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i have been married for almost a year now. My husband is abusive. he does love me but he beats me very badly.. 
when i say he loves me, he takes care of my food, my clothes, etc.. he is having a tough time managing finances but he is abusive as well... i do work too and give him all my salary(almost as much as his). and he keeps reminding me that he is feeding me and paying for my expenses.. he cares for his friends a little too much and wants to spend too much on them... they ignore me totally and sit drinking but he expects me to be lovey -dovey with them.. if i even show that i am not interested in them he beats me very badly... I am pregnant now in my 5 month and yet hte beating doesnt stop... Just the other day, he beat me so bad my head swell up and still hurting on the third day... he even threatened to beat me in the stomach... i do care for him and love him but my love isnt seeming to be enough... this has happened before and i tried to go away from him and one time he stopped me n said it will never happen again... and he doesnt even bother saying sorry and says i am provoking him.. and if i am provoking him he is going to beat me again...  what do i do ?? we in our country dont have as many good shelter homes by the govt or any counsellors... pls help

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CALL THE POLICE AND HAVE HIM ARRESTED THEN MOVE OUT.please dont stay with your husband.my husband beat me also and i have epilepsy-for the rest of my life I AM EPILEPTIC!!you need to call 911 and have them take you to the hospital love.please send me a message if you would like to talk.YOU TOO CAN BE A SURVIVOR BUT YOU GOTTA GET OUT WHILE YOU CAN........much love dalphy
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Hey thanks for replyin... i dont live in the US so the police or judicial system isnt that effective... n i am just scared to death...
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my heart goes out to you.is there any wa you can talk to you mother?tell her everything and tell her you need help to get out.this is no small situation bc he will hurt you badly or hurt your unborn child.
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This goes beyond relationship problems while being pregnant. This is a very dangerous situation. Domestic violence apparently really tends to escalate during pregnancy. Not only is that dangerous to your baby now, if you both make it through your pregnancy, do you want your child to grow up that way? Because they don't change. They don't. 

I'm not saying this to judge you. I'm not. But if you can get out now, no matter how hard it is financially, you will be so much better off. Is there any way at all you can stay with your relatives? If you can, please do. 

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Health Ace
6884 posts

OMG, I don't know how you can live with that. I know in some countries there isn't much you can about that. You shouldn't have to live like that. I wish I knew what to suggest.

Isn't there any way you can get out of there?

 

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i did talk to her about it... and she is willing to support me if i get away from him.. but taking a step is getting scary for me... there is not a lot she can do neither do i have any good friends who can stand behind me... and u know the problem is i did love him a lot.. i probably still do .. and its broken me completely havin a relation ship like this with him... 
i am broken hearted over this relationship .. n ihave lost hope that he ever will change.. he has openly said he wont... 
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my husband told me he wasnt either and he didnt.i guess he was telling me to get used to his abuse just as yours tells you. let your mother help you and divorce him.im not sure about your country but if he is beating you AND your unborn child someone shoudl want to help you find safety.inbox me if you like bc i know what you are suffering and i want to help ou if i can.STAY STRONG,HAVE FAITH and GET AWAY.much much love my sister-dalphy
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hmmm... i guess so... he doesnt seem to be even a bit sorry, wont even say the word with his mouth so there isnt a chance of him changing at all... 
what i dont ever understand is that he says he beats me because i am at wrong and dont understand until i m beaten... i have changed all my likes infact dont have ny likes.. says i shldnt have dont have a right to... 
and he says i am jealous and mean, and am a b9999 ... 
and what hurts me is that for every small thing he uses abusive language.. even when things can be ignored... 
i am just thinkin what a horrible life a child will have like this..
and then he says he hasent seen me one day smiling or happy so he feels like beating me.. how can i be happy when he is beating me?? and i m constantly thinking abt it ?
its not that i havent had any happy or good moments with him... i did ... i still do sometimes... after beating me he takes me out or tries to be loving but i m so hurt physically that i can hardly enjoy it... 
he says the more he beats me more he loves me, Really ?
he says he is like that to all the people who he loves... are they really ppl like that ?
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he is my husband reincarnated. the stage he is trying to set is to make you believe abuse is normal BUT ITS NOT NORMAL.he is not normal he is just another man who beats his wife.there are many men like him and my husband.the more you inform ourself you will realize that YOU AND BABY will be happier,safer and happier wehn you leave him.its gonna be hard for you (bc of all that you had hoped for with him) but it will be easier if you remember the life your child will have to suffer if you stay with him.it will be hard to leave him bc he wil go thru many emotions to keep youthere. he may have a sad face and act like you are abandoning him but after a week or so he will become impatient that you still want a better and safer life for your child.its at that point HE WILL GET ANGRY AND BEAT YOU SO YOULL STAY.go on and leave him bc he knows you know what hes about now.and if i learned one thing with myhusband its this:HE EITHER HAD TO BREAK ME DOWN OR KILL ME. after i left him he tried to kill me.he broke my door down and fought me sown on mycouch and as he pulled him gun i fought like the mother i am and the bullet missed me.i foudn it 3 days later inside the let out couch he had me down on.dont be afraid to leave him love BE AFRAID TO STAY.we will surely meet each other in an emergency room if you ever start to have seizures.you wont meet 'ME' but you will meet other women who have life long problems from an abusive man and my love THEY ARE ME.dont let us become you bc this is not how our mothers and fathers want us to live our lives.I LOVE yOU MY SISTER!!
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thanks a ton hun.... i have been giving a lot of thought to this and have prepared my mom too for this... i am losing any hope... i just feel i have to let out all that he is hurting me.. i have nobody to tell what i am going through... i wish there was a fairy godmother so i could leave him n this country n go so far away...
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the easy way is leave him like go to work one day and just dont show up to work go to the nearest police and report to them what is happening no matter if you may love him or not the best thing for your unborn is to get our of there get some kind of help and put that guy in jail cus what happens when he dose it to the baby a helpless child who dont know no better then to cry when it needs/ wants something ?! ( i am responding with personal feeling because my first step father abused me and my mother in may ways)
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Hi girls. Also I have the same situation right we fight and he start to beat me and I am pregnant. He beat me like a horrible on my had my stomach Omg I'm feeling so pain. And my family so far from me I'm living in Dubai. And my father he past away before two weeks ago. You know how I'm feeling very very bad this is days. What I can do ?
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Even i am going thtough the same phase. M 7 month pregnsnt. Its been a year m married. Since day 1 he had started beating me bcz i was missing my parents n wanted t speak to dem. He beated me bcz i liked her pik in facebuk. For sny small call or snything related to my choice he vil scold me n if i vil raise my voice, he beats me. He says hd loves me n in secure so venevr i dnt agree to his words, he gets angry n automatically his hsnds are raised on me. M pregnant n he beated me like anything dat i had t go to hospital to get my head and jaws chevked. Its paining like hell. He cries ven he sees me in pain after beating. But i hate it n feels like killing his family who had grown him bcz his parents takes his side and blames me.... He says i dnt love him n continously troubles me for evry action of mine be it my salary ( if i want t do something own my own)... M tired n scared. He vil nvr chng dat i hv understud. He blackmails me emotionally dat he loves me n cnt sty wdout me... M stuck.. I m also emotionally attached but i vnt trust him
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Call the hotline please
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