No I don't go through his stuff! The reason why I listen is because he whispers! IF he didn't whisper I wouldn't listen! Due to the Cocaine and ALL the lying, I don't trust anything yet! So that's why I do that! Also we are usually VERY open with each other - which threw me for a loop when I found out he was addicted, because I didn't see that! And it hurt that he lied etc.!
My mom and I REALLY hated each other, She resented me for being dady's and granddads little girl! That was NOT my fault for crying out loud! BUT she was treated VERY badly by both of these men and resented that they were so nice to me and not to her! Which I GOT later on in life! Well sort of! I rarely saw my mother threw my teens and into my 20's, it was only her sickness and subsequent passing away that brought us together! I would give up ALL of that just to have her back though! :'( I am the same with my moms sister! We are like 2 peas in a pod! We are both hippies, IF I could wear Buffalo Sandals - Jesus Sandals - All year I would! And She DOES! We finish each others sentences - she lives in England Half the Year and India the other half - finding herself! 8-| ;-) XD
So your mom is doing this SINCE the talk?!!! That's not right at all! What about asking her "What is the problem here mom?" And also what sort of nasty things did she write? Who too and on what?! My mom REALLY wanted me dead when I was your age! She told me daily! She tried to kill me on several occaisions - no lie! And Truley had NO time for me at all! It was a Horrible time! My dad worked away and when he came home ALL hell would break out! When I was about your age, my mom said to my dad - infront of me 0 "IT's your choice, it's either her (me) or me (my mom)!!!!!!!!!" o.O :-( Can you imagine that? So shortly after my dad started treating me like she did, and we haven't been the same since! He now says my mom was bipolar psychotic, but that doesn't explain his role in placating her when she did and said TERRIBLE things to me! Beyond nightmare things! When menopause hit her, it HIT me the hardest! It was like living with a great white shark! And when her monthly was on OMG!!!!! It was hell! So maybe you mom is the same! Have you ever talked to your brother about how she treats you different!?
IF your mom is listening in, it's because she either wants to prove that you are doing something OR that she is desperate to find out about your life, because I bet you dollars to donuts her friends aren't like that with their kids! so she will tell them things about you, to make it sound like she knows what is going on in your life! When she doesn't have a CLUE! PErhaps just talk to your dad - if he's been better! Actually come out and lay it out on the line say something like, "Dad I can't take this hatred anymore, I think I want to go live with Aunty ......." See what he says! No use pounding your head against a wall! IF you truly believe you are doing nothing wrong, then this is HER problem and SHE has to own it OK? You can only change you, you can't change her!
My mom and I REALLY hated each other, She resented me for being dady's and granddads little girl! That was NOT my fault for crying out loud! BUT she was treated VERY badly by both of these men and resented that they were so nice to me and not to her! Which I GOT later on in life! Well sort of! I rarely saw my mother threw my teens and into my 20's, it was only her sickness and subsequent passing away that brought us together! I would give up ALL of that just to have her back though! :'( I am the same with my moms sister! We are like 2 peas in a pod! We are both hippies, IF I could wear Buffalo Sandals - Jesus Sandals - All year I would! And She DOES! We finish each others sentences - she lives in England Half the Year and India the other half - finding herself! 8-| ;-) XD
So your mom is doing this SINCE the talk?!!! That's not right at all! What about asking her "What is the problem here mom?" And also what sort of nasty things did she write? Who too and on what?! My mom REALLY wanted me dead when I was your age! She told me daily! She tried to kill me on several occaisions - no lie! And Truley had NO time for me at all! It was a Horrible time! My dad worked away and when he came home ALL hell would break out! When I was about your age, my mom said to my dad - infront of me 0 "IT's your choice, it's either her (me) or me (my mom)!!!!!!!!!" o.O :-( Can you imagine that? So shortly after my dad started treating me like she did, and we haven't been the same since! He now says my mom was bipolar psychotic, but that doesn't explain his role in placating her when she did and said TERRIBLE things to me! Beyond nightmare things! When menopause hit her, it HIT me the hardest! It was like living with a great white shark! And when her monthly was on OMG!!!!! It was hell! So maybe you mom is the same! Have you ever talked to your brother about how she treats you different!?
IF your mom is listening in, it's because she either wants to prove that you are doing something OR that she is desperate to find out about your life, because I bet you dollars to donuts her friends aren't like that with their kids! so she will tell them things about you, to make it sound like she knows what is going on in your life! When she doesn't have a CLUE! PErhaps just talk to your dad - if he's been better! Actually come out and lay it out on the line say something like, "Dad I can't take this hatred anymore, I think I want to go live with Aunty ......." See what he says! No use pounding your head against a wall! IF you truly believe you are doing nothing wrong, then this is HER problem and SHE has to own it OK? You can only change you, you can't change her!
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So I did something kind of stupid today!! I was going to do two things, but I only did one, but I think I made a breakthrough because of it! :-)
The whole day at school today I felt like c**p! I don't know what was going on but for some reason I decided not to go home after school and didn't tell anyone (which is not like me at all!! And i'm still not fully sure why I did it, but I guess I was desperate for something :-( ) So I walked with one of my friends to her house and just hung out and talked and stuff. Well when my parents got home and found out I wasn't there they tried to call me on my cell but I totally ignored them, I was fed up and didn't feel like talking to them. Well at around 10 my friend decided to blurt out that my parents didn't know where I was >:( so her mom made me go home. At this point I was scared to go home and didn't want to...so I walked down the path to the park and swung on the swings (like an id**t!) and jusy kept thinking about everything and the stuff that you've said and analyzed the situation and stuff...And then a bunch of creepy boys started to walk to the park, so I started to walk away and they kept saying stupid creepy stuff and one of them was kind of following me for a bit!! o.O so I walked faster and he stopped!! I was so scared though!!
Well I went home then, it was like 11, and I got in the door and my mom slapped me across the face and yelled at me to never do it again!! so then I like broke down and started crying *now this is the breakthrough moment, I NEVER saw comming!!* she grabbed me and hugged me!! o.O :-( :-D and said how I scared her (which I guess was what I was going for 8-| ) And then she cried and asked why I did that, so then I told her how she hated me and treated me like c**p and will never say "I Love You" after I say it...So then she said how she doesn't hate me, and I said then why do you ignore me, and roller your eyes at me, or get mad when I go to ask you stuff, and say horrible things to me or about me and call me fat (I weigh 120 and I'm 5'4 so I guess I could lose 5-10 pounds but still) and not try to have a relationship with me and do all the things I told you I hated after our talk and not give me what I need but instead stay mad at me and hate me because of the things I said, even though I said sorry! ...My dad kind of just sat there and didn't say anything...but then my mom ACTUALLY APPOLOGIZED to ME!! shes like never done that ever!! And then I told her who I am, because she has no clue!, and what I needed from her...and told her if I didn't get it that i'd be gone! :'( So she cried more and said she would try...so then I did what you did and looked into her eyes and said "I LOVE YOU and NEED YOU!" so she like took a deep breath and said "I Love You" back!! :'( :-D (crying happy tears)
So hopefully it gets better finally...bad news is i'm grounded :-( (I should have picked another day to make a statement, not when its the weekend! clearly wasn't thinking!)
