a sked a question besideme i would feelso nervous that pepople wherelooking at me,,,i even lied that i wasgoing to school and eventually got caught,,andleft, formbeing so confident to not even being able to finish art, and i wouldnt be back at school now,i would be in uni...all becauseof a fear that i would twitch again,,,,,but i found strenght and took my cap of and started to walk aroubdthe town on my own, eventaully it became normal....but a yr later it came back,i stopped going up the town as much and now ihave a car i feel imnever out of it always yaking short cuts and neb=ver walking, i feel anixious in facing rows of trafficeven though sometimes imfine,i feel worse in my home town because u feel people know u there, and yes i have had a jerking movmnet so it eventually came out, but nver happens in my own company just whrn i feel people arelooking at me,,,,,its so annoying and holds me back,, i just boughta property to devlop,im at schoola and a part time job, but i dnt feellucky because it ahs turned to depression,i cant smile sometimes i ahve to force it all the bulit up anxity just turned to depression, i dnt knw weather itcould be a medical thing but i do know i would love to meet up with an anxious person because i feel im the only on with it....
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8-| hi everyone, well where do i start i know all to well about these websites,becausing everynow and agin i visit one, just when i think yes this is me, its back.......MY PROBLEM ,started when i was at mass 4 yrs ago,this woman started to straight at me? ok,but for some reason my HEAD SHUCK,,,,,,,. i turned away through the rest of mass 5mins in total and couldnt bring myself to look foward..... so a mixturea school problems and life problems i.e. a boyfriend at 14 secret for year,,,,and stilwith at 21.....jealousgirls ect alllead to me avoiding things such aseatingin thecanteen, going to meals with family, going to crowded places,,,,eventually i developed a fear ofa twitch,, this twitch hardly ever happened but it was the tense feeling that, what if..that stopped me from doing what i wanted,,,,i startedto use props to cover it up and every ady i wore abaseball cap,,,,even in the class room at the (tec)......if someone was a sked a question besideme i would feelso nervous that pepople wherelooking at me,,,i even lied that i wasgoing to school and eventually got caught,,andleft, formbeing so confident to not even being able to finish art, and i wouldnt be back at school now,i would be in uni...all becauseof a fear that i would twitch again,,,,,but i found strenght and took my cap of and started to walk aroubdthe town on my own, eventaully it became normal....but a yr later it came back,i stopped going up the town as much and now ihave a car i feel imnever out of it always yaking short cuts and neb=ver walking, i feel anixious in facing rows of trafficeven though sometimes imfine,i feel worse in my home town because u feel people know u there, and yes i have had a jerking movmnet so it eventually came out, but nver happens in my own company just whrn i feel people arelooking at me,,,,,its so annoying and holds me back,, i just brought a property to develop,im at school and a part time job, but i dnt feellucky because it ahs turned to depression,i cant smile sometimes i ahve to force it all the bulit up anxity just turned to depression, i dnt knw weather itcould be a medical thing but i do know i would love to meet up with an anxious person because i feel im the only on with it....
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yaa...we should have an online discussion for the problem we are facing....it will really help...

Anyways...now as knowing the fact that we are not alone to face all this...dont worry and be happy...try to stay cool...

**edited by moderator ** e-mails not allowed **
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At last, I have found other people who share my burden. I thought it was just me who was Ill!

I know exactly how you all feel as this Anxiety/Paranoia whatever you want to call it is ruining my life.

Bboy described everything that I am going through, then when I read further down I related to the "driving everywhere and even feeling uncomfortable with other drivers" - its very strange.

Also - I used to be a VERY confident person and now I dont feel confident at all - I actually feel scared sometimes. Especially in crowded places i.e down town.

I feel this twice as bad if I am tired or feel a bit rough - it seems to take a grip twice as bad - I noticed that no-one has posted on here for a while so I hope someone reads this as it would be really nice to talk to someone who is going through the same thing as me.
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Can anyone PLEASE tell me how to get over this problem... the eye locking thing. It seems like i dont know where to look. Like i'll be sitting in class, and i notice that people look around naturally and have normal instincts... but when i try to i look like a goof ball... I need HELP ........medication??????????
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Hey was woundering if anyone suffers from anxiety due to going bald? cheers
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