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I have been with my partner 10 years and we have 3 amazing kids and another on the way, our sex life is just the best ever the past year, to be honest i caught him masturbating one night, and from that we have learned to try new things and ( it gave me a shock to maybe try a bit harder to please him) so i did, i bought a wig, outfits I put a tan on regular and I have even died my hair from Plum back to blonde. I look good well I think I do. and i made our sex life good. we try having sex often, but if not were very touchy and talking about what we would do to each other, we call each other sex names all the time and always sneak a feel or something in everyday. (the perfect life) i have the most amazing man ever, and i know i do, but he hurts me so much,
i have found loads of images on the computer of girls he has looked up. if i go to bed early, i can hear him getting off. i have caught him a few times and walked in on him a few times too. i went away for a night a while ago and when i returned he has been looking up porn and Local Girls in the area, he told me that it didn’t feel right doing it and stopped straight away. And said he was trying to help himself to stop having wet dreams. That’s why he looks up porn. if we go out he is always looking at other women, (blonde) to me he is always looking for something better, would never be proud of to hold my hand if were together or shopping or anything like that in public he is always looking over my shoulders when we go out,. i caught him masturbating in the bed beside me one night, i got jealous and i got up had a freezing shower and came back to bed to have sex with him. he ejaculated almost instant, and he got upset cause he said he would like to last a bit longer, and he made me feel so sorry for him, I never said anything that night as I was shocked that he lied to my face, I confronted him another night and he just said sorry that he loves me and he does not know why his eyes wonder and he looks up porn to try and to stop himself ejaculating so quick when we have sex.
I am so hurt and betrayed and I feel even cheated on,. every little thing he has done I have bitten my lip. Listened to his excuses and just got over it, but now I am emotional and pregnant and I have bottled up too much that im going to explode,
I remember our daughters christening day. There was over 30 people and all he wanted to do was buy my brothers (blonde Girlfriend ) a drink, I didn’t even have one, I fell out with him that night, and forgave him. Why?
I don’t think he would cheat on me. But sometimes I think it would be easier if he did,
I hate feeling like this, I cry almost every night, I have even slept on the sofa one night after catching him masturbating, he sneared and said sorry to me, I pretended I could not sleep. I just didn’t want to be near him. Everything bothers me now, I don’t want him to touch me lately, my heart hurts so much, I am tearful all the time. Im on the computer trying to find out what to do. I feel like I have lost him. And my heart is broken,
I do admit that I am a jealous person but I don’t do any of these things to him,

am i just been emotion because im pregnant.....

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I' m sorry to say, he sounds like he has issues with sex addiction, and he also sounds very passive aggressive... and i think that the two of you need counseling. Him for his issues and you for the betrayal...... You are overlooking too much and making wayyy too many excuses for his behavior.....I hope you get some help...there is alot to lose.
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Men enjoy masturbation. Even if sex with you is great...even if you are a porn star...He is still going to masturbate and fantasize about other women. Im sorry, this is just life. Accept it.

Doesnt matter who you are, this is what he is going to do. Sounds like you just need to focus on yourself!
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I understand your hurt. However im a hypocrite. I do it,masturbate and watch porn, but since finding out my partner secretly does it (when im sleeping or not in) im so hurt and my confidence is shattered. I really dont want to feel this way as i know its normal, christ i do it myself. I need help getting over this as i had it out with him, we talked, he reassured me it didnt mean he didnt find me attractive etc, but it plays on my mind constantly. I dont want to ruin an otherwise amazing relationship over this, b ut im afraid its going that way as i see him different now and sex with him feels different xxx
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Time to reconsider your emotions. Women tend to think their emotions are most important. They are not. Your home, your children, your marriage, your support. You have it all, so you find something, anything to make you upset. Leave him alone, he loves you, he makes love to you, love him as he is.
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I feel the same way too
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