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i have been with my husband for 5 years and married to him for 3 1/2. we have 3 kids together. he has some anger issues. he hits me. at first it started out with him just pushing me, but now he will hit me in the face, drag me by my hair and he has even kicked me a few times after he hit me and knocked me down. he even does this in front of our kids(who are 3 and younger.) I don't know what to do. i called the cops once before and they aressted him and ME!!!! i keep telling him taht i am going to leave and he says that he will kill me. any thoughts?


Hi hon: I suspect they arressted you because you hit him back?

You need to call a domestic abuse hotline in your area, they will help you get out ASAP. ALL abusers use killing as the ultimate threat, "I will kill you, the kids, your parents, etc" Your children are in EXTREME danger as are you. But please know - depending on where you live - that you could actually loose your children IF you do not get out of there. Some duristrictions, believe that when you stay in an abusive home you are in part abusing the children. This happened to a dear friend of mines daughter who lost both of her children for almost a year, because she stayed with the abuser.

When he is out - because soon he will stop going out at all - you need to call the hotline, call the police and get protection and get out!!!! Some places are starting too insist on the abuser wearing an ankle bracelet so they know if they are anywhere near you. Which I think should ALWAYS be used for abusers, because a restraining order is a piece of paper that many abusers have walked through. So NO MORE and GET OUT NOW! This will get worse and worse, and death could be the end result. He will NEVER improve. No such thing! His "Anger issues" are NO EXCUSE, so don't give him that lea way. Let me know how everything goes OK? Good luck hon!


there are many good homes for abused mothers. what you should do is file a report that he threatened to kill you. get a restraining order. a divorce. and move away to where he doesnt know. change your addresss and your phone number(s). leave immediatley. the next time you have to call the cops tell them he threatend to kill you if you leave they must do something.
i hope this helps hun
be strong
have faith
if you decide to call and talk to someone.
ask them say "if he hits me will i get in trobule if i stab him if he hits me?"
hun stay strong things will favor to you
things will get better.
karma is a b***h.
just remember this.
good luck sweetie


after reading your post i am really concerned you really do need to get out for your safty as well as your children if i was you i would go to the police and get him arrested but that would only give you a small window to get out and go some where safe but if i was you try and find out where your local domestic violence support group is and get some help as they would be able to give you the help and support you need but i would also get in touch with a solicitor and get a restraining order in place as soon as possible hope this helps and you can get it sorted.

and all the best to the future with you and your children