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hi i am at the end of my teather my daughter is nearly 5 years old and has been holding in her pooh from i started potty training her it is a constant battle with her and very stressfull she also started school this year and has missed quite alot already as she often needs to go and cant hold it and i am frightened to send her incase she goes in her pants and all the other kids know!! she is on medication to help her go but she still manages to hold it in! i have also noticed that when she really needs to go and has been holding it for so long she starts to come out in spots on her face i just feel so helpless and the dr's just keep sayin the same thing she will grow out of it but when!!

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I feel better now that I know there is other mommies who sit with the same problem. It's difficult, I know - sometimes when my 16 month old little girl has to push, I just get up and leave the room - I can't take it anymore!

She's been getting laxatives everyday for almost 3 months, she eats about 10 prunes EVERYDAY, she drinks alot of fluids, I even feed her olive oil!! I put vaseline up her butt and she eats that activia joghurt which is supposed to keep you regular EVERYDAY!! And she still manages to keep it in and then when it has to come out she screams as if someone is killing her, she makes her whole body stiff, I cant even bend her knees to open up her butt. It is horrible and I really don't know for how much longer I can handle it!!!!

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im 17 and have had the same problem on and off since i was like eight years old. I think its a psychological problem. I am so afrfaid of the pain im going to get from going poo. It hurts so bad, I bleed and it hurts for like the next two days straight, i cant even sleep at night and sometimes have to miss school. since i'd rather go through this pain as little as possible, I hold it in for like 2 weeks then go, and it huurts but id rather that than going everyday and haveing pain everyday. and the thing is, after i go, my butt feels like its been ripped, and Ill try to go the next day too, but it will just burn even more and its like im ripping the hole that was almost healed. You guys have no idea how painful this is! but i know for sure that if u guys give ur kids a pears a day, soon enough they will be regular. whenever i eat pears, i have normal poop, but then when i stop it goes back to the horrible pain, even if i stop for one day.

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It's so nice to have finally found a BUNCH of people thats child goes through this with their child as well. We've been looking for a response/responses like this for a long time. We have a 3 year old little girl and she's had these VERY SAME SYMPTOMS since she was just a little over a year old. I think it's ridiculous what the Dr. keeps telling us. IE. it's just something she'll grow out of, or just keep up with the fluids and Miralax. They tell us to give her about 1/2 to 3/4 of the adult dose(Depending on how severe the constipation is), and etc. We've tried EVERYTHING and no help yet. My Husband and I are almost at our wits end. To see her hurt so bad and there isn't much we can do. She's had Mirlax EVERYDAY since the Dr. told us to do it for almost 2 yrs. now and still no relief. It's insane that all of the Drs. at her dr. office say "It's normal", but have they ever went through the things us Mommy and Daddys' have seen our little ones go through? So until they see their little one go through this they'll never understand. All the Saying "I gotta Push", or "It hurts me", and the locking the legs together and there is hardly any way to get them apart to spread her cheeks to push it out.
Then when it finally does come out (days or even a couple weeks later) it is HARD AS A ROCK and it's HUGE! I don't even have stools as big as hers are in diameter. It's PITIFUL, and absoultely heartbreaking for us to see her go through this. I wish it was me and not her. We'll be out in public somewhere and the urge hits her, (Those of you that have seen your child go through this know exactly what I'm reffering to) people will come up to us and ask if she's having ceizures or if they need to call an ambulance for her. It's that bad and pitiful looking. We can't even go out to eat as a family due to her pain and screaming, saying she has to push (but is actually holding it in) & sweating. She can't even go out and play like a normal kid due to this ongoing pain and frustration. It's almost like she has contractions after a week or two with no poop or just streaking her diaper a little the pain and cramps start every 5-10 minutes so that is when we go help her by pulling her legs apart and holding her then the HARD POOP finally comes out and then about 3 days later we're back in this vicious cycle of pain.We've started to Help her by getting her legs pulled apart with her diaper on and then in turn getting a VERY HARD POOP. The poop is so hard in fact you can fold the diaper in half over it and can't mash it at all it's so hard. That is my story and there are more like it. I hate to see her or any other kid go through such a thing. If anyone has ideas DO TELL!!!! Thanks for your time reading this and God Bless! Happy Holidays! GOOD LUCK!

