I can't stop cutting myself and I don't know why?¿

You can't just simply hope that someone will have the answer to that.
I have had that problem since I was in 8th grade and I'm a junior now in high school [four years now] I've stopped for a while and every time i have the urge i just sit on my futon in my tv room and find a website with stuff about cutting and read instead.
I don't know why it helps out but it does.

There isn't a simple way to stop, there never will be.
I mean, it wasn't so simple to start was it?
You weren't randomly like, "I'm just going to sit here and cut myself so i can get addicted and mess up my whole life."
The mistakes you do, make you who you are today and in the future.
This though, is not a mistake you want to have in your life.
Going around regretting, having scars trying to hide them, one day someone will see and find them.

Be careful.
Be safe.

Understand that your ruining your life and the lives of others.

Please think of what you are doing.
Please.

Hi everyone,

I'm 29 years old, and have been a cutter myself for pretty much my entire adolescence... The reason I did it, was because I was very shy and introverted, for me it was a way of dealing with the (emotional) pain I felt, whenever something challenging or bad happened, I'd cut myself and to see the blood released from the cut, was kind of a physical manifestation of the pain I felt... Seeing the blood be released and the scars heal, made me feel better... The whole healing process of the physical scar, also healed the emotional "scar"...

But as I grew older. I realised that it's not worth it... You need to face your own fears and challenges, and handle them ! I know it's not easy for someone who's introverted, but just give it a try, you'll be surprised at your own capabilities...

And, as far as doing it to be "cool" or "in"... Ask yourself: "Who am I doing this for !??" The answer would be quite easy, no one.. You're going to be the one left with the scars... There were 2 times where I cut myself soooo deep, as you grow older, those scars look HORRIBLE... I have one disgusting one on my upper arm, and a deep gash scar on my wrist...

In 10 years time, what are you going to tell people, when they ask you about the "very obvious" scars ? In 10 years time it's not going to be cool anymore... YOU're going to be the one stuck with them, and by then you're not even going to remember what it was that upset you so much, that you felt you had to cut yourself...

So, PLEASE stop !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Rather get a diary (you can lock), write EVERYTHING that's bothering you, hurting you etc inside, write poems if you want to... It helped for me, and I'm 100% sure it will help for you, if you decide that you don't want to talk to someone about it... ;-)

After reading all of these stories of young teens cutting theirselfs it really broke my heart. All of you seem to amazing people with the lack of love and trust. I was at that stage when I was 17, I am now 35 and have a family. I still get really depressed but I try to not let ither people and their emotions towards me get to me. Your better then that. You have a great talent in writing. Focus on the positive things in your life. I am always here as a friend. My son at the age of 13, was also cutting himself. When I found that out my whole parenting skills changed for the better. I wish you all the luck.

Hi my names kim. Ive been cutting since i was 12 and although young at the time i was fully ware of what i was doing. I am still not sure of how i got the idea to cut but somehow i knew my pain would be greater with each and every cut and take my mind of of the actual pain i was going through in my life. I always just felt like no one took the time to sit down and listen to how i was feeling. I felt like no one truely ever saw my soul. I had alot of freinds being popular, having money, getting everything i wanted but all those things did not bring me to my happiness. I had one friend that i could tell absolutely anything to and not many of those kinds of friends came around. I would be able to sit there and cry on her shoulder and tell her about anything. She convinced me to work on my cutting and even offered me help, i agreed with the not cutting but i denied that i needed help. I stooped cutting for about 3 months and than once again something big hit me and i collapsed. It got so bad that my parents sent me to a behavioral boarding school when i had just turned 14. Things worked out for me there and i was not able to cut do to extra supervision. I learned to love myself also. I got out of the school and was a new young lady. Things were going okay and my family life had improved but i still continued to no feel the complete happiness. I felt like i was faking a smile and after a few months i broke away from my parents and there life . Although we lived in the same house i no longer talked to them. The only person who i had in my life who supported me was my boyfriend who took care of me . The hardest thing for us was lived 6 states away. I became a rebel and did what i wanted to and allowed no one to get in the way. I am now 15 years old, and the only thing that i have going good for me in my life is my amazing boyfriend soon to be fiance. I began cutting about a month in a half ago and basically the only thing stopping me from killing myself. No one understands me or takes the time to listen to me. I have no family who supports me anymore and those who did either want nothing to do with me or just are ignoring me. I feel alone. I am along. I live with my mom and dad but we no longer talk. Things are hard and i ask God every day why me. But in the back of my mind there is always something telling me not to give up. Right now i have 28 scas on my left arm still in the processing of healing, i want to cut more but it hurts my boyfriend. The blood dripping down reminds me of all the sorrows being washed away.Life is tough. I caint do it anymore..

