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Hey, I am Matt,and 15 yo. I had a cavernoma removed from my brain stem when I was 12. I was pretty much a vegetible after that, but now I am physically built; however, I have a bit lack in accuracy in motor gfunctions and I dont walk perfect (ussually around congested/packed areas).

This is the first time Im actually acknowledging my problem to people.

I take a sleep aid and a behavioral drug, zoloff. I still have anxiety attacks and i feel anti-socioal, but i want to be socialable. But, I refuse to take drugs that may effect my brain function. I sometimes tearup, when talking to an un charasmatic superior. (childish?)
before masturbating....
What do you guys suggest?

Also, this is kinda weird but I like sex (masturbation =() Do yo think because of walking and eveerything,I wont be able to get a gf? If, legally, i cant walk by myself in school, how do you suggest I attempt to approach?

What is the likelihood that a girl with me, will like to express love?

Im not sure if this is the right thread. I mean my life is so f#####d up, and im only 15. Ive been reading around this forum and I feel so excluded, so distraught from the average normality of an adolescence.

By the way, I did submit this in another thread,m but I have a feeling it didnt submit.

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You sound like a really nice guy, and to be completely honest with you kids (including teens) can be very mean. Not to get your hopes down but it may be hard to find a girl right around your age who will like you for you (not all just physically but mentally and emotionally) but it's not impossible. So many girls would love to meet a guy like you because you sound like you have a really big heart. But don't stress yourself over finding a girl because the right girl will come to you. I'm the type of girl that doesn't just go based off looks/appearance.... I'm a really big personality type of person. But just be confident in yourself and if you still feel that it'll be a little hard for you then just become friends with that girl first and move in from there because she'll see the loveable person that you are... good luck and let me know how everything goes.
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Hey Matt,
Well, it definitely seems to me like you are going through puberty just as everyone your age does. There is not a boy your age that isn’t concerned about new things he is experiencing, girls and sex. How long have you been taking Zoloft? If it has been for a while and it doesn’t seem to do anything positive about anxiety or social issues than there are other options – maybe some counseling could make the difference.
There is nothing weird about you liking masturbation – there isn’t a person in the world that doesn’t. It’s just a regular thing all people do.
And Jay is absolutely right - other kids can be mean (you probabbly figured out that yourself), but not everyone are. There always are girls who won't focus on your walking. How is it going on in school, besides girls :-)?
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thank you jay

nikolic, thanks aalso. Ive been taking Zoloft for two years, i dont think it does much. But, I dont wanna take something that'll mess with my brain function. I try my hardest in school, I have a B in everything, except, a C in math.

By the way, it feels good talking about this with you guys.
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I was more thinking that maybe a few sessions with someone who will listen to you would probably do you more good than Zoloft. I understand completely why you don’t want to take any medication that would have effect on your brain functions and the fact is that for issues like social anxiety more help comes from other people than medications. Can you talk with your school counselor? Maybe he/she can recommend someone?
And how do you get along with others in your class?
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I would talk to someone, but it feels weird coming out after everyone thought i was fine. It feels weird talking to my counselor or something. I am funny n, only if i feel comfortable. Like in class, I get scared to start a conversation, butn if theyu start with me; Its great, and i feel combfortable with them forever. My english teacher, for some reason, gets me scared. Like thre way she approaches me. Thats one of the reasons I wanted a girlfriend, who I coould just talk to.I am also super scared about presenting a speech with my John Lennon research paper.

(If youre wondering what grade I have in English-- a B)
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I feel the same, I'm not a doctor, but if the meds are not doing what they're suppose to then what's the point in continuing taking them (but that's just an opinion). Anyways you are @ the age where puberty is starting to kick in, so of course you're beganing to become interested in girls. I agree with nikols, maybe you should find a professional that you could talk to one-on-one to help you with your social skills but a lot of that has to do with self-esteem and confidence. Try working on that, thinking the best of youself and believing that you can do it and it is bound to happen. Girls like guys that are confident in themselves. But yeah, try finding some one that you feel comfortable talking to about what's on your mind, that could be the start to you just becoming a social fanatic lol. But yeah just believe in yourself, honestly I don't know you personally, only what you've posted, but from what you've said I believe in you because in a way you're already being sociable by talking to us on here. So good luck Matt and keep us updated on how things are going. P.S. There's nothing weird about masturbating, it's perfectly normal and especially more frequent in your age group.
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I love talking to you guys and feels great. You guys make even me feel great, even though im crying =). See I never talk to people in school about myself, I just try making them laugh. if i am actually talking to them.
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I'm glad we make you feel comfortable enough to open up. It's a lot easier to talk to strangers who knows nothing about you and won't judge you. And you say instead of talking, you make others laugh. That could be your breakthrough. Using your humor is social. U sound like an amazing guy, just work on being you and everything will come naturally.... and if you ever need someone to talk to you can inbox me by clicking on the yellow box beside my name.
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Thanks,, youre a great person. I will try being as social ass i can. I start from holiday break this Monday.

feels great... haha

If you dont mind, can you tell me about yourselves.
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Yeah I don't mind given a lil info... I'm a female, 17, athlete, honor student, 5"5'.. 125 lbs, Scorpio.... what about yourself.
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Im 15. I design graphics in photoshop. ***edited by moderator*** web addresses not allowed
I work out on a daily basis, i weigh 129. Im around 5'' 6'. I like learning to modify executables and code. In school, I think im super close to the honor roll,i think its called. I am a Leo and reside in Philadelphia.

i am feeling more confident while doing this

Its great to hear your an honor student; its wonderful youreathletic, you said soccer, right? soccer is awesome

Youre an amazing girl. =)
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lol volleyball... and i love working out too especially running n the fresh air... im a big believer that staying n shape is very important... and thanx... i lyk to feel that I'm a great person... it means a lot to me to b able to help people and make them happy
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well you certainly did, thanx

volleyball is awesome too, yes its definitely important to have good physical health.

i was just thinking that i sometimes get depressed from like tv, school. i read romeo and Juliet last year and that got me all bummed out.

i think im the only guy that just wants to lay with a girl, under the cool night sky. Starring at the moon. You know? nice peaceful, relaxing
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There's nothing wrong with being emotional.... we like that believe it or not. It's nice to have someone that is physically and mentally strong but they dnt have to b a rock all the time... it's good for guys to show emotion and b sensitive to their girl's emotions and feelings... it's good that ur not the type that just want to get with a girl to get in their pants.
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