Hi, I am the age of 16 years old, and i have been smoking marijuana for about 3-4 years now. Just these past 1-2 years I have been noticing dramatic changes in my behavior, and I cant tell if its from marijuana use or not. I have done some research, but some of this information tells me that each marijuana user experiences different effects. Basically, i would like to know if I am fully addicted, or if I just need to control my usage.
Since grade 10, all day at school I would look forward to coming home to smoke up and relax. Due to my usage after school I would sometimes not even consider opening my school bag to do school work, other times I would think about it and just end up not doing it anyway. Due to lack of motivation to do my homework and studies, my grades started to suffer a great amount. And due to these poor grades, my mother really started to get on my case about it. I would lie and tell her I'm trying now, and that my grades were starting to get better, then sooner or later a progress report would come, and my mom would just be extremely upset. I tell her my grades are suffering due to just sheer laziness.
Eventually, as she would come home from work, I would be passed out on the couch with a stack of plates in front of me on the counter in the pitch black. During dinner time I wouldn't be hungry, and often end up eating a few hours after dinner, she started to notice my eating patterns were changing. As well, i would have sudden mood swings during my burn out, then be fully awake after wards, then relying on marijuana to put me to sleep.
Recently I have been skipping a lot of class and going to a buddies house to smoke up and have a good time. Then this whole process would occur again. All of this would lead to arguments with my mom on a weekly bases leaving me to be extremely mad and relying on marijuana to calm me down and relieve my stress. I really do care about my grades and my future career. I feel as if ever since I started smoking on the regular my life has been going downhill, I feel depressed almost every day now about my life and just end up smoking up again to forget. My moods fluctuate a significant amount. I really want to change, but it just feels impossible. I try to find some thing to do instead of smoking but the need to smoke is just irritable.
Might I add the crowd I hang around aren't the best of the bunch. They are into harsher drugs as well, and lots of criminal and gang activity. I would say I am the most level headed of the bunch, so my surrounding environment is not helping me what so ever. They do not aspire to do anything with their lives, where is I do. I have a girlfriend that I have had for about 3 years now, she notices the transitions in my mood when I am sober, and when I smoke up. I often come home from school quite aggravated, and I get mad at her about the tiniest things.
Overall guys, I am quite worried about my health, and my future career and life. I really want to change, if it really means stopping marijuana I will. But if there is maybe a way I can control my marijuana use, I would greatly appreciate it. I do know people who are very successful in school and their career whom smoke marijuana on a daily bases, but I am not them.
A solution I have came across were to, use marijuana as a motivational thing as in, when I come home from school, I MUST get all my work done before enjoying myself. It seems logical, and obvious, yet it just seems so hard for me to do. I really want to do better, but the motivation is just not there. Anyone have suggestions?
BACKGROUND INFO:
A weird thing is after all of this, I find myself to be NOT lazy at the same time, I constantly keep my surroundings neat, clean, and organized, and find myself to be a neat freak. I am a dancer as well, I enjoy more hip hop oriented styles of dance. I catch onto concepts really fast, I am in ALL university courses at school, my teachers say I'm really respectful, but they say I just do not do my work. Coming from a Chinese family, my parents really expect a lot from me. Although we aren't your typical kind of family, we are a different kind of Chinese, and we are able to adapt to our surroundings really quick. My brother is a known DJ around the country, my other brother is an animator and has worked on many movies that many of us have seen in the theaters, they are both marijuana users as well. My mom is a successful vice president of accounting in a large company, my dad did drop out of high school and does work in a factory, but I respect him, he makes a honest and legit living. My life seems made, yet... I keep screwing things up. We are a typical middle-class family that started from nothing, and became some thing. Currently residing in Toronto, Canada.
Since grade 10, all day at school I would look forward to coming home to smoke up and relax. Due to my usage after school I would sometimes not even consider opening my school bag to do school work, other times I would think about it and just end up not doing it anyway. Due to lack of motivation to do my homework and studies, my grades started to suffer a great amount. And due to these poor grades, my mother really started to get on my case about it. I would lie and tell her I'm trying now, and that my grades were starting to get better, then sooner or later a progress report would come, and my mom would just be extremely upset. I tell her my grades are suffering due to just sheer laziness.
Eventually, as she would come home from work, I would be passed out on the couch with a stack of plates in front of me on the counter in the pitch black. During dinner time I wouldn't be hungry, and often end up eating a few hours after dinner, she started to notice my eating patterns were changing. As well, i would have sudden mood swings during my burn out, then be fully awake after wards, then relying on marijuana to put me to sleep.
Recently I have been skipping a lot of class and going to a buddies house to smoke up and have a good time. Then this whole process would occur again. All of this would lead to arguments with my mom on a weekly bases leaving me to be extremely mad and relying on marijuana to calm me down and relieve my stress. I really do care about my grades and my future career. I feel as if ever since I started smoking on the regular my life has been going downhill, I feel depressed almost every day now about my life and just end up smoking up again to forget. My moods fluctuate a significant amount. I really want to change, but it just feels impossible. I try to find some thing to do instead of smoking but the need to smoke is just irritable.
Might I add the crowd I hang around aren't the best of the bunch. They are into harsher drugs as well, and lots of criminal and gang activity. I would say I am the most level headed of the bunch, so my surrounding environment is not helping me what so ever. They do not aspire to do anything with their lives, where is I do. I have a girlfriend that I have had for about 3 years now, she notices the transitions in my mood when I am sober, and when I smoke up. I often come home from school quite aggravated, and I get mad at her about the tiniest things.
Overall guys, I am quite worried about my health, and my future career and life. I really want to change, if it really means stopping marijuana I will. But if there is maybe a way I can control my marijuana use, I would greatly appreciate it. I do know people who are very successful in school and their career whom smoke marijuana on a daily bases, but I am not them.
A solution I have came across were to, use marijuana as a motivational thing as in, when I come home from school, I MUST get all my work done before enjoying myself. It seems logical, and obvious, yet it just seems so hard for me to do. I really want to do better, but the motivation is just not there. Anyone have suggestions?
BACKGROUND INFO:
A weird thing is after all of this, I find myself to be NOT lazy at the same time, I constantly keep my surroundings neat, clean, and organized, and find myself to be a neat freak. I am a dancer as well, I enjoy more hip hop oriented styles of dance. I catch onto concepts really fast, I am in ALL university courses at school, my teachers say I'm really respectful, but they say I just do not do my work. Coming from a Chinese family, my parents really expect a lot from me. Although we aren't your typical kind of family, we are a different kind of Chinese, and we are able to adapt to our surroundings really quick. My brother is a known DJ around the country, my other brother is an animator and has worked on many movies that many of us have seen in the theaters, they are both marijuana users as well. My mom is a successful vice president of accounting in a large company, my dad did drop out of high school and does work in a factory, but I respect him, he makes a honest and legit living. My life seems made, yet... I keep screwing things up. We are a typical middle-class family that started from nothing, and became some thing. Currently residing in Toronto, Canada.
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Honestly, from a purely objective standpoint... it is clear that you are answering your own question.
You said, "I do know people who are very successful in school and their career whom smoke marijuana on a daily bases, but I am not them." I guess the decision must be up to you. Do you want to be a
In my opinion, you should say, "No Ifs / Ands / Or / Buts, I am going to quit smoking." It is clearly causing many negative things in your life. Maybe in future years you will be able to control it, but you clear cannot do that at such a young age. Trust me from someone who has smoked before, it will be detrimental to your life if you cannot control it. Nothing is terribly bad in small doses, but doing it on a "daily basis" is not "control."
You can do better Jeremy, I believe in ya buddy.
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