i cant stop. every time i try. it just comes back worse. its like a monster. its ruining my life but my mom can't find out. i cant tell her. i dont want therapy. what can they do? i doubt many of them have gone through this. what will they know? if i cut i feel better. its not like im really hurting anyone. noone needs to know

dear EVERYONE who is reading this...

first of all, if u don't cut, please don't judge anyone. its not their fault.
second of all, i can relate. ive been cutting for a long time. i dont want to say, its embarrassing. i have episodes where it goes away, and then itll come back worse then before. i cut on my thigh, my shoulder, stomach, side. etc. just not on my arms, face or legs.

First of all, therapy is an OPTION. No one is going to MAKE you talk about how u feel, but trust me. if there's even one friend you can really trust, then talk to them. because you NEED someone to confide in. [well, i do] i have a psychiatrist and a therapist but they aren't a great help. they're just there for my vintage actually. its just a good idea for SOMEONE to know so you can talk to them about it. it comes down to this, pure and simple.

No one can MAKE you stop. No one can MAKE you get help. No one can HELP you unless you WANT it. I cut for the feeling that i get from it, its like a temporary high, and i like the pain honestly. yes, its sad. but its true, and if that's what helps then that's what helps.

cutting is NOT a bad thing. you have to be CAREFUL, but its not a bad thing, so don't feel guilty. people always have reasons for what they do.

in the end, it really comes down to u. what do you WANT, what do you NEED, and what can you DO? :-)

hope this helped.

-MM

I've been cutting for about 4 months and have no clue how to stop. Ive tried everything. My friends know and stuff, but its like every time I feel horrible i just cant hold it in and the only way i know how to make it go away is by cutting. Do you have any advice???

i used to b a self harmer and i find it really hard sometimes to stop myself from starting again. but there are some really good support systems out there that can help and help u to understand y u do it to urself. hope u figure it out and if u need to talk send me a message and i will be happy to help.

I'm 16, I'll be 17 on August 3ed.

I've been cutting since I was... 11 or so. Maybe a little younger. But it wasn't serious until I was about 14 and a half.

Although I'm not "officially" diagnosed, I'm positive that I have manic depression--which is also known as bipolar. Only also with regular/clincal depression. Self-diagnostic tests and sh*t online like to say I definitely am. I just can't have people in my family or sh*t knowing, so that's why I'm not officially diagnosed.

It's off and on for me. For awhile it was pretty bad. Then it slowed. Then it started faintly again when I started going out with my girlfriend, who also cuts. And for awhile, later, I stopped, because she started to stop. She started again, and for awhile I stayed in control, only rarely cutting myself a little. But it got pretty bad recently--you kinda know it's bad when I start carrying around a razor blade and actually cut myself at school, friends' houses, public bathrooms.

I figured as long as I didn't go back to my arm until it started getting colder again, so I could hide it, I was in control. That if I stayed away from my arm, no matter how red and cut up my thighs were, that I had managed myself in some way.

But I lost control again. Recently. Tonight, actually.

I don't want help. Talking to people only makes me want to slice myself more--and to rip out their eyeballs and shove my razors down their throats. I can't STAND talking to people. Medicine isn't an option either--for one, we don't have adequate medical insurance to cover it; two, we're poor, we couldn't afford it; and three, because my dad nor my family absolutely can't know. I just can't have that.

I've tried many methods to stop myself. Red sharpie instead. Rubber bands. Ice with salt. Making a card with a loved one's name on it--if you can cut that person up, you can do it to yourself. I didn't even hesitate to slice the card up, then myself tenfold.

I'm not suicidal. While I do wish I could die, that it'd be just so much easier, I can't let myself be burdened with other peoples' annoyance at me. There are a few friends--if I could make them hate and utterly despise me, then I could allow myself to die.

But I can't stop cutting.