It makes sense for you to listen when he wispers then, makes it seem like he's up to something...but at least you don't go through his stuff, but maybe that is why my mom does, to try and know whats going on in my life, I would tell her if she gave me the chance and listened to me and doesn't get mad or think i'm dumb or tell everyone.
Its funny, I don't wear Buffalo Sandals, but I LOVE flip flops lol ... I HATE socks, I never wear them, unless I have to wear shoes or boots.
Your mom really tried to kill you?!!! wow, sorry you had to go through that! I just felt it, she never said it or tried! Well my mom had a hysterectomy (sp?) which sucked, I started my period and she stoppped lol but ya hopefully her menopause is nicer to me (do you still get it if you don't get your period? %-) And my brother is too self-involved to know or care about whats going on, and hes never home anyway, so I don't think talking to him will do anything or get anywhere.
But thanks Bambi27 :-) For always understanding me and helping me :-) If I could give you a real hug I would!
I don't know how its going to be now, I still think it will be awkward for awhile, and I don't know how I can forget the things that have happened, so our relationship will always be strained in some way which sucks :'( and now my face hurts!
The whole day at school today I felt like c**p! I don't know what was going on but for some reason I decided not to go home after school and didn't tell anyone (which is not like me at all!! And i'm still not fully sure why I did it, but I guess I was desperate for something :-( ) So I walked with one of my friends to her house and just hung out and talked and stuff. Well when my parents got home and found out I wasn't there they tried to call me on my cell but I totally ignored them, I was fed up and didn't feel like talking to them. Well at around 10 my friend decided to blurt out that my parents didn't know where I was >:( so her mom made me go home. At this point I was scared to go home and didn't want to...so I walked down the path to the park and swung on the swings (like an id**t!) and jusy kept thinking about everything and the stuff that you've said and analyzed the situation and stuff...And then a bunch of creepy boys started to walk to the park, so I started to walk away and they kept saying stupid creepy stuff and one of them was kind of following me for a bit!! o.O so I walked faster and he stopped!! I was so scared though!!
Well I went home then, it was like 11, and I got in the door and my mom slapped me across the face and yelled at me to never do it again!! so then I like broke down and started crying *now this is the breakthrough moment, I NEVER saw comming!!* she grabbed me and hugged me!! o.O :-( :-D and said how I scared her (which I guess was what I was going for 8-| ) And then she cried and asked why I did that, so then I told her how she hated me and treated me like c**p and will never say "I Love You" after I say it...So then she said how she doesn't hate me, and I said then why do you ignore me, and roller your eyes at me, or get mad when I go to ask you stuff, and say horrible things to me or about me and call me fat (I weigh 120 and I'm 5'4 so I guess I could lose 5-10 pounds but still) and not try to have a relationship with me and do all the things I told you I hated after our talk and not give me what I need but instead stay mad at me and hate me because of the things I said, even though I said sorry! ...My dad kind of just sat there and didn't say anything...but then my mom ACTUALLY APPOLOGIZED to ME!! shes like never done that ever!! And then I told her who I am, because she has no clue!, and what I needed from her...and told her if I didn't get it that i'd be gone! :'( So she cried more and said she would try...so then I did what you did and looked into her eyes and said "I LOVE YOU and NEED YOU!" so she like took a deep breath and said "I Love You" back!! :'( :-D (crying happy tears)
So hopefully it gets better finally...bad news is i'm grounded :-( (I should have picked another day to make a statement, not when its the weekend! clearly wasn't thinking!)
It makes sense for you to listen when he wispers then, makes it seem like he's up to something...but at least you don't go through his stuff, but maybe that is why my mom does, to try and know whats going on in my life, I would tell her if she gave me the chance and listened to me and doesn't get mad or think i'm dumb or tell everyone.
Its funny, I don't wear Buffalo Sandals, but I LOVE flip flops lol ... I HATE socks, I never wear them, unless I have to wear shoes or boots.
Your mom really tried to kill you?!!! wow, sorry you had to go through that! I just felt it, she never said it or tried! Well my mom had a hysterectomy (sp?) which sucked, I started my period and she stoppped lol but ya hopefully her menopause is nicer to me (do you still get it if you don't get your period? %-) And my brother is too self-involved to know or care about whats going on, and hes never home anyway, so I don't think talking to him will do anything or get anywhere.
But thanks Bambi27 :-) For always understanding me and helping me :-) If I could give you a real hug I would!
I don't know how its going to be now, I still think it will be awkward for awhile, and I don't know how I can forget the things that have happened, so our relationship will always be strained in some way which sucks :'( and now my face hurts!
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Come close to the screen! CLOSER!....................................... Did you feel that? That was me slapping he other side of your face!!!! ;-) This is NOT what I was getting at, BUT sometimes it takes something drastic to create some drastic change! So good for you I think!! Yeah good timing with the weekend, but I think you can give up one weekend for a better relationship with your mom right?
See how it goes in the morning, Wouldn't you just LOVE to be a fly on the wall to hear what your mom and dad say to each other after ALL of this!? I think you got your point across kiddo, don't push it too far though OK? I will tell you a terrible true story that happend about 15 years ago!
There was/is this couple Paul Bernardo and Karlo Homolka! That are the most evil people in this world! They would rape young girls and even raped and drugged to death her own 14 year old sister! So one night there was this young girl called Leslie Mahaffy, she was pretty rebelious and her parents - especially her mom - were fed up and her mom said to her "IF you are late tonight I will lock the doors and you will have to find somewhere else to live!" So of course this rebellious young girl was late, so she was knocking on the door, the MOMENT these 2 monsters drove by! They offered her a ride, then kidnapped her, raped her and buried her in concrete and threw her in a lake, they found her body AFTER they were arrested for another murder of a young girl called Kristen French! Can you imagine what that mother felt like? I understand it, but that POOR Woman and of course that poor kid! So the parents are now divorced and she had a nervous breakdown! So the moral is do NOT push your parent like that again OK? Because those creepy guys might have been EVIL guys!
The only words I ever said to my mom was "I hate you and wish you weren't my mother!" This was after hours and hours of verbal/phsical and emotional abuse! So don't stop that communication OK? Just act or just be normal and try and be happy, showing her that THIS makes you happy - knowing how she feels!
You didn't tell me who she was writing terrible things too? And also you do NOT need to loose weight honey! My left little toe weighs 5 pounds!!!!! ;-) XD XD
See how it goes in the morning, Wouldn't you just LOVE to be a fly on the wall to hear what your mom and dad say to each other after ALL of this!? I think you got your point across kiddo, don't push it too far though OK? I will tell you a terrible true story that happend about 15 years ago!