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We are obviously in a similar situation as many of you are, or I wouldn't be here. It is interesting to me to realize what a common challenge this is. It is miserable and frustrating, but apparently it's not completely rare.

There is definitely no magic cure for this problem, but many of you have given great ideas. I think the article found here - **** is very helpful in understanding what your child is going through.

The best realization I have had in regards to my daughter, is that we have have to continue, as best as possible, with a normal life. We do everything that we can for her, we are constantly trying new things, and then we wait with patience. I know she'll overcome this eventually and we don't need to add to her stress by adding our own frustration and drama.

In moments when I've washed the 7th pair of stained underwear and feel like I am going to lose it and I just want to yell "Just push it out!", I try to take a deep breath or take a break from the situation. I was so frustrated all the time in the beginning and I think it made things worse.

In the above mentioned article, it mentioned that patience is the key in overcoming this -- I completely agree. Good luck to all of you.

**edited by moderator** **web addresses are not allowed**

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my daughter has been constipated since we started her on food. she is now 2 1/2 and it has got progressivley worse!!! right now is as bad as it can get! We just had a baby so I think maybe anxiety has made it worse??? i have tried fiber, eating meat and veggies, dried prunes, prune juice, having no lactose, miralax, talking to her about her poo, nothing works! my husband is on a diet called " the specific carbohydrate diet" for crohns disease and it has helped him greatly!!!! if you google it you can find a lot of things about it and how it has helped babies and children with severe constipation. it is very drastic but we have been trying it now for a week and it has not helped yet but it says it can take a couple weeks to get your childs instesinal tract back to normal and then they can eventually eat regular agian. I have my doubts but if changing my little girls diet for a while can get rid of her constipation- then it is worth it. let me tell you i know what all of you are going through- my daughter is in pain constantley, she screams and she is soooo moody and angry sometimes and i blame her belly. recentley when she has pooed, they have been very long (5 inches) and at least 2 inches in diameter and it is heartbreaking for her and me.!!! I just wish so badly there was something else to do. if the diet works for us i will come back to tell you because there is nothing worse then seeing no poop in your babies diaper for years!!!

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My heart breaks for all the kids suffering with this and all the parents suffering along with them! My poor little 2.5 year old son is struggling with this, too. No idea why it starte, but on and off for the olast year and now for the last 3 weeks straight he is in so much pain. We have talks that most adults without kids might find silly - "you have to beat the poo, you have to push out the ppo" and cheering him on when he does.

My pedi told me that when there is just a little bit of diarrhea coming out, it is not poo but leakage around the poo - called encopresis. It happens once the child has held back poo and the colon has distended. If it goes on too long, it can make it hard for a kid to even tell when they have to go, much less have any faith in trying to push!

What I have learned from pedi and internet searches:
-Miralax is available over the counter and it is not the kind of laxative that dangerously stimulates the bowel, it just softens the poo.
-offer fruits that start with p - prunes, pears, peaches and fruit juices
-avoid bananas, bananas and dairy products
-LOTS of liquids!!!!!
-flax seed oil
-warm baths, putting vaseline around the outside as a lubricant
-make a regular time 2x/day after meals when we say 'now is when we go poos' and spend some time on the potty. This needs to be a regualr habit, but I am scared to have my son assocaite going potty with the pain of pooing so I will wait until the Miralax has kicked in...

What else?

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This all sounds very familiar. We have a 2 1/2 year old girl and she has struggled with her bowels since...well her whole life. To the point where she has had anal fissures, bleeding, and a hemmoroid. I have never even had a hemmoroid, my poor little girl. We have tried what seems like everything. Prune juice, flax, fiber, apples, pears, water, juice, enema's, everything. I have come to the conclusion that it just takes a balanced diet (which is very hard to do as a working mom using daycare 5 days a week for 10.5 hours a day). She goes when she is ready and struggles a bit, but as we are potty training it is getting a bit better. Seems easier for her to go on the potty than in a diaper (her movements are very large when she does finally go).
One hint I do have is we found out that our water and the water at daycare (both wells) were very high in iron which can cause constipation and hard stool. We have since stopped giving her water from our filtered system (still high in iron) and eliminated water from the tap at daycare. As much as I hate bottled water, this is what we are using. ;-)

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9 days seems very extreme--I saw an episode of Mystery Diagnosis where the baby had a rare problem that caused extreme time periods without a bm. I really don't remember what it was, but maybe you could look up the show or contact them through the Internet. That seems more than just a little constipation. The doctors kept telling them to try all the regular methods and they weren't working because she needed surgery and finally saw the right specialist who diagnosed the problem.

