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Well I'm 21 years old. I've been sexually active since the age of 17, I've had 7 sexual partners, I have sex anywhere from everyday, to every few days, to once every couple of weeks, and I've never experienced orgasm. I've studied a LOT on the subject and I feel like I've tried everything but it doesn't work. I enjoy sex a lot, I love having oral, and I just love sex all together but I just can't climax. I honestly think I may have a problem with my clitoris. It is so small, it's hard to even locate. It doesn't protrude at all, even when aroused. And when it's stimulated, I don't get any pleasure. It just seems to be kind of insensitive. This is really upsetting because I feel like I will never enjoy sex as much as I should. My fiance is wonderful and is willing to do anything to help me but still, no matter what it doesn't work. I've tried every position in sex, lots of oral sex, fingering inside the vagina as well as the clitoris by me or another person, the use of toys, porn, etc.
So first of all, do you think that my clitoris itself could be the cause of this? And if so, is there ANYTHING I can do???? Are there any ways I can make it bigger or increase its sensitivity?
Secondly, are there any specific techniques you've discovered to overcome the problem of not being able to orgasm?
Please help me in any way that you can- I would appreciate it a lot. I feel like I have been so patient since I first started having sex but I'm beginning to lose hope and when I think about it, I feel like crying because I just want to orgasm and enjoy my sex life better with my fiance who I love with all my heart.

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I am also 21. It sounds like you and your fiance are really good with each other. In the way of him trying so hard for you and being understanding about it. I can't orgasm through any kind of sexual intercourse, and I have difficulties with clitoral stimulation where it can take as long as an hour to get anywhere. And it also sounds like you've tried everything in the book, but have you considered going to a doctor and asking if there is any kind of cosmetic surgery to enhance your clitoris? Have you tried the sex toy called a p***y pump, which can enlarge the clitoris? Also, don't try and harp on urself about it, this is not ur fault. Cause also psychologically dwelling on it, cause also make you lose any kind of feelings you might be able to have. Take care, and keep your options open there's always a way-Jill GOOD LUCK!
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I am 48 and have the same problem. I can count on two hands the amount of orgasms I's had during intercourse. Oral sex helps but it too takes a long time. Sometimes my toys and porn can give 5 O's and sometimes none. It's frustrating because I love making love but my guy can definitely tell whether or not I've had one. i've thought about the clit suckers too, but haven't gone that far yet. Just letting you know you are not alone.
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I have a similar problem. I have to rub my clit during intercourse in order to orgasm. It helps me to have my partner kiss my neck or play with my breasts to get there. He thinks he's not pleasing me because I have to do that, but we can't change the way our body was created...
Best of luck & congrats on the engagement!
Jas
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I have been married for 22.5 years, and I had my first orgasm a couple months ago, and have had 3 total. I also didn't cum until about a year ago. I too have an extremely small clitoris. Just last night I went to a Pleasure party and found out some crazy stuff is out there JUST FOR US and our inferior sized clitoris'. I got some stuff called Passion Potion, you squirt one pump onto your fingers, rub specifically on "THE" spot and just inside the vagina and wait, or make out for about 15 minutes. This stuff is supposed to plump up the areas it touches and bring the nerves to the surface. It is supposed to help you have an actual orgasm while having regular sex, not oral. You can do it orally too, but she said it doesn't taste that good. I will be finding out tomorrow and I can't wait. Hope this helps! Even tho this is 3 years after this posting.
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Hey, just wanted to know what ever happened with this Passion Potion? I have this exact same problem and am looking for ANY solution, and yours sounded promising! Can you let me know what happened? I'm sick and tired of feeling next to nothing all the time and hating oral... I hate not feeling normal!

Thanks for letting people like us know we're not alone.
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That's just how vaginas work. Nearly all women need clitoral stimulation to orgasm.
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ladymelanie you're right. Women usually need clit touching to reach orgasm. No shame in it, what we all need is cliteracy!
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There is more than one place on your body which can cause orgasm. I have knowledge about this topic. For some a very strong vibrator works well for the clit... you would have to get one that plugs into the wall as the battery operated do not have the power.

Additionally you can orgasm from G-spot stimulation. If you are unsure where this is all you have to do is lay down on your back, reach in and press upwards towards your belly button. You will feel a spot about the size of a dime that feels "spongy". This is the G-spot. Stroking this gently and then more aggressively can lead to an orgasm. This spot will grow in size, usually to the size of a quarter when fully stimulated.

Additionally there are either 3 or 4 more places where stimulation can assist in female orgasm. Please check out a book in one of the large chair bookstore for better directions.

Best of luck to you.
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I could not find the clitoris in my wife organ at all, but we have sex and she has orgasm normally. She does not have an extrude clitoris at all, I am wondering if yoou have same issue? Did you ever see your clitoris at all?
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relax, take your time, and One Day you will Orgasm. Do Not, However, try to Jack Yourself Off. it is Not The Same.
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You can't stimulate something that is so small you can't even find it
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You probably squirm all over the place thinking that is exciting. You are squirming because of the intense sensations from your clitoris being touched. STOP squirming. Lay there quietly and let the sensations build. Now it should not be a painful stimulation. You and your fiancé need to experiment with rubbing your clit hard to just barely touching it to provide the stimulus that feels best for you. This can change depending on how you feel. He has to be able to get in tune with what is turning you on and YOU have to communicate it to him by your reactions. That being said you must trust that your clitoris know what it wants. Let the sensations build and build. Do NOT try to stop it by squirming away. Your clit will grow and get hard like a little hard penis. Enjoy it. Feel it getting harder and more sensitive. DON'T Squirm away. Let it keep building. At some point your clitoris will take you to that involuntary orgasmic release. Remember you are trying to get to that point where your body will take over and give you the pleasure you and so many others desperately want to experience. Once you have experienced one orgasm you are well on your way to knowing what to expect and will be on a journey of orgasmic pleasure that words can't describe. All the best to you and a lifetime of orgasms.
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How did this work out for you?
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Have him lick it soft and rub it nice and soft this should make it feel really good
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