There was/is this couple Paul Bernardo and Karlo Homolka! That are the most evil people in this world! They would rape young girls and even raped and drugged to death her own 14 year old sister! So one night there was this young girl called Leslie Mahaffy, she was pretty rebelious and her parents - especially her mom - were fed up and her mom said to her "IF you are late tonight I will lock the doors and you will have to find somewhere else to live!" So of course this rebellious young girl was late, so she was knocking on the door, the MOMENT these 2 monsters drove by! They offered her a ride, then kidnapped her, raped her and buried her in concrete and threw her in a lake, they found her body AFTER they were arrested for another murder of a young girl called Kristen French! Can you imagine what that mother felt like? I understand it, but that POOR Woman and of course that poor kid! So the parents are now divorced and she had a nervous breakdown! So the moral is do NOT push your parent like that again OK? Because those creepy guys might have been EVIL guys!
The only words I ever said to my mom was "I hate you and wish you weren't my mother!" This was after hours and hours of verbal/phsical and emotional abuse! So don't stop that communication OK? Just act or just be normal and try and be happy, showing her that THIS makes you happy - knowing how she feels!
You didn't tell me who she was writing terrible things too? And also you do NOT need to loose weight honey! My left little toe weighs 5 pounds!!!!! ;-) XD XD
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Hey!! XD she left a mark :-( now I have her hand print with me! Thanks, i'm proud of myself...just joking!! Totally out of my character to do that! But it worked so far...ya one weekend isn't so bad, I have homework anway 8-|
Well the morning she said good morning to me :-) and I heard it out a little more about last night, but whatever...expected... from both of them and went over the whole "what if something happend to you!" stuff...Ya a fly on the wall would have been awesome! I tried to listen for a bit, but I was so exhausted I just went to bed with my doggy baby...I love him! (hes getting old though, which terrifies me, I know he's only a dog but i'm scared to lose him :-( he's like my little bro, yes i'm weird!)
I don't plan on doing it again, still think I was stupid for doing it. Ya i've heard of them, I live in Ontario, and we talked about them in my law class. Did you know the girls or their families? Ya, they were creepy!! four creepy guys!! but I was like 5-10minutes away from home anyway.
I've told my mom i've hated her before...but not in awhile...ummm...she wrote a lot of things to my aunts and family members and stuff (when she would send pictures she would chose the WORST looking ones of me to send!) I know she talks to them about me all the time too, and to her friends and co-workers! (I was talking to my one aunt about it before, the one thats like me, but its hard when its my mom sister to do that) shes called me ugly and fat infront of my friends (when she is! and it sucks, because my brother is a stick! he can eat whatever and whenever and he won't gain anything! totally not fair, if i were to even eat one thing you know where it would go! :-( ), and says how she wishes I was one of them (or more like that one of them was her daughter instead of me) and stupid c**p! but half the time she will say something, and then later twist it around as if i said it and make it seem like i was mean for saying it, like she did the other day and i called her on it and shes like "i was only joking" well then are you doing to tell everyone else you were joking because i'm pretty sure they don't know that and now think i'm mean!!
shes messed up! but anyway, today was good so far so lets hope it stays that way :-)
Well the morning she said good morning to me :-) and I heard it out a little more about last night, but whatever...expected... from both of them and went over the whole "what if something happend to you!" stuff...Ya a fly on the wall would have been awesome! I tried to listen for a bit, but I was so exhausted I just went to bed with my doggy baby...I love him! (hes getting old though, which terrifies me, I know he's only a dog but i'm scared to lose him :-( he's like my little bro, yes i'm weird!)
I don't plan on doing it again, still think I was stupid for doing it. Ya i've heard of them, I live in Ontario, and we talked about them in my law class. Did you know the girls or their families? Ya, they were creepy!! four creepy guys!! but I was like 5-10minutes away from home anyway.
I've told my mom i've hated her before...but not in awhile...ummm...she wrote a lot of things to my aunts and family members and stuff (when she would send pictures she would chose the WORST looking ones of me to send!) I know she talks to them about me all the time too, and to her friends and co-workers! (I was talking to my one aunt about it before, the one thats like me, but its hard when its my mom sister to do that) shes called me ugly and fat infront of my friends (when she is! and it sucks, because my brother is a stick! he can eat whatever and whenever and he won't gain anything! totally not fair, if i were to even eat one thing you know where it would go! :-( ), and says how she wishes I was one of them (or more like that one of them was her daughter instead of me) and stupid c**p! but half the time she will say something, and then later twist it around as if i said it and make it seem like i was mean for saying it, like she did the other day and i called her on it and shes like "i was only joking" well then are you doing to tell everyone else you were joking because i'm pretty sure they don't know that and now think i'm mean!!
shes messed up! but anyway, today was good so far so lets hope it stays that way :-)
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I live in Calgary! so I just know what you know about those you know what! Your mom sounds VERY insecure about something - as my mom was! I went up and down with my weight and even when I was slim my mom still called me fat - even though she was HUGE! It was unreal really, I think they lived through us or something! When I got married it was my MOMS wedding and we fought like cat and dog before - it was AWFUL! Thank God for my aunt coming over and letting her and my grandma have it for telling me I was fat when they both were! Kind of like a status thing in front of others etc. I don't get adults I REALLY don't 8-| ;-) XD XD I have studied people ALL my life and try to figure out the mind of people and why they do what they do, I find humans FASCINATING! That's why I say "Parents have a lot to answer for"
When I finally told my mom ALL the terrible stuff she did, she actually told me she "Didn't remember" Some of that I think is C**p but on the other hand because she was pschotic perhaps her brain wouldn't allow her to remember hurting her own child so much! As it is TOTALLY against nature isn't it? Mother animals will kill and be killed saving their children, humans and chimps are the ONLY animals who kill their children! So it's interesting! That's what helped me, trying to figure out WHY my mom did what she did to ME and not my sister! I am a VERY strange person, I LOVE Celtic stuff, Myths, Hippey stuff, Astrology etc, my mom didn't "GET" me, and I think because I was SO much like my aunt, she hated me for it! So my Wedding dress - which was made by my moms friend - was like a Celtiv Princess look - you know with the long sleeves (sleeping beauty kind of thing) well my mom went BALLISTIC! Only my girlfriends, my moms friend and my aunt saw it, because we all decided my mom would freak out! She told me I looked a mess! I was DEVESTATED! And she and her friend didn't talk for YEARS! On the day I wasn't told by either my mom or dad that I looked nice! And when I got down the aisle and my husband and his buddies said "Dawn you look beautiful!" I started SOBBING Because I would never hear those words out of my families mouth! It was devestating to me! Then several years later, my sister got married and when we were getting ready to go to the church my sister came out and my mom said "Doesn't she look beautiful?!" "You look SO beautiful and the most beautiful girl in the world" She turned to me and said "Doesn't she look beautiful Dawn?" I thought I had been stabbed in the heart! When we were driving to the church, I had my husband pull over so I could CRY my eyes out! And redo my makeup! I just had my 1st son 6 weeks before and I got drunk off of 1 bottle of wine! 8-| o.O I can NEVER understand that difference in how children are treated! And they need to be told and HAVE to explain WHY? It's soul destroying! So don't let up on your mom, if you guys talk today, ask her why she says those things to others - ask her infront of your dad too - because a lot of times, parents don't know what the other does!
