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Unless you are a parents and in fact preferably a mother yourself, it can be hard to have a clue about baby showers, what goes on during baby showers, or what gifts to buy for the expectant mom and her baby.

Unless you are a parents and in fact preferably a mother yourself, it can be hard to have a clue about baby showers, what goes on during baby showers, or what gifts to buy for the expectant mom and her baby. Actually, add non-Americans to the list of people who have probably never been to a baby shower, although they are becoming more popular in other parts of the world as well.

Unless you are the one organizing or hosting the shower in question, the gift you give is your most important thing to think about. But how are you supposed to know what gift you should get your friend, or even worse vague acquaintance or co-worker, for her baby shower? Don't worry. We are here to help you out.

Here at Trying To Conceive, we know that baby showers can be intimidating and confusing, especially for people who are not parents (yet). So we'll help you out with a quick list of dos and don'ts for any baby shower you might attend. Of course as always, we also welcome comments, questions and suggestions from parents and non-parents alike!

Do...

1) Check if the person for whom the shower is "thrown" has a registry for baby items somewhere. It is better to ask the baby shower host, usually a close friend or relative of the expectant mother, than the mother herself. If a baby registry does exist, that will help you pick out a gift that the mom will actually use, and be happy with.

2) Give something that is very personal. If you knit, sew, scrapbook, or do anything crafty, making something that offers that additional personal touch will be much appreciated. By the same token, if you are an accountant, getting a piggy bank for the new baby might be cute, for instance. If you come from Peru, get a baby poncho. OK, those are some pretty cheesy examples, but I am sure that you get the point.

3) Keep in mind that newborn clothes will definitely be the Number One gift any new mom will receive, so forget about those unless they are something really special.

Don't...

1) Forget that the new mother will also have wishes, and not just the baby! Some good books to read while nursing her new baby, or a gift card for a local spa (but a gift card that doesn't expire any time soon!) are also wonderful gifts for baby showers!

2) Buy gifts without consulting others first. Baby showers are normally organized by people who know what the mom to be already has, and still needs. Coordinating with the key people in the mom's life will ensure that the gift you get is something she will be happy with! OK, I realize that I already said something similar under "dos", but this is a very important point!

3) Think you have to take out an additional mortgage to pay for a gift. Big ticket items can be bought together with other people if you want to give something expensive like a stroller, car seat, or crib.

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