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SUMMARY:
In the beginning, I thought he was nothing but a joke-a wanna-be player. Despite that, I found him attractive on many levels. The more we hung out, the more I realized how strangely alike we both were. Naturally, we grew attached to each other.. After a while of us hanging out and getting to know each other, I began to think of him in a different way; the world had it's option on him, but so did I... I was able to look beyond his past, beyond his mistakes... I was able to see his potential as a person. Later, I really fell for him; everything felt so wrong when we were apart...and the moment he was in my presence, I felt like everything was okay-which is quite ironic because us being together was considered a big no no. I wish I could have provided for him like SHE did...because then, he would have ended up with me... He always told me that he thought so much more of me than he did of her, and I always believed him... I thought that if I could give him everything I had to give, maybe he would start to consider me as the "better choice", even with his given situation. I have given him my mind, body, and soul...but I guess that was never enough for him…

DID I MENTION?
He's homeless. His parents don't care about him and refuse to take him back. He used to be really into drugs, now he just does them once in a while.. But he drinks all the time. He can't get a job because he has nowhere to start, and nothing to start with.. She gave him a place to stay and provided for him. They're dating now. He doesn't want her though, he says he wants me, but he can't break up with her because then he will have no place to go.

YOU SHOULD KNOW:
We may have a lot in common, but I am nothing like him. He relies on others to take care of him. He lives his life like there is nothing wrong because he pretends that everything is okay, even though it's clear that he is in a horrible position. I am educated enough to understand that what he is doing/the way he is living is WRONG. I know how to take responsibility and deal with my issues. While he sat in their apartments playing video games all day (while she worked two jobs), I went out and got my license and a job. I've tired to help him figure out what to do with his life, but he hates when I "preach" to him because he's "19 and I'm 16, and he knows more about life than me" (says him).

At this point, I don't know what to do.

He has put me through sh*t, but we are too prefect for each other.
Despite what he has done, or the mistakes he is making, I can still see his potential as a person.. But no one else can see that. EVERYONE tells me that I am stupid for even liking him. I am scolded by my older sister every single time I mention his name.. Him and I... We are so alike, in so many ways. Our only difference is our lifestyles.

So here's my quandary:
I care about him-I love him, and I think I am in love with him (but I can never be sure; can't trust these damn teenage hormones.) But he is no good. But he makes me happy. But he hurts me. But I know he doesn’t mean to. But he could be lying. But why would be lie to me? Why would he put so much effort just to have sex with me? We have had sex, and that didn’t change anything between us, he still cares about me, as I do for him… But I feel stupid for putting myself in this position…

I took him out of my life for time now.
I’m wondering if I should take him back.
I am so sad that we don’t see each other all the time.
I think about him ALL THE TIME.

Advice? (and please, don’t lecture me and make me feel dumber for being in this situation. I would have never thought I would allow myself to go through this..)

Anything you have to say will help me decide what I need to do, because ultimately, it’s my decision…

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I'm not going to lecture you, but I want to tell you my story.

When I was 16, there was this amazing guy in my life. Unfortunately, he wasn't mine. I liked him a lot but I knew he was off limits. His girlfriend accused me of trying to get with him which was totally wrong on her part. Anyway, after he broke up with her, he found a new girlfriend and it wasn't me. He still flirted with me and tried to do stuff with me and whatnot. He told me that he and his girlfriend weren't doing so great and when they broke up, he was going to be mine. FINALLY!! I thought... He and his girlfriend did not break up, but he and I did end up having sex. I gave him my virginity because I thought he really cared about me. He finally broke up with his girlfriend. We had sex a couple of times after that and then he left. I felt REALLY stupid!!

What I'm trying to say is that if he "says" he likes you better, then he would be with you. I don't know you and I don't know him, but it honestly seems like you are just a booty call.

You should forget about being with him, but not forget him as a friend. I'm sure you can find someone who is more responsible and more fit for you. You don't need someone who does drugs--even occassionally--or drinks all the time. You need someone who is going to make something of himself. You seem like a very smart girl and I know that you know you can find better.

Good luck in you decision-making, hun!!

I hope I've helped, even if it's just a little!!

--LinZ
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Thank you for telling me your story.
It has helped me realize something..

I realized that if he cheated on his girlfriend with me without hesitation, who's to say he won't cheat on me with the next girl he finds attractive?

The other day, I decided to talk with him (in person) for the first time in a while.. Turns out he hasn't changed a bit. He knows exactly how I feel about the "situation" but he has yet to change is ways. Although he will never know how much I care about him, I think I need to take him out of my life until I can be around him as just a friend-and nothing more.

I fear the day that him and his girlfriend (my ex best friend due to the "situation") break up because he will be homeless-he explained to me that when that day comes, he'll probably turn himself in, as in, he will go to jail and serve his time for having three warrents out for his arrest.. (No, he didn't do anything too bad)

I always search for the good in people, but quite frankly, the good in him is clouded by dishonesty. I was used, but up until now, I was too afraid to admit that I was just a pawn in his little game. I am sickened by how much he has gotten me to do for him. I cannot believe I gave him my mind and body (he took my virginity)-he doesn't deserve me, I can do so much better. And the good thing is, I have the rest of my life to find someone special, so there's no hurry now..
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YOU GO GIRL!! I'm so very proud of you!!

--LinZ
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