Humans crave novelty. Research suggests it's because novelty sometimes comes with exciting rewards, and we're hard-wired to want those. We also really like fresh starts — and the reason is equally simple. When we start with a "clean slate," we can uncouple our past outcomes from our hopes for the future, making us believe we can do better this time.
These two inherent features of human nature and behavior probably explain why we make New Year's Resolutions. The practice has deep roots, stretching back more than 4,000 years when ancient Babylonians practiced a version of New Year's Resolutions.
The problem? They don't work. Only 9.2 percent stick with their New Year's Resolutions.
The rest fail, and that's a problem. Just like we love novelty, rewards, and fresh starts, we hate failure. Failing often makes us feel so bad that we go do it some more, on purpose — think "oops, I cheated on my diet, I might as well eat a whole cake now."
Why Do New Year's Resolutions Fail?
Have you ever sat down at your favorite restaurant after a long, hard, and meal-free day at work only to order half the menu? Did it seem like you could easily eat all that when you placed your order but did you feel full after just a few bites? New Year's Resolutions are a bit like that, except they're more likely to involve promises to eat less than a food bonanza.
"My life can be better and happier this year! I'll be fitter, healthier, more productive, and I'll practice acts of kindness," you might think. You are probably biting off more than you can chew for the wrong reasons.
So, what were you planning to commit to this upcoming year? If you're anything like most people, your New Year's Resolutions are on this list:
- Losing weight or eating a healthier diet.
- Self-improvement-related goals such as being more organized or productive.
- Making smarter financial decisions.
- Quitting smoking.
- Doing more exciting things.
- Spending more time with family and friends.
- Working out regularly.
- Learning something new.
- Helping others more often.
- Finding the love of your life.
What Is the Problem with Those Goals?
In case you're wondering, there's no problem with any of these goals — except perhaps finding the love of your life, which is out of your control (committing to dating would be a better goal).
If you want to do New Year's Resolutions, research has found that those that involve doing things (like working out or spending time with family) are more likely to be successful than those that involve not doing things (not smoking or not eating as much). You're also more likely to be successful if you have smaller milestones to keep you on track and social support.
Give it a go if you must, and if you do, make positive goals (about doing things) rather than negative goals (about not doing things).
Why Not Make New Year's Resolutions?
We make New Year's Resolutions because of the so-called "fresh-start effect," in search of novelty and reward. The immediate success floods our brains with dopamine, which causes reward-seeking behaviors.
The novelty wears off, and when we don't feel very rewarded, we go off in search of quick-fixes, often reverting to past choices. That's right; we often end up doing exactly what we said we wanted to avoid, such as over-eating, smoking, or watching Netflix all night.
We then feel worse about ourselves than we did before.
And if you're just making New Year's Resolutions because "everyone else is doing them" or because your friends or relatives are pressuring you into them, or indeed because you feel you have to, just don't. No goal that you don't either really want to or have to reach is within your grasp.
Go about the changes you make in your life in a gradual but methodical manner with true commitment. Research the best ways to reach your goal — by, for instance, looking at accountants or investment advisors, trying a few sports to see which you actually like, or looking at the best charities to support. Then take baby steps.
Gradual changes often work better than sudden ones, but if you want to make sudden changes, you'll need support. You're more likely to find that when everyone else isn't also focused on their own New Year's Resolutions.
This year, why not promise yourself that you'll be intentional about the changes you make, and that you'll always listen to that voice that tells you you can do better? Why not go after what you really want and need, and what you can commit to in the long term?
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