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i have a 1 1/2 boy with same since he was about 7 months. i use suppositories once in a while but he hates them and unless i hold his bumm together in my arms he pushes ir out right away. he i s now on lactulose syrup which binds the poop together with suagry liquid. if i stop for a coulple days he is back to constipation that takes him days to push out then it is a big painful experience for him where i help him. he drinks 3 cups milk/day- 4 oz. and eats lots of fruit but i was told maybe to switch milk due to possible allergy?(not by doctor). but could i not just water the milk down?

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My daughter who is now 19 months had a terrible problem with constipation. She would cry in pain. I feed her lots of vegetables so I couldn't understand why she was having so many problems. I started using flax seed oil and it has been working wonders. I HIGHLY recommend it to those of you who have not tried it. I saw results in less than 1 week. She has had regular bowel movements without any strain or pain. We have not needed to use a suppository in 1 week. This is all good news. I have been using 1tsp in her cereal or yoghurt per day. Since it is an oil it is hard to mix but she seems to not mind it. Good Luck to you all! I know how difficult it can be to have their little digestive tracts on tract. Not sure if this article is noted in these threads but it has some good information - http://www.askdrsears.com/html/8/T081100.asp

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My son will be 3 in April and we too are experiencing this terrible problem. My whole day revolves around when / if he is going to poop! He will literally hold his butt together so the poop will not come out. He crys that his botton hurts and it is breaking my heart. We just started using Miralax. He is not a juice drinker and I thought he ate a pretty good diet considering the occasional McDonalds happy meal. Can anyone else offer any other help. The doctor just says the same thing that everyone else has heard.

It's so sad and frustrating, why won't these little ones just poop? I read him the book Everyone Poops, and all he says is "I bet their poopy doesn't hurt", how sad is that?

Help!!

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For the younger ones - Baby Prunes!!! - and lots of it. My son is 14 months and has been doing this for the last 4 months. Not having a bowel movement for up to 10 days a time. We've been to the doctor's increased fluids, changed diets, suppositories, had to give him enemas when too much time elapsed. Now he he gets very little dairy (he is still breastfed) lots of vegetables and PRUNES. He won't eat from a spoon and he hates prunes so I have to sneak it. He has one bite of whole wheat bread which he loves and then on another piece of bread is a spoonful of prunes that I sneak into his mouth. Lactulose doesn't hurt either. I just give that to him when he is due for a bowel movement. Its over the counter.

My older son also does the same thing. He is three and isn't as bad as the younger one. He gets Lactulose as well around the time he is due for a bowel movement and that seems to help.

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I am on here trying to find a solution to my 2 year old daughters issues. To agree with the above, I feel that yes, a therapist is the only remaining answer. My husband, son and I are at our wits end with this precious little Olivia and now after stickers, charts, toys, candy, movie priveledges, I have nothing left. She is holding it in, passes a stool pretty much everyday but only if my husband forcefully holds her against her strain and only then will a poop fall out. It is beyond stressful, frustrating... it's driving me nuts!!!!! I am a stay at home mom and so I know what her diet consists of, who she's around, etc. Her pediatrician says that its normal and the behavior will pass? DOESN'T SEEM LIKE IT!!!!!!!!!!!!! It's been a week now... a long, draining week... I'm glad to know I'm not alone but GEEZ!!!????!!! I hope someone comes with a solution soon. We're using Little Ones stool softener once a day, she hates it of course, and lots of water, apple juice, strawberries, fiber... no luck. I don't think any pediatrician knows what the answer is (sounds like).

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Hi, I have the same with my 19 month old daughter, she holds it in for days and then when she want's to go and can not hold it in any longer it is too hard for her to get out. I was suggested fig syrup. This works but she still has this fear and tries to hold it in. I really don't know what to suggest I am just hoping she grows out of it.

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