Girlfriend who is insulted by porn/masturbation

eugh. i was gradually coming round to the idea that maybe i should just admit to her that i watch porn and try to explain. i really hate lyeing to her about it but at the same time im scared she'd never talk to me again if i told her.
however if i did finally manage to talk her round, in the time it took me to do so she wouldve ranted about it to all her friends about me in anger. so f**k that plan.

My fiance and I had a bit of the same problem. I was always insecure, I had even become anorexic because of it. When I found out he was watching porn, I got upset, and we now have a deal that I will check his computer to make sure he wasn't looking at it anymore. However, your girlfriend needs to understand that it is a biological need for men to be satisfied. Men, unlike women, are programed in their DNA to basically require some sort of physical release. So, perhaps make a deal? One thing that I have found helped, is that I gave him erotic images of myself. He got the physical release he needed when I wasn't in the mood, but I didn't feel insecure, because he was only thinking about me while getting that release.

Im a 19 year old boy and for me masturbating is a normal thing. But I can see where she is coming from. She may assume that that's all you think about and thats all you want. Although none of my exes knocked me for masturbating, I wont stop just because my girlfriend thinks its a foul thing to do. What you do is your business and yours alone. Thats like you getting mad that she shaves down there. Its her business is she does or not, yah know. I mean if you to can talk about it then thats even better, but for her to get mad about that is really dumb. Every guy does it. I mean if we dont then we'd have all of that semen building up inside of us which can lead to painful testicles. Talk it out and see what you two came come to :]

This WHOLE discussion is hilarious.

 

Males actually BELIEVE that they are the only ones harboring sexual fantasies via porn! WAKE UP MEN! Women LOVE LOVE variety too. Jeez.

However, women ACTUALLY have a better chance at making these fantasies REAL. I think that secretly pisses men off.

 

So many penises on line and so little time. Sigh.

Because when a girl dances with a guy she usually ends up doing more
than dancing. also because girls are alot more emotional and would get
their emotions involved with the guy they are dancing with. When a guy
watches porn its not like he is emotionally attracted to the girls in
the porn.

I'm sorry but umm You Women are to damn sensitive! We men are visual when it comes to masturbation. I masturbate to porn my wife knows she doesn't get mad hell she masturbates to porn and she watches it for the women and our sex life is great. Look kid if your girl can't understand ditch her ass and find a girl that does.

I can understand why she'd be upset. it's not so much the masturbation (which in itself is just your raw needs, frequent and overloading) but the porn/viewing other women bit. i say stop watching if your in a relationship. you don't really need it, it's just habit that has grown.
That said, you can still masturbate to your urges. remember, the human imagination is a powerful thing. it's served us for thousands of years (porn is just acting it out for real). Besides, that's what women do when they need arousement. fantasia/imagination is very powerful when used regularly. it's more secret, more personal and a whole lot more acceptable.

I came across this topic & i have a similar problem. My fiance is always wanting to masterbate EVERYDAY even though we have a GREAT healthy sex life. The problem is i dont like him too because i dont like the idea of him getting off by watching other girls on porn sites have sex i find it degrading & a little selfish. Dont get me wrong i understand that men need to realease themself & have there moments i just dont get why he has to do it everyday when he has me to sadisfy him. I am glad that i am not the only person that is haveing a similiar problem with my finace masterbating. I am not really looking for anyone to reply im just looking for some venting & just to get this out in the open & have people to listen & read about it.

van solis, i feel your pain :(

porn is not about love making, it is not even strictly about sexual pleasure. People who watch porn are actually the ones with insecurity issues. If youll notice pornography is usually geared toward one party controlling the other. There are women fake moaning and screaming with titles such as "tight little P*##* and Huge C*ck" and other things simaliar to this. Within the last few years the sites for "Teen s**ts" and other pornography has nearly doubled. For some reason our society has taught men that instead of doing things like , respecting women especially your wife, taking care of your home, providing for your family, and providing structure and stability for your loved ones... all you have to do to be a MAN is have a huge penis or be able to control another person with your sexual abilities. . . The majority of men may very well look at Porn. That does not mean that it is a good thing to do. That actually would explain the breakdown of our society today. 1 in every 2 marriages end in divorce and more children are being brought up by a single parent or relative than ever before in history. It seems eronous to blame it all on porn but pornography is the # 1 money making business in the entire world and is easily accsessable in every home in America. Certainly this epidemic plays some role in the changing attitudes of the roles of men and women in the family and in our society today. is y,

I dont care how long ago this was posted, I need to say my piece... Let me start by telling you, I dont give half a care about your opinion, or how you feel about mine. I just feel I must make my opinion known. Maybe it just might help someone...

