I've been having sex reasonably regularly for around 2 years now and have noticed that in any sexual activity, be it receiving oral, receiving a ha****b or actual sex, I can derive very little physical pleasure. It's not an issue to do with how turned on I am or anything - I have no trouble getting/sustaining an erection (aside from the obvious fact that it can be difficult to stay hard if you're but even considering this I do quite well).
Usually the first 5 - 10 seconds of any activity will feel insanely good, but after this point I can basically feel nothing. I've had sex many times and I think only ever around once or twice have I ejaculated inside my partner - and it was very hard work to get myself to that stage (since the orgasm comes almost entirely from being turned on and not from the actual physical feeling).
Even when receiving oral I have only ejaculated a few times. I often can feel very little and have to masturbate to achieve anything during sex. It's not that much of a major problem for me as it means I can basically always outlast my partners, but it would be very nice to be sensitive and actually /really/ enjoy sex.
I find myself preferring masturbation a lot of the time, and the only reason I have drive to have sex at all is really love for my partner and just general hormonal stuff.
When I was with my previous partner, after being/living together for a while I had actually begun to avoid having sex and regularly chose masturbation over it because it was easier and I could enjoy the more direct stimulation.
What could potentially be wrong with me? Is it anything fixable? Would it be possible for me to take some kind of stimulating drug that would cause sex to feel immensely good?
My apologies for the length of this and my previous post.
I would be grateful for any help/advice you could give me.
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I love my partner as well,but when i ejaculate,there is no sensation what so ever!
I went to see a specialist and he said it can be caused by alcohol and cannabis,other than that he said to wait,and see if it comes back!
Irritating i know!
Hope it helps to know your not alone!
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I'm sorry I never replied and followed on with it, because there might be other people out there looking for the same answer.
Well, the first poster mentioned marijuana/alcoholism could reduce sensitivity, however neither of these were problems for me. That said, whoever you were, thanks for your thoughtful input.
I actually never came up with a solution for this problem, however it eventually seemed to solve itself. I'm not sure if it was psychological or something; I did tend to suffer depression on and off for a while back then, fairly heavily at times. Looking at the date that I made that last post, I was actually with a new girlfriend after just splitting up from a long relationship, and started with the new girlfriend way too early. As such, as I said, I was suffering hardcore depression back then. Not sure I realised it at the time.
I am still with the same partner as back then now, and while if anything the "honeymoon period" has ended and we don't have sex as frequently or as wildly, I find it much more physically stimulating these days. I hate to say that I now spend most of my time struggling *not* to come, rather than trying to make myself. I almost wish I could go back. ;-)
So, I'm sorry this is a little inconclusive. Not really sure what changed. But now sex feels immensely good most of the time.
Good luck, other seekers of sensitivity!
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When you say you can't become aroused, do you mean just because of the lack of physical stimulation or because your boyfriend doesn't "turn you on"?
If you lack sexual attraction to your boyfriend, I guess you should try to find ways to stimulate that - otherwise, think about whether or not they're compatible with you as a partner. If you can deal without a great sex life, that's great - go for it - but if it's going to be a showstopper when it comes to marrying him (and you've been together 4 years now, so you should have an idea) then it might be time to put some thought into that.
I don't know quite enough about female anatomy to explain why you are suffering from insensitivity. It could be related to generally not being turned on, not being ready, other psychological problems or physiological problems. Maybe someone else can be more help, or speak to a doctor - but I'd suggest making your own thread because this one has been dead for a long, long time, so maybe no-one will reply other than me. :-)
Good luck, I hope you find your answers!
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I am 19 and I can't feel anything what so ever when i try to put *anything* in my rear. Any advise for that?
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I know this thread has been around for, well, years - but all the same, it was nice to read about a successful outcome. So thanks to Hackle for coming back to it. Quite often, you're just left with the question hanging on these kind of things.
Sadly, I speak from experience. I'm 42 now, and while I've always been in good physical shape, don't do drugs and hardly touch alcohol etc, I sadly cannot feel anything at all during intercourse. I love pleasuring my partner, am pretty good at it, and am happy to do so for hours, but always hanging over me is the prospect that at some point I'm gonna have to 'do actual sex'. I'm turned on for sure, but in the event it's just like trying to make love to air. Same applies to oral, or by hand - there I do get vaguely pleasant sensations but I've never even come anywhere close to climax. I can pleasure myself to climax easily enough, and very enjoyably, of course.
This isn't anything to do with her, it's always the same, regardless of partner.
The only way I ever get a climax with a partner is during penetrative sex when I'm relaxed enough to trick my mind into imagining that I can feel something. It takes massive mental effort, when frankly it should be about letting go and enjoying yourself. It gets to the point where I'd simply rather not bother.
Not the end of the world, but given that I'm otherwise a normal red-blooded male as interested in sex and women as any other man, it's just...really, really disappointing.
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hi dia, every thing will be alright, do you watch blue movies, or pornography, if so plz stop it, it can reduce your sensation, also exercise your body, and do away with alcohol, this will help improve your blood circulation and get erections. test for blood sugar and STDs like syhpillis. sorry about it
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