And I really don't know what to do.

i started cutting when i was 13 due to boyfriend problems and i couldnt find a way to end it. when i found out a friend of mine was doing it a realized what a big problem this was and how it would hurt my loved ones if they found out. now my friend and i are working together to end our cutting. finding someone to help you and talk to you when your depressed is a effective way to stop yourself from cutting.

you need to feel like you worth something, not just a blank in peers life and likley your doing it to grab atention...... let me know how that works out champ

I'm an adult and cut maybe once as a teen when I was really, really depressed. This past winter was awful. I have bipolar and was in the throws of anorexia and incredibly miserable. Some people say they cut to make the pain real and visible. For me, it was that I would get so upset, almost go into a psychotic episode where I was detached from reality and I didn't know what to do with myself or how to cope. I would feel frantic, shaking and crying and so angry at myself and how I was feeling. I was so overwhelmed by everything that I resorted to cutting. It was some weird temporary release. It was very strange how it just started happening. I would wake up clawing at my arms with this foreign idea in my head saying "slice your wrists". It was a short-term distraction when I was really upset. I would see the blood, feel the sting, and relax. Shortly after I would come out of my psychotic cloud and think "oh my god, what did I just do?" I hid it from everyone. It became more and more frequent, and that scared me. I made a conscious effort to resist the urge. I haven't cut in almost 6 months. I go to counseling and take meds and all that fun stuff. What made me stop was realizing how addicting it was, how I wouldn't be able to hide it, and how I would have scars forever. I began to eat more and just "rode out" the 9 month depressive episode and am now doing better, not great, but not self-harming or suicidal.

All I can suggest is figuring out WHY you're doing it, make a conscious effort to resist the urge, and find some other way to cope and distract yourself. I know that's easier said than done. The mind is a powerful thing and unfortunately it can turn on us. If you can, please seek some help. There are 24 hour hotlines out there where you can call and just talk until the urge passes.

this might not help but a mate of mine used to cut so we sketched a really beautiful butterfly on her favourtie cutting spot and her goal was not to cut until the sketch came off. it was only done with ballpoint pen so it only lasted about a week at max but it helped her to cut down and then eventually stop by setting little goals. i dont know if itl help any of you but it is something you could try, you can draw anything you want, the entire point is not to cut the drawing ae.

I started when I was 11, I'm now 13.I stop cutting like 4 months ago. It's addicting to cut. I couldn't stop either, but when my friend say me they made me talk to them about it. After that I stopped. Talking about it really does help.

I started cutting myself when I was 13 now I'm 18.. almost 19 and I'm still cutting so I've been at it for about 6 years. It's been the only way I was able to deal with stuff like family problems, problems at school back when I was younger. Now that I'm older, I'm dealing with relationship problems, the stress of bills because I live on my own, still some family problems and other drama with people who live nearby me (I live in a rough part of town, low income part because right now I can't afford anything else) :-(

I also have had depression my whole life, anxiety problems and bipolar. It's so hard, I tried to kill myself a couple times too. I'm seeing a phsyciatrist and a counselor, been on several different kinds of anti-depressants and mood stabilizers. The only thing that ever helped me to resist cutting was a drug called ativan. You put it underneath your tongue and it dissolves so you just need to resist cutting for like 5 to 10 minutes then the drug starts to help and it mellows me right out and I feel more calm and then I don't cut myself. The problem is, my phsyciatrist won't prescribe me any more (and a lot of doctors won't) because a lot of people get addicted to it and abuse the medication. (something I haven`t and will not do)

You can get it from PhD certified websites without a prescription but you'd have to pay a lot of money for them since most insurance companies wont cover that because it isn't prescribed. Or I could get it off the street for a decent price but it's hard to come across. Right now, I'm trying to switch phsyciatrists so that I will be able to get prescriptions of ativan long enough to help me keep from cutting myself until I'm more able to deal with the problems without medication and hopefully even minimize the problems in my life, like when I move away from here to go to college I'm thinking things will be easier because I'll be living with my boyfriend and not have so many worries.

If you're cutting, the best thing to do is to ask your doctor about ativan or a drug like ativan because that's the only thing that helps right away (like for the here and now) and in the meantime, see a counselor so then you can work on fixing the underlining problem. Also, make an appointment to see a phsyciatrist in order to get ativan (although a family doctor might prescribe it) and in order to get on some anti-depressants and whatever other kinds of medication might help you. Just make sure you don't use ativan very often, only when you feel a very strong urge to cut because if you use it too much, you'll get addicted and that's just another problem to face.

I hope this helps anyone who is cutting and doesn't know what to do to stop. (& let's hope I can get another prescription for ativan)