So. My fiance and I have come to a CONSENSUAL agreement that we both wont masturbate. Ever. And yes, it was my idea. I'm such a horrible person. I totally forced him. Want his email to ask how upset he is? Yeah. Anyway. Some people's opinions here bother me, and some dont, and it's not because their opinions differ from mine, its because of the way they portray them. Do not sit there and say that ALL men masturbate or ALL women masturbate. That is NOT true, and unless you have spoken with every single man and woman on earth, you have no right. I, myself, know people of both genders who I know for a fact DO NOT masturbate. They just dont want to or dont need to. Now, personally.. I feel that you it is completely unnecessary to get yourself off every single time you feel the need to. Wheres the control in that? Also, dont tell someone to "Just do it anyway, who cares?" Obviously, the girlfriend does. Who are you to say to go against the girlfriend there? If she doesnt like it, SHE DOESNT LIKE IT. Dont just tell the guy to say "Lol tell her to deal with it!" Why should the female have to DEAL with it? What if she wants to sleep with your best friend and tells you to just deal with it? Well, just deal with it! And before you say "Woah, wait! Thats totally different!" No, not really. To most women, its the same damn thing. And I did once see someone in here say something along the lines of "Well do you have a problem with your girlfriend masturbating? I didnt think so." Well, that was an assumption. How do you KNOW for fact he doesnt, unless you actually waited for an answer?? Seriously. A lot of guys have the mindset of "I can do this, you cant, because I am a MAN" and we all know it doesnt work that way. Now to deal with the more sensitive things. A girl saying she would like you to stop masturbating is not controlling. It's the same as telling your girlfriend you would like her to spend less time in the bathroom in the morning, or to get dressed faster when you have a reservation to an expensive restaurant. Should she start ranting and raving about how controlling you are because you want to stop something that is "natural" to her? She simply doesnt like it, and would like you to stop. If you refuse to stop, then perhaps you two arent meant to be together! You should find a girl who doesnt mind you masturbating, and she should find a guy who doesnt mind. And dont say thats impossible, because I found one. And you can say he lies to me all you like, I trust him. Ask me for his email, if you want, and enjoy yourself. Now, I've seen in a bunch of places where someone will say "She cant always be with you when you get the urge." Okay I have two things for this. One drives back up to somewhere earlier in my rant. You dont need to get off every time you feel like it. That's just... Anyway. Second, it might be true in most cases, but not all. I have been engaged to my fiance for a long while now and been 'together' even longer.. Since the official start of our relationship i have honestly been together every single moment. I am not lying nor exaggerating. We never go anywhere without each other. We sleep, bathe and in most cases use the restroom together, except at restaurants and the like. And even then, the other waits outside the door. See this how you will, I dont care. He has never complained nor seemed annoyed at this and he returns the clingy-ness just as much. I dont drag him to the bathroom - he followed from the start. Well, the first few times he asked, but after I told him he could if he wanted, he just started following every single time. He follows me every time I leave. I never make him do anything. So, I am more than capable of satisfying him whenever he calls. And I'm rarely "Not in the mood", by the way. Now. Upon speaking with him, from what he tells ME, he absolutely loves trying to get me off, or getting me off. He has stated of his own accord that his own gratification is not nearly as important. Each and every time he says he wants me. That is on him. Not me. Basically, if I am there, perfectly willing to have sex with him, and he WANTS to have sex - why masturbate? Now, ironically, we both view this as a type of cheating - a type, not exactly cheating, but a type. Because typically you are getting off with "aid" of someone else. And with that, I bring up my porn argument

I have always viewed porn as cheating. Always. You are getting off to someone who is not your significant other. That is my definition of cheating. If yours differs, alright. But that is mine. Fiance has agreed with me on this, and he sees the good point in it. If we watch porn together, that is fine. But neither of us ever do so separately. No, not even me. Porn is stupid. Porn is Fake - yes fake. The orgasms are fake. The moaning is fake. The pleasure is fake. And even watching porn to get ideas for positions is stupid. Porn positions are NOT good sexual positions... They are created for the CAMERA. Not for the PLEASURE. Most of the time, the girls cant really feel them at the angle they are at anyway. You know what a good angle is? Missionary with the girls legs OVER yours so your penis is angled slightly up. Rubs against the roof of the vagina where the g spot usually is. Back to the point... I may not think porn is entirely 'degrading' but I do think its just pointless. Even my fiance finds it mostly pointless. Also, for those who use it to get aroused... Really? You cant arouse your girlfriend on your own? Or do you just not feel like doing foreplay? See, thats one of those sensitive things for me. What kind of guy would rather use porn to get his girlfriend aroused so he could sleep with her and move on... Why not take the time, play with her and turn her on yourself? Whatever, not the point. Porn.. Stupid..


TL;DR


If you dont like your girlfriend's requests, leave. Find a girl who doesnt mind, let her find a guy who doesnt mind not masturbating. It doesnt mean the girl is controlling.

Thank you.

Cool story bro.

Your opinion on this topic is pretty 1950's. How old are you? Have you read any of the other posts here? Maybe you haven't watched porn in a while. Men and women enjoy porn. Men and women are equals. This women are givers c**p is very Mrs. June Cleaver. If you know who that is, you shouldn't be doling out advice to the sexes for getting along sexually.

Porn is cheating because your getting sexual satisfaction outside your partner! I reccomend if your in a serious relationship to get your act together or she isnt going to stick around very long.

I totally agree w u. Thanks