You should really try to speak with someone about this before you do something that you will regret for the rest of your your life.
OK I see how this is, I wish first to ask if your depression is controlled? If not, get to where you are not having huge highs and lows in minutes.
At 15 you’re in High school about 10th grade? So there are a lot of girls in the school for you to talk to, flirt, and date. Jr high school girls have not caught up to where they need to be, as their environment is not the same as yours.
Now I have a married daughter, who at 18 or so, started to date someone 36, which is only 4 or 5 years younger than I am, her father, she has three kids and are on their 9 years together, so it is OK to do this, as long as the girl is of state legal age. I started dating her mom at 15 & I was 18, but the state and her parents did not mind, as I was a military personal.
Next personal thing is BBFeet9 is correct, being with someone, trying to, or some one thinks you are bothering them, too young for you, or that her parents do not like you, will cost you a life time of of legal hell, I am there......
RT
Please don't beat yourself up over this. No need to feel like a creep either. Yes, this is normal, if only a few more of us
would care to admit it. You are 15 yeras old find yourself attracted to girls "5 years younger or so", so you're talking about
girls around the age of 10 or even slightly younger, maybe 8 or 9?
Remember that girls of that age are just entering into adolescence, the beginning of their journey into sexual maturity.
Their bodies are changing and, unconsciously, starting to send out signals towards the opposite sex (or even the same sex). Mentally and emotionally they are also changing and sensing these changes, again often unconsciously. As they start to develop physically, they may also become more playful or flirtatious. Some people are more attuned to and aware of these girls and the innocent beauty and charm they exude. They now begin to have a sexuality, although they are not yet sexual beings. In other words, they start to become sexually attractive to some people, because their young bodies are sending out these signals, even though they may have no sex life as such. Don't forget also, that even if some girls of this age may already be exploring themselves, even masturbating, they are not likely to feel ready for sex, or a relationship with someone who does want it.
Think logically for a moment. Even if you were able to develop friendships with 10 year old girls, how long would they last? How far could you take such a relationship? You could hold her hand, maybe even sit her on your lap and cuddle her. How would she react if you wanted to kiss her? Even if she did respond to your kisses, how much further could you take it? Would you want to fondle her through her clothes? Slip you hand inside her top and caress her bare skin? Take it off and start to caress and kiss her young nipples? Perhaps you'd want to put your hand up her skirt? Squeeze her bottom? touch her between the legs? Take off her panties and explore inside her with your fingers? Would you expect her to play with your erection, or even allow you to push it up inside and have intercourse with her?
Even if all of this somehow came to pass, how long would it be before you were found out and punished for it though? So, sadly, you cannot follow through on these feelings towards these girls. They are unattainable in our culture. Possibly, you will grow out of this attraction in a while, but you may also find that you will reach the age of 20, 30, 40 or beyond and still look at them in the same way, these little fairies, these little princesses. That is all they will ever be for you, just dream creatures, just a fantasy that can never truly be indulged.
For now, you may be able to satisfy these feelings somewhat by browsing through swimwear or underwear catalogues. These are full of very lovely looking models dressed in bikinis or pretty panties. Perhaps you can get some relief from looking at them, or perhaps you already do? There is also and abundance of imagery available online without the need to look for child porn. Whatever you do, try not to draw attention to yourself when you spot a pretty young girl passing by. Once you are labelled, the mud will begin to stick and affect your other relationships with friends, family, school or work mates.
You have been so brave coming here to asks these questions. It must be a very difficult thing to admit to or seek help with, unless anonymously. I only wish I had a better answer for you. I hope that your depression has started to lift and that you feel able to move forward in your life, developing more appropriate relationships and even a special one with someone closer to your own age?
Console yourself with the fact that, even were you to find an amenable young girl, the reality of the encounter would more than likely be nowhere near as good or satisfying as the fantasy of it.