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As I said in my subject, My husband hits me since the month of our marriage whenever he gets angry n apologies after his anger cools down.
When we got engaged he started loving me but after 1 month he said there is no love for me n after 10 months we got married hoping he'll love me y my mad love toi him. 3 days after marriage he said he started loving me again. Even now he tells me that he loves me but I could never feel his true love to me. His favour while getting engaged was he'll make me t0 study Masters here in USA. I'm B.S in engineering.

Let me introduce our charcters. He is tooo possisive abt his parents, sibilllings, sister, all of their respectie kids. "what he does/ his likes?" " what he owns?" . He wants to get anthying(furniture/utensils/a dress to me) to home only if he likes, nothing in our home is by my likes. I wa a elder daughter in my family before marriage had got preference, but here only scoldings n hurtings to me n my family members. My husband never spoked to my reloatives other than my father,mother n my only brother. He doesn't do anything not even a simple talk without benift or calculations. He wants high preference means he should be domiunating where ever he goes.

First time I came to USA with mny husband after marriage, went to wallmart->liked a bag of $10 asked him to buy for me-> it's not big money for him. he beat me there n in the car. Thats the day, within a month of marriage I got into this trap. Everytime he started hitting after a small argument or misunderstanding. In the first year of my marriage I was having hopes abt my husband that he will not hit me from next time as he was promising everytime after he hits me while consoling me.He started buying things he likes.I shouldn't ever tell him thats not nice he is possisive abt it n scolds me. He always wanted me to be a under dog to him. Which I cant but still tried to keep happiness in the our family.

He was always black mailing me telling divorce word I was trying to not replying him back even after he hits me because I was scared of our family being hurt by my divorcee n how can live alone in this world!. But he started talking abt my charcter. I left him n went to India my home country n as well as his. There didn't tell anybody abt this but came back within 2 months.

Felt things got better but no it didn't :( . he started getting angery n started hitiing n consoling me n getting gifts n buying things for me.
Agaiun repeating the same episode of hiting atleast weekly once. He still feels guilty for beating but he beats! He broked my hand bone when he hit my just by his hand. He again hit me even after breaKing my hand I took tablets to die, he also took, then we both managed to puke the tablets. He still hits me my bone is still not joined still 1 month I need to have the cast. but having this cast as evident of his beating he cant control his anger he hits me for silly things. He cant bear no to wat he says or does. I tryed talking to hi after his anger cools down but that works for only hours. He asks sorry n pleases me once after I'm okay He repeats the same thing.

He attracts people by making favours to them n make fame outside the family n have lot of friends. He osen't want me to put out his bad hitting qualities because he intimidates of his fame going away. His parents,sibillings and his sister praise him a lot. As if there is no other person on the earth like him. They don't like me telling abt my husband's absuive nature. His mother is the top for him I dont have problem here but she's also like him absuive my family n my relatives
Even after getting hit by him she advices not to tell anybody than her. THen afterr I tell her she plays tricks with me. My husband doesn't knows that she plays tricks. Though me n husband stays in different country than others my husband is just enough to kill me every day by his witty words n scoldings. I love him, thought several times to leave him n go away I feel like just go n hug after 2 days.
I cant bare his s;aps, hits n breaking my body parts..... WhAT should I do can anybody advice????????

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Your husband will not stop hitting you. You must go to a Shelter for Abused Women right away before you are permanently hurt, or even worse. This behaviour is against the law, and your husband will be charged with domestic violence. You can get a court order to protect you from him and forbid him to have any contact with you. His problem is rooted in very deep psychological problems, likely learned from watching similar violence in his childhood home. This abuse is rooted in power and control and will continue to recur in cycles of violence. You need to get help before it is too late.
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Wow... That's a lot going on. I am a victim of an abusive husband, as well. It won't stop. I am still trying to leave after 4 years of marriage. I have no family or money, since my husband controls it. (I also have kids which he is good to) anyway... Get out before its too late! I used to be so confident and now, I feel like complete garbage. No one knows because I'm ashamed for no good reason. Plus, I'd get hurt even more. Unlike your husband, mine is very personable. So, people will probably know of your husbands antics. Please go to counseling. I hate to hear you wanted to die! There's peace and love in this life! No one deserves this c**p, and you can be happy. He may hit your kids, if you have any in the future... Do it for them! ( My case is rear) I'll pray for you. Keep your chin up. ;-)
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Health Ace
6885 posts
You need to get away from him ------ NOW!!!!
Abusers never stop and you will just feel less and less like a competent individual the longer you allow this to go on. Believe him when he says he doesn't love you. He needs someone to be his slave. Don't be that for him.
You say you have a B.S. That should certainly make it easier for you to find a job where you can support yourself and further your independence.
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what i feel now is anger and hatred of ur husband..I also experienced getting hurt by my bf but d time we have our kid he never did it again cause he promised never to hurt me again and he changed. please get away from him..u don't deserve him,and besides u can live without him, he's not the only man in this world. We know that marriage is sacred and getting married is not an easy thing because it also involves principles but if he already beat and hit u many times like he wants to kill u i think u better ask help from women's desk. don't let him ruin your whole life..there is still big hope for you in this world. this time, don't use ur heart, u should be wise enough now to fight for ur freedom and to live a happy life without his destructions. do the right thing now while there is still hope for you to have a happy life. You've finished B.S. Engineering, you have still many opportunities and great chances you will receive in your life. You are not dumb so please don't let him beat you again. If you really love your life and your family, think many beautiful things that are waiting for you and decide.
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hi r u still with your husband or not
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hi dear they are call " helpers" they help him to stay that way they accept him and they go out of their way to make your life a living hell because they are pretending he is not committing a crime when in fact he is ..dont' live in a fantasy world where every minute you live their with him by the way he is... an abuser see him for what he really is and you will find the strength to take legal actions it is your right to live ...not with ..an abuser a raging bully plan your new life without an abuser in it . i care.
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I know i may be a little young but i too have had an abusive boyfriend i am 15 years old and he is almost 20 he will be in a few weeks and he told me he wont do it again he choked me last time i said im done so we're over and he wouldnt let me break up with him and i found myself to be pregnant and i ended up having a miscarriage bcuz he kicked me in the stomach so then i called the cops and he got locked up and got put away for 2 years i find it bull sh*t but trust me you want to end it before it gets to late
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Your not ready to leave your in love with him. You need to stay and work it out. He would not love you if he did not beat you right! When you get tiered of being beaten and you learn that love does not hurt the one you love, you will figure it out. Until than you stay
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I am going through the exact same problem. Mine was a love marriage but since the day of the marriage his abusive and violent nature has come up from I dont know where. its been 2 years now.. I am going through this hell. In the begining I thought let me give it some time. May be he will become normal.. but nothing. he beats me, pushes me, once he dropped coofee on my leg n it got badly burnt. I am also alone here in U.S without family and monetary help. But now I have made up my mind that i will get out of this abusive relationship. I trying to find some resources who can help me with my case. Once I come across someone will sure let u know too. meanwhile if someone knows where I can go for help, plz let me know. I am tired of my life too but I wont end it.. i will make it happy again, that's a promise to myself.