I just thought to myself "Who is the counsellor here, me or Claire!!!!"? ;-) o.O XD XD XD
When I finally told my mom ALL the terrible stuff she did, she actually told me she "Didn't remember" Some of that I think is C**p but on the other hand because she was pschotic perhaps her brain wouldn't allow her to remember hurting her own child so much! As it is TOTALLY against nature isn't it? Mother animals will kill and be killed saving their children, humans and chimps are the ONLY animals who kill their children! So it's interesting! That's what helped me, trying to figure out WHY my mom did what she did to ME and not my sister! I am a VERY strange person, I LOVE Celtic stuff, Myths, Hippey stuff, Astrology etc, my mom didn't "GET" me, and I think because I was SO much like my aunt, she hated me for it! So my Wedding dress - which was made by my moms friend - was like a Celtiv Princess look - you know with the long sleeves (sleeping beauty kind of thing) well my mom went BALLISTIC! Only my girlfriends, my moms friend and my aunt saw it, because we all decided my mom would freak out! She told me I looked a mess! I was DEVESTATED! And she and her friend didn't talk for YEARS! On the day I wasn't told by either my mom or dad that I looked nice! And when I got down the aisle and my husband and his buddies said "Dawn you look beautiful!" I started SOBBING Because I would never hear those words out of my families mouth! It was devestating to me! Then several years later, my sister got married and when we were getting ready to go to the church my sister came out and my mom said "Doesn't she look beautiful?!" "You look SO beautiful and the most beautiful girl in the world" She turned to me and said "Doesn't she look beautiful Dawn?" I thought I had been stabbed in the heart! When we were driving to the church, I had my husband pull over so I could CRY my eyes out! And redo my makeup! I just had my 1st son 6 weeks before and I got drunk off of 1 bottle of wine! 8-| o.O I can NEVER understand that difference in how children are treated! And they need to be told and HAVE to explain WHY? It's soul destroying! So don't let up on your mom, if you guys talk today, ask her why she says those things to others - ask her infront of your dad too - because a lot of times, parents don't know what the other does!
I just thought to myself "Who is the counsellor here, me or Claire!!!!"? ;-) o.O XD XD XD
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I have some family that live in Calgary! Did you get the snow? Ya I think they do try to live through us, she tries to control what I do or say or wear, but she can't, we are opposites! What I like she doesn't, and what she likes I don't...lol...we have simularities, but not in style and life.
Your an adult, do you get yourself? XD How did you study people? %-) ... Ya I don't get why or how people can hurt their own, but hamsters sometimes eat their babies o.O But I think its even harder for you because you had a sister, if me and my brother were the same sex it would be different...did you ever talk to people about your life to help you, kind of like I am?
At least you found your perfect match then! someone how accepts you for who you are :-D I don't think people realize how hurtful words are, or lack or words! same with actions :-(
LOL!! I want to be a child and youth worker! My aunt does foster care, and I love it and what she does, shes awesome!
Sorry if my stuff is bringing back memories and hurt of your stuff :-( were like the same, but different, similar feelings and situations, only you had it far worse! which sucks and i'm sorry for that :-(
Your an adult, do you get yourself? XD How did you study people? %-) ... Ya I don't get why or how people can hurt their own, but hamsters sometimes eat their babies o.O But I think its even harder for you because you had a sister, if me and my brother were the same sex it would be different...did you ever talk to people about your life to help you, kind of like I am?
At least you found your perfect match then! someone how accepts you for who you are :-D I don't think people realize how hurtful words are, or lack or words! same with actions :-(
LOL!! I want to be a child and youth worker! My aunt does foster care, and I love it and what she does, shes awesome!
Sorry if my stuff is bringing back memories and hurt of your stuff :-( were like the same, but different, similar feelings and situations, only you had it far worse! which sucks and i'm sorry for that :-(
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Yeah I GET me ;-) XD and whats with the snow?!!! this is nuts! I watch and listen to people! I have been known to stand and stir my white mocha for about 10 minutes listening to peoples conversations XD I talked to my freinds who are still my freinds today! I have 5 girlfriends who I've been freinds with for 32 years!!!! We all just want to be loved, heard, and respected and to know we matter! The worst form of abuse - as far as I'm concerned anyway - is Emotional/Mental Abuse! Those words OR lack of, stay with your forever! I have a hard time NOT saying terrible things to my boys but I DONT! Thus me not getting my mom for just shutting up instead! My memories are part of what makes me who I am today! I remember those things all the time, it keeps me in the moment with my boys so I KNOW NOT to go further! I think most teenagers and adults ARE the same! As adults can remember what it was like as a teenager! And the strange thing is, nothing changes! Just look at Romeo And Juliet, NOW if only their parents had listened to them and let them go out together.... ;-) XD how was it today!?
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Well its good that you get yourself XD sometimes I get myself, and sometimes I don't %-) Like I said before, I know why I am the way I am, I get that and understand it, but it sucks, and sometimes I wish I was different (maybe then my mom would like me better :-( ) So you really listen in on people, what do you get from that? like what do you do with it? I hope I can have friends like that!! Like ALL of my best friends throught the years, the ones I love and have the closests relationships with and who are JUST like me and we get along amazingly and understand and GET one another, end up moving away! and I HATE that! :'( Like my best friend right now, her family moves all the time, not just like a little move, but move back and fourth to the States and Canada, and I love her! but her family is talking about moving :'( I think thats a part of my problem, like why i don't trust people, or am quiet and have a REALLY HARD TIME opening up to people, because their either going to hurt me or their going to leave :'( it sucks!! how do i change that?
And the snow, I have no idea whats up with that! it's SO HOT here though!! its like killer, in the 30's and the humidex is like 36! Ontario is normally coldish 20's and last year it rained like everyday it seemed.
Ya your memories and life do make you who you are today, and you seem like a really nice person :-) so I guess if you had to go through all that you get you where you are today then it may have been worth it, not totally but you get what I mean.
Today was okay, my mom was out most of the day doing things for her baby! but whatever...my grandparents came over today, so since she was out, I thought I should clean the house before they came over (like wash the towels, put away the dishes, sweep,mop and vacuumed the house and dust and stuff) so when she came home the house was spotless! and she just looked around and looked at me but never said thank you! i even baked some cupcakes! so i looked at her and said "your welcome!" and went upstairs, i don't know why its so hard to say thanks for doing all the stuff she should have done knowing we had company coming over but instead decided to go out for no reason! I say thanks for her when she makes dinner or buys me something... >:( so thats how my day went, but shes not ignoring me which is good.
Also, I have a question thats completely off topic, but i've read some stuff on this site and noticed you've answered some posts so maybe you can answer mine, if not thats fine but ya.
