Hello, I am 19 years of age. I have only been having sex for a little over a year, yeah somewhat new. I'm extremely sexual, I enjoy having sex and I'm turned on a lot of the time. When I first started having sex I was self conscious and didn't really trust the guys I was with. I have had plenty of alone time to explore myself, yeah of course everyone could use more exploration to better their sex lives but even with myself I don't always cum. I love having sex and it usually feels amazing depending on who the guys was/is but I have yet to actually cum during sex. With myself I hardly ever get off from penetration, usually it is mostly with clitoral stimulation or with toys. I'm just curious as to what else I could do/try to help cum with myself and during sex? I know thinking about the end result during sex could be a part of it but it's just pretty frustrating when they say, "Oh you didn't finish?". I try not to worry about it too much but how can I not? Any thoughts?
Much appreciated!
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I had this same issue... I did not have an orgasm due to penetration until I was 30 years old... it was only when I was truly comfortable and secure in myself was I able to truly relax and let my body do her thing. I communicated with my partner and he took the time to help me over come it....
Since you are young, have more than one partner I would not worry about this too much... simply enjoy what you are doing and stay safe. When you find the right one and you get comfortable with him and find the true trust and communication you will fins sex can be even better than you thought.
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Thank you for replying JenMar, I guess that is the answer I was hoping not to get. It's not so much embarrassing but disappointing that my partner thinks he didn't please me because I didn't cum or orgasm during intercourse with him no matter how much I reassure them it wasn't them. When I'm actually doing the deed I am not aware that I am not relaxed but I guess since I think about it I must not be. It's just very frustrating! I'd hate to have to wait until I'm older - 30ish, to start being able to finish. Ah well.. thank you (:
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Sometimes the harder you try the harder it is to realize your goal. Allow yourself to really get into it...by really getting into it and working really hard during sex will arouse you even more. Control your thoughts to erotic thoughts and things that turn you on. Before sex, insist on lots of foreplay, for him and you. I can't emphasize too much about not thinking "oh no, I'm not going to cum again". Or related thoughts...Keep your thoughts erotic and if your really putting all you have into the moment there will be really little opportunities for negative thoughts that will take away from your end result.
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