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I am feeling very pitty for you...while reading I cried a lot...am extremely sorry... I don't kn hw 2 console....believe in god that aIl we can do...hope god bless you...I ll pray for you..
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I can under stand ur plight as I am sailing in same boat. Now one in the world would believe that my husband could do so as he is so nice outside home. N whenever he beats me n I tell his parents, he always probes me wrong by telling hundreds of lies about me and prove himself right. After which his mom also says me that improve itself..he will be good then. I even thought of having a divorce but I keep calm due to my little baby and my own parents as they would feel bad n hurt. Can not suggest you something. Rather want suggestions for me too..
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Hi this is malti from india its been only one and half year of my marriage but my husband is doing the same as yours. I m the only daughter of my parents thats way i got lots of luv and care . Earlier i was totally unaware about my husband behavior bcoz of arranged marriage i always ready to compromise for his happiness but he never cares about my feelings So i started to speak out but bcoz of that he bcome more aggressive and using abuse language for me but now days he become physical also. But the biggest problem is he never apologies . He is very selfish. He wants only the things which he likes. He spend money on his family and friends . I want to do job but he is not allowing me. He said if i do job it would be embarrassing for him in front of his friends and family thus he is earning gud.Now i am emotionally,mentally,physically and financially helpless. My life is only about my parents otherwise i tried to suicide many times. Everything is finished for me but god give me courage and i told everything to my parents about all the things happening with me They are also very shocked and worried about me but parents are always be there in every situation of life and shows the right path. Now i feel much better then before bcoz my parents are with me I m still with my husband he still abusing me but now i m not alone my parents are with me. So i suggest u that tell ur parents about everything i m sure they will do something for u nd u ll feel better Yours regard Malti
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I am also victim of abusive husband. It's been 4 years of marriage. I stay in Netherlands, I moved from India after one year of marriage to stay with him . I don't have father or any sibling and have been brought up by maternal family. On every small issue he asks me to leave which makes me really insecure as he knows I don'the have my father. I was working and had good job in India and was independent. But here I am totally dependent on him. My whole week goes in 4 walls of house. I have 5 months old baby . I thought he would change after the baby but he is still the same. Every week he hits me , I hardly talk to him , but he is so physic that he can hit me for anything I may not even dream abt - eg I am close to my grandmother and she is not been and u was upset ( crying ) because I am not able to see her from last two years and he called me up and I told him the reason and after coming home he started beating me up for that because he doesn't like anybody crying. How inhuman can it be. So you are not allowed to cry even on the earth of someone. I feel like puppet sitting in the 4 walls . I stop meetong people or talking to anyone for that matter fr because if I end up sharing anything with him and he doesn't like he will beeat me up for that. It's really killing me everyday. I wonder if I am the only one going through this. Please advice. I really needed a platform to vent out my feelings and emotions.
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Please call cops next time he hits you or abuses you. Do not wait. I did the same mistake and came back to India from USA. You can do any work to earn your living and will be happy. Rules in foreign countries are much strict and you will get everything. You won't be dependent on any one. Government will help your child and you.

I am in 9th month of pregnancy and have to deliver my baby after 2 weeks. I am just running here and there in India and my in laws and all are using their contacts simply.

Do not care for someone who doesn't care about you. Leave him and move on. Do not worry about money or being dependent. Things will go well. You are courageous. It is better to work for self than to hurt yourself each day!! Good luck. Take care
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