So my period is crazy! and its been crazy ever since i've gotten it. Well its still really irregular, and i know it takes like two years to sort itself out but its still not regular, like i just started to keep track of it (just figured out how) and before it was like 37 days apart, and then the next month it was 35 days apart and then this time it was 50 days apart...that can't be normal! ...and then when i get it, its like HELL! the pain is so intense i can barely walk, i throw up, and cry, i feel so weak...like literally, i want to rip my uterus out to stop the pain! so clearly i have to stay home from school...do you know what causes that? I've asked my mom to take me to the doctors twice now, she says okay but never does it!
And the snow, I have no idea whats up with that! it's SO HOT here though!! its like killer, in the 30's and the humidex is like 36! Ontario is normally coldish 20's and last year it rained like everyday it seemed.
Ya your memories and life do make you who you are today, and you seem like a really nice person :-) so I guess if you had to go through all that you get you where you are today then it may have been worth it, not totally but you get what I mean.
Today was okay, my mom was out most of the day doing things for her baby! but whatever...my grandparents came over today, so since she was out, I thought I should clean the house before they came over (like wash the towels, put away the dishes, sweep,mop and vacuumed the house and dust and stuff) so when she came home the house was spotless! and she just looked around and looked at me but never said thank you! i even baked some cupcakes! so i looked at her and said "your welcome!" and went upstairs, i don't know why its so hard to say thanks for doing all the stuff she should have done knowing we had company coming over but instead decided to go out for no reason! I say thanks for her when she makes dinner or buys me something... >:( so thats how my day went, but shes not ignoring me which is good.
Also, I have a question thats completely off topic, but i've read some stuff on this site and noticed you've answered some posts so maybe you can answer mine, if not thats fine but ya.
So my period is crazy! and its been crazy ever since i've gotten it. Well its still really irregular, and i know it takes like two years to sort itself out but its still not regular, like i just started to keep track of it (just figured out how) and before it was like 37 days apart, and then the next month it was 35 days apart and then this time it was 50 days apart...that can't be normal! ...and then when i get it, its like HELL! the pain is so intense i can barely walk, i throw up, and cry, i feel so weak...like literally, i want to rip my uterus out to stop the pain! so clearly i have to stay home from school...do you know what causes that? I've asked my mom to take me to the doctors twice now, she says okay but never does it!
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so basically YOU are listening in to my conversations!!!!? 8-| ;-) XD see it's hard not too! Its that studying people thing - fascinates me! Bbefore I get to your other problem! Who's parents came over today? your mom or dads?
periods take till you're about 19/20 to stop being so wonky! what you suffer from is called dysmenoreha - painful periods! some are from wonky hormones - usually estrogen is the culprit. and I think in your case it is probably a thicker buid up of the lining! so instead of sheddind ever 28-30 days ur having another week and more of uterine lining coming away! I suffered for YEARS from this and eventually had a hysterectomy at 36 - mine was from the veins around my uterus being so engourged with blood that it would constrict my uterus - so kind of like labour pains all the time! A great thing is Cramp Bark - you can get it from your local health food store, also Evening of Primrose Oil! RU on the Pill? If not this can help too - I went on it when I was 15 because I had to be hospitalized every month for such bad pain, I was on morphine - it was HELL! Hot compress's work, as does a good hot bath!
The reason why you don't open up is because you have learnt NOT too! How can you open up if you feel like you are going to be rebuffed? See I've always been an open book, I said WHATEVER I was thinking and feeling and that would make my family uncomfortable! But my friends found that endearing! And as I got older and COOLER! ;-) XD I was still an open book, but IF someone didn't like what they were reading they could keep on moving along! I'm an oxymoron actualy - BE CAREFUL! ;-) - I'm as sensitive as they come! BUT if you talk down to me or be nasty to me or my loved ones! STEP BACK! Because I will RIP you apart! If a worker is rude in the store! This is me :-S and seconds later this is them o.O :'( ! I don't know why?! ;-) 8-| How do you change YOU!? You don't you just learn to deal with it and not be so hard on yourself! You are an articulate, intelligent, lovely young lady - with a VERY ugly brother! ;-) - who happens to get upset about people hurting them or moving away! The question to ask yourself is this "Why woudn't I get upset about those 2 things?!" Right?! It's ALL in the way you look at it honey! You can look at your mom as a cold heart B or you can look at her as a hurt little girl in a adult body - who is NOT doing well playing grown up! MAN! I just realized how good I am!!!! DAM! ;-) XD XD XD 8)
periods take till you're about 19/20 to stop being so wonky! what you suffer from is called dysmenoreha - painful periods! some are from wonky hormones - usually estrogen is the culprit. and I think in your case it is probably a thicker buid up of the lining! so instead of sheddind ever 28-30 days ur having another week and more of uterine lining coming away! I suffered for YEARS from this and eventually had a hysterectomy at 36 - mine was from the veins around my uterus being so engourged with blood that it would constrict my uterus - so kind of like labour pains all the time! A great thing is Cramp Bark - you can get it from your local health food store, also Evening of Primrose Oil! RU on the Pill? If not this can help too - I went on it when I was 15 because I had to be hospitalized every month for such bad pain, I was on morphine - it was HELL! Hot compress's work, as does a good hot bath!
The reason why you don't open up is because you have learnt NOT too! How can you open up if you feel like you are going to be rebuffed? See I've always been an open book, I said WHATEVER I was thinking and feeling and that would make my family uncomfortable! But my friends found that endearing! And as I got older and COOLER! ;-) XD I was still an open book, but IF someone didn't like what they were reading they could keep on moving along! I'm an oxymoron actualy - BE CAREFUL! ;-) - I'm as sensitive as they come! BUT if you talk down to me or be nasty to me or my loved ones! STEP BACK! Because I will RIP you apart! If a worker is rude in the store! This is me :-S and seconds later this is them o.O :'( ! I don't know why?! ;-) 8-| How do you change YOU!? You don't you just learn to deal with it and not be so hard on yourself! You are an articulate, intelligent, lovely young lady - with a VERY ugly brother! ;-) - who happens to get upset about people hurting them or moving away! The question to ask yourself is this "Why woudn't I get upset about those 2 things?!" Right?! It's ALL in the way you look at it honey! You can look at your mom as a cold heart B or you can look at her as a hurt little girl in a adult body - who is NOT doing well playing grown up! MAN! I just realized how good I am!!!! DAM! ;-) XD XD XD 8)
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Well, I was trying to figure out what was wrong with me, and its not my fault you so happen to answer some people XD But that would make sense, the dysmenoreha thing...but its kind of hard to take and do some of those things when your throwing up, i've tried to take midol and pamprin before but it just comes back up! and i've tired the hot bath before but it didn't really do much. I'm not on the pill, but it would be a great excuse to go on it!
