My boyfriend and I have good sex. When we first started dating it seriously took to me what felt like a long time for him to be done. I am small and long periods of sex in the end just makes it painful and I do not stay lubricated for long. He does seem worried that he does not want to hurt me. Could this be causing him to take forever? He seems to be more into foreplay than anything. In the middle of our relationship he was getting off quicker and sex was amazing. By me saying quicker I am not meaning 5 minutes. Now it is back to not getting off or taking forever. I can not keep going for hours. He always wants to resort to foreplay such as giving head or hand job. He will even take over when I no longer can. This makes me feel awful and honestly disgusts me. I feel that if we are making love then he should be fighting the urge to not go too soon????? Is this wrong? I have tried to discuss this with him asking if he is not turned on or what the problem is. He replies back that he does not know. He swears up and down that he does not know. He use to blame it on alcohol until he got off a couple times quickly while intoxicated. I don't want this to afffect our relationship I know we love each other and are happy. I just need some answers guys! Any info might help me understand. FYI I have never had this problem in any other relationship!
Alcohol can indeed affect a guy's ability to get off. Ask him to abstain from alcohol for a while and see what happens. It can be hard at times for a guy to control when he will come. Physical exhaustion, chronic stress, undiagnosed illnesses, and chronic depression are possible factors. Please try not to be too critical of him. Performance enhancing drugs such as Viagra may be able to shortcut a lot of his problems. I suggest the two of you to seek counseling with your family physician.
hmm, if he was able to "get off" quicker while drunk i think that would suggest that has problem is due to psychological inhibition as alcohol loosens this.