Do I fascinate you? XD It was my mom's parents, my dad's parents never come over! His dad is weird, but he's also pretty sick :-( so its hard for him to come over, but he likes staying at home, and his mom doesn't drive so ya...we go over there a lot but ya. And their both like neat freaks, like me, have you ever watch Everyone Loves Ryamond? well their kind of like Marie! And my dad's mom especially! So not like our house is dirty and stuff, but if i know their coming over i make sure it is nice, but you do it when you have company coming over anyway, no matter who they are.
I wish and want to be really outgoing and open...lol...ya my dad always says "watch out!" if someone tries to argue something with me, lol, because i will fight tooth and nail and they know it! ... its hard to just deal with it, when you have people telling you to change, and i can't! but your right, i shoud be upset about them, and it makes sense, but then everytime i get hurt, i stop myself from moving on and let it get to me...NICE analogy of my mom!
XD you are good!
Do I fascinate you? XD It was my mom's parents, my dad's parents never come over! His dad is weird, but he's also pretty sick :-( so its hard for him to come over, but he likes staying at home, and his mom doesn't drive so ya...we go over there a lot but ya. And their both like neat freaks, like me, have you ever watch Everyone Loves Ryamond? well their kind of like Marie! And my dad's mom especially! So not like our house is dirty and stuff, but if i know their coming over i make sure it is nice, but you do it when you have company coming over anyway, no matter who they are.
I wish and want to be really outgoing and open...lol...ya my dad always says "watch out!" if someone tries to argue something with me, lol, because i will fight tooth and nail and they know it! ... its hard to just deal with it, when you have people telling you to change, and i can't! but your right, i shoud be upset about them, and it makes sense, but then everytime i get hurt, i stop myself from moving on and let it get to me...NICE analogy of my mom!
XD you are good!
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Ok! It's a good thing that I DO study people as I'm going to give you some lessons and some training to take over for me one day! Ok my little grasshopper (OLD 70's TV show analogy)?
YOU cleaned the house and made cupcakes while your MOM was out ALL day and didn't thank YOU for doing this for HER parents!!! Now THINK about it for a minute grasshopper! What does this SAY? What does it SHOW? Think lttle one think!!!!
We ARE Everyone Loves Raymond! Actually my husband and I have made decissions watching the show! Our youngest son is disabled and was VERY ill when he was litle, so we had to make the decisision to keep him back in Playschool - the EXACT same night Deborah and Raymond had too on ELR! Ray IS my husband!! I'm a bit like Deborah! And my dad is Frank! My mother in law is Marie - but without the heart! ;-)
OK Back to my lesson - what conclusion to my question have you come too?
Regarding your pain, I would suggest you going on a Progesterone only Pill! And Do NOT use this as an excuse OK? honest honey! I went on it for pain, and it remained like that till much later on! I had TOO many friends who were pregnant at 15, 16, 17 etc. And I was NOT going to do that! Actually IF I had my way I would have remained a virgin till marriage! Because I saw the c**p that came with it! IF you are still a virgin, don't be in a big hurry OK? I think ALL young girls should wait till they are a LOT older to handle it! It's too much pressure on them! This is just my personal opinion, not religious or anything like that! Just seen and heard too much - I'm sure you understand!
I used to take about 16 Midol a day - NADA! So you need to get a hormone check and since you are 16 you can make that appointment in Canada - also talk to your mom - woman to woman - about the pain you are in! I had to bring the pill up to my mom, because a Good friend of mine was put on it when she was 14 - due to the fact she would also vomit and pass out from the pain ( as did I) so I understand that honey! 1 thing that REALLY worked for me is using a rolling pin on my stomach, laying down and just rolling it over your uterus! It helps the tense pelvic muscles and the uterine muscles relax!
You know what kiddo? You ARE what you are! I DO get you, because you remind me SO much of myself! I have this statement "I NEED my day in court!" Which basically means "I NEED to make you pay or say sorry for doing this to me!" I will hold a grudge till the end of time, IF you hurt me or mine - RUN! You know the singer PINK? Well she was really bullied when she was younger! And when she started getting a little successful a girl that was awful to her, came up to her acting ALL chummy! PINK turned to her and whispered in her ear and said "One day when you are walking down the street, you will feel a tap on your shoulder, IF I were you DO NOT turn Around, because it will be ME!" She said she will NEVER forgive her and others! And I too am like that! It is ALL from our upbringing!
I KNOW!!!! ;-) 8) XD
SO what have you learned today from the master?
YOU cleaned the house and made cupcakes while your MOM was out ALL day and didn't thank YOU for doing this for HER parents!!! Now THINK about it for a minute grasshopper! What does this SAY? What does it SHOW? Think lttle one think!!!!
We ARE Everyone Loves Raymond! Actually my husband and I have made decissions watching the show! Our youngest son is disabled and was VERY ill when he was litle, so we had to make the decisision to keep him back in Playschool - the EXACT same night Deborah and Raymond had too on ELR! Ray IS my husband!! I'm a bit like Deborah! And my dad is Frank! My mother in law is Marie - but without the heart! ;-)
OK Back to my lesson - what conclusion to my question have you come too?
Regarding your pain, I would suggest you going on a Progesterone only Pill! And Do NOT use this as an excuse OK? honest honey! I went on it for pain, and it remained like that till much later on! I had TOO many friends who were pregnant at 15, 16, 17 etc. And I was NOT going to do that! Actually IF I had my way I would have remained a virgin till marriage! Because I saw the c**p that came with it! IF you are still a virgin, don't be in a big hurry OK? I think ALL young girls should wait till they are a LOT older to handle it! It's too much pressure on them! This is just my personal opinion, not religious or anything like that! Just seen and heard too much - I'm sure you understand!
I used to take about 16 Midol a day - NADA! So you need to get a hormone check and since you are 16 you can make that appointment in Canada - also talk to your mom - woman to woman - about the pain you are in! I had to bring the pill up to my mom, because a Good friend of mine was put on it when she was 14 - due to the fact she would also vomit and pass out from the pain ( as did I) so I understand that honey! 1 thing that REALLY worked for me is using a rolling pin on my stomach, laying down and just rolling it over your uterus! It helps the tense pelvic muscles and the uterine muscles relax!
You know what kiddo? You ARE what you are! I DO get you, because you remind me SO much of myself! I have this statement "I NEED my day in court!" Which basically means "I NEED to make you pay or say sorry for doing this to me!" I will hold a grudge till the end of time, IF you hurt me or mine - RUN! You know the singer PINK? Well she was really bullied when she was younger! And when she started getting a little successful a girl that was awful to her, came up to her acting ALL chummy! PINK turned to her and whispered in her ear and said "One day when you are walking down the street, you will feel a tap on your shoulder, IF I were you DO NOT turn Around, because it will be ME!" She said she will NEVER forgive her and others! And I too am like that! It is ALL from our upbringing!
I KNOW!!!! ;-) 8) XD
SO what have you learned today from the master?
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LOL...I think I am going to fail your lesson :-( but here goes nothing...
Are you trying to say that because I was never asked to do what I did, that I shouldn't have expected anything from it? or that I made her feel bad and insecure about herself by doing all that for her? ...i'm sorry failed but i'm really confused right now %-) not sure what your trying to say...but its not like I wanted a thank you for doing everything for her parents, I just wanted a general thanks for cleaning for the sake of cleaning....I don't know what your getting at :'(
Well the only thing is, even if I make the appointment for my doctors, I will still need someone to take me there...But my mom knows how much pain i'm in, shes had to come pick me up from school so many times, till I realized to just stay home when I got it, and shes seen me in pain and throwing up and stuff, so she knows, thats why i've asked her before to take me to the doctors...I won't mention the pill, and just see what my doctor says, and if he puts me on it...well if I do go on it, it would be because of pain, but also against pregnancy (but my mom doesn't need to know that) I don't know anyone whos pregnant...what do you mean "if you had it your way?" ...but i'm not a virgin, and i wasn't in a hurry, but the guy I was with was, not like he forced me, but I didn't really want it...I dunno, its stupid :-(
I love pink! I could relate to some of her songs...and kelly clarkson :$
So I learned to be me and be happy with that :-D Go to the doctors and get checked out, and the mom thing really threw me off 8-|
Are you trying to say that because I was never asked to do what I did, that I shouldn't have expected anything from it? or that I made her feel bad and insecure about herself by doing all that for her? ...i'm sorry failed but i'm really confused right now %-) not sure what your trying to say...but its not like I wanted a thank you for doing everything for her parents, I just wanted a general thanks for cleaning for the sake of cleaning....I don't know what your getting at :'(
Well the only thing is, even if I make the appointment for my doctors, I will still need someone to take me there...But my mom knows how much pain i'm in, shes had to come pick me up from school so many times, till I realized to just stay home when I got it, and shes seen me in pain and throwing up and stuff, so she knows, thats why i've asked her before to take me to the doctors...I won't mention the pill, and just see what my doctor says, and if he puts me on it...well if I do go on it, it would be because of pain, but also against pregnancy (but my mom doesn't need to know that) I don't know anyone whos pregnant...what do you mean "if you had it your way?" ...but i'm not a virgin, and i wasn't in a hurry, but the guy I was with was, not like he forced me, but I didn't really want it...I dunno, its stupid :-(
I love pink! I could relate to some of her songs...and kelly clarkson :$
So I learned to be me and be happy with that :-D Go to the doctors and get checked out, and the mom thing really threw me off 8-|
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It's OK Grasshopper, I am a patient teacher!!! ;-) XD XD
You know how I mentioned about your mom and her moms relationship? WELL what happened the other day says a LOT! NOT about what you did, BUT what SHE didn't! She was late, couldn't care less, and didn't thank you for picking up her slack for HER parents! This is a BIG signal of how she feels about her mom! I think your mom is VERY closed off to her truth! She might have lead you to believe everything was fine with her mom, BUT I really don't think that is true! Also I have another theory about what she did and thus did to you, is that you doing ALL of this, shows that you have more in you than she did and also it would give her another chance to make herself look better - IF you hadn't done anything! Does this make sense? Kind of like "SEE mom what I have to do because Claire didn't do a darn thing all day, I told you she was lazy etc. etc. etc." And what you have to remember is this Claire, THIS is NOT about YOU! It's about your mom and more than likely her mom!
When I was young - before 14 - I was flat chested, over weight, MAJOR zits, glasses etc! I was bullied (tortured) at school, and treated just the same at home! The boys and girls called me fat and a looser and school, THEN I came hom crying to tell my mom, and then she would turn around and say the same thing - even after she knew I was devestated! So it was a double whammy! My Grandma was a big woman as was my mom, and they would BOTH stand there and my GM would say to my mom she was fat, my mom would transfer that pain and insult right away too me! It was the WEIRDEST thing EVER! EVERY time I would phone my grandma it went like this "Hello Darling! How is your diet going?" And when we picked her up at the airport her first words were "Hello Darling, OH! I thought you had been on a diet?!" So my grandmothers dissapointment, would make my mom even MORE intolerable against me and she would take it two extra steps further! Almost like "Why aren't you helping me look better infront of my mother?!" CRAZY! BUT kind of explainable! My mom WANTED and NEEDED to have some sort of success infront of my grandma! And that was purely by looks! As my Aunt - whom I mentioned before - was a stunning bikini wearing long haired free spirit, as is my cousin! And my sister is very slim and pretty, so my grandmother would gravitate to all 3 of them! It would drive my aunt CRAZY! She would be like "You TWO are FAT and you have the audacity to call my neice fat!" It's as though they failed in their own lives and HAD to prove their OWN worth via their offspring! AND WOE those kids if they didn't match up to their dream! And THAT is what I think is going on with your mother and her mother! NOTHING is good enough and they forget the person's essence that they are destroying while tryng to attain it!
Regarding your pain, I know the school year is almost over but does your HS have a nurse? IF so talk to her about this and have her phone your mom! Teachers would have to phone my mom to come pick me up too! So have someone else shine the spotlight on the fact that your mother is NOT doing anything for her daughters pain! I bet she doesn't have this! I find women worse then men about painful periods - IF they don't have them! They have NO sympathy as they think that "How can it be THAT bad?"
Regarding the "If I had my way" That's a deep one, that I don't talk about! - No need to apologize on that one OK? As It's just something a long time ago!
You know how I mentioned about your mom and her moms relationship? WELL what happened the other day says a LOT! NOT about what you did, BUT what SHE didn't! She was late, couldn't care less, and didn't thank you for picking up her slack for HER parents! This is a BIG signal of how she feels about her mom! I think your mom is VERY closed off to her truth! She might have lead you to believe everything was fine with her mom, BUT I really don't think that is true! Also I have another theory about what she did and thus did to you, is that you doing ALL of this, shows that you have more in you than she did and also it would give her another chance to make herself look better - IF you hadn't done anything! Does this make sense? Kind of like "SEE mom what I have to do because Claire didn't do a darn thing all day, I told you she was lazy etc. etc. etc." And what you have to remember is this Claire, THIS is NOT about YOU! It's about your mom and more than likely her mom!
When I was young - before 14 - I was flat chested, over weight, MAJOR zits, glasses etc! I was bullied (tortured) at school, and treated just the same at home! The boys and girls called me fat and a looser and school, THEN I came hom crying to tell my mom, and then she would turn around and say the same thing - even after she knew I was devestated! So it was a double whammy! My Grandma was a big woman as was my mom, and they would BOTH stand there and my GM would say to my mom she was fat, my mom would transfer that pain and insult right away too me! It was the WEIRDEST thing EVER! EVERY time I would phone my grandma it went like this "Hello Darling! How is your diet going?" And when we picked her up at the airport her first words were "Hello Darling, OH! I thought you had been on a diet?!" So my grandmothers dissapointment, would make my mom even MORE intolerable against me and she would take it two extra steps further! Almost like "Why aren't you helping me look better infront of my mother?!" CRAZY! BUT kind of explainable! My mom WANTED and NEEDED to have some sort of success infront of my grandma! And that was purely by looks! As my Aunt - whom I mentioned before - was a stunning bikini wearing long haired free spirit, as is my cousin! And my sister is very slim and pretty, so my grandmother would gravitate to all 3 of them! It would drive my aunt CRAZY! She would be like "You TWO are FAT and you have the audacity to call my neice fat!" It's as though they failed in their own lives and HAD to prove their OWN worth via their offspring! AND WOE those kids if they didn't match up to their dream! And THAT is what I think is going on with your mother and her mother! NOTHING is good enough and they forget the person's essence that they are destroying while tryng to attain it!
Regarding your pain, I know the school year is almost over but does your HS have a nurse? IF so talk to her about this and have her phone your mom! Teachers would have to phone my mom to come pick me up too! So have someone else shine the spotlight on the fact that your mother is NOT doing anything for her daughters pain! I bet she doesn't have this! I find women worse then men about painful periods - IF they don't have them! They have NO sympathy as they think that "How can it be THAT bad?"
Regarding the "If I had my way" That's a deep one, that I don't talk about! - No need to apologize on that one OK? As It's just something a long time ago!
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Damn, knew I was wrong! XD
You know what, if anyone ever makes a comment, not necessarily mean or bad, but a generalized statement about her family, she gets really defensive and tries to say its not true, when she knows very well its true %-) but yet if you say it about someone else she agrees! and something else, when everyone get together, she tries to be the "good" daughter and aunt and sister...so maybe she is trying to show off, because sometimes I find it annoying! (even though I guess I try to do that too, to prove i'm better than my brother :$ ) And its so true!!! my grandma would totally be like, you were home all day! and she is always like, how come you haven't done this.. >:( Crazy c**p!! so I guess your right, and her life wasn't so great either...so weird!! but then how do I change it so shes not like that with me!? and using me against my grandma! ro fix her relationship!? if I bring it up she would totally deny everything! and say its not like that, and pretend everything is good as always...she tries to be the peacekeeper in the house, yet she creates c**p!
again...you make me see things I never did! Guess because you lived it and figured it all out! like you said before, my grandmas bluntness and not being good enough didn't start out with me :-( stupid people have to make people feel bad!
ummm...I don't know if theres a school nurse or not %-) there probably is, but i've never seen one or heard of one %-) But I get embarrassed talking to people about that stuff, even though its whatever and every girl gets it but ya...i'll just wait until I get it again and then beg her to take me lol whenever that is! And nope, she didn't have periods like mine, my aunt did though, I found out...Lol well men can't say anything because they have no clue and they probably get scared of what we would do if they said anything lmao PMS scares them, even though its nothing like you see on movies XD but ya, my friend didn't understand why I would stay home..more like I can handle mine so suck it up.
People... 8-| XD
You know what, if anyone ever makes a comment, not necessarily mean or bad, but a generalized statement about her family, she gets really defensive and tries to say its not true, when she knows very well its true %-) but yet if you say it about someone else she agrees! and something else, when everyone get together, she tries to be the "good" daughter and aunt and sister...so maybe she is trying to show off, because sometimes I find it annoying! (even though I guess I try to do that too, to prove i'm better than my brother :$ ) And its so true!!! my grandma would totally be like, you were home all day! and she is always like, how come you haven't done this.. >:( Crazy c**p!! so I guess your right, and her life wasn't so great either...so weird!! but then how do I change it so shes not like that with me!? and using me against my grandma! ro fix her relationship!? if I bring it up she would totally deny everything! and say its not like that, and pretend everything is good as always...she tries to be the peacekeeper in the house, yet she creates c**p!
again...you make me see things I never did! Guess because you lived it and figured it all out! like you said before, my grandmas bluntness and not being good enough didn't start out with me :-( stupid people have to make people feel bad!
ummm...I don't know if theres a school nurse or not %-) there probably is, but i've never seen one or heard of one %-) But I get embarrassed talking to people about that stuff, even though its whatever and every girl gets it but ya...i'll just wait until I get it again and then beg her to take me lol whenever that is! And nope, she didn't have periods like mine, my aunt did though, I found out...Lol well men can't say anything because they have no clue and they probably get scared of what we would do if they said anything lmao PMS scares them, even though its nothing like you see on movies XD but ya, my friend didn't understand why I would stay home..more like I can handle mine so suck it up.
People... 8-| XD
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It's hard to deal with people who are set with their behaviours! When I figured out my mom, it helped ME, then our relationship! It was like an awakening, I saw her as this upset little girl, that could NEVER be what she was supposed to be OR demanded to be! It was a much better time - BUT I was 33!!! So how do we solve you before then? I don't think you can SOLVE her, BUT you CAN solve how YOU deal with it! It is ALL about just accepting - but NOT allowing! So accepting that your mom is like this BUT not allowing her to demean you! So if she said something like "Well you look overweight in that Claire" Just say something like "well I like it and because you have standards for me that I can NEVER meet, we will just agree to disagree!
As I told you about my son, well he and I were in counselling today, and what I am learning is NOT to immediately meet him when he is in a bad mood - and vica verca! So this way we aren't climbing the anger mountain together we step back and evaluate ALL we can do is change ourselves NOT others! So YOU change how you deal with it OK? Even if you go into your rooom and sob your heart out, infront of her stand your ground, and say the truth! IF she hurts you, say something like "Wow mom, you sure know how to hurt your own child! Why is that?" Stuff like that! I wonder IF I had done that, how things would have worked out!? Can you imagine "You know I HATE you and wish you were dead!"!, "Wow! I didn't think a woman was even capable of being so evil to her own child!" Can you imagine?! So I'm, not saying be confrontational, BUT don't stand for this childish, hurtful behaviour anymore! IF she looks in a mood, walk away, and DONT engage! Say something like "Obviously you are having a bad day, and So am I so it's best if I leave right now, before we end up hating each other again!" It's time for children to start putting stuff back nto their parents laps for them to deal with!
As I told you about my son, well he and I were in counselling today, and what I am learning is NOT to immediately meet him when he is in a bad mood - and vica verca! So this way we aren't climbing the anger mountain together we step back and evaluate ALL we can do is change ourselves NOT others! So YOU change how you deal with it OK? Even if you go into your rooom and sob your heart out, infront of her stand your ground, and say the truth! IF she hurts you, say something like "Wow mom, you sure know how to hurt your own child! Why is that?" Stuff like that! I wonder IF I had done that, how things would have worked out!? Can you imagine "You know I HATE you and wish you were dead!"!, "Wow! I didn't think a woman was even capable of being so evil to her own child!" Can you imagine?! So I'm, not saying be confrontational, BUT don't stand for this childish, hurtful behaviour anymore! IF she looks in a mood, walk away, and DONT engage! Say something like "Obviously you are having a bad day, and So am I so it's best if I leave right now, before we end up hating each other again!" It's time for children to start putting stuff back nto their parents laps for them to deal with!
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