To everything.
Well, first of all thank you for answering and now to address your first question. How have I lasted this long? This all goes back to about my first year of high school. I was never ugly at all, but I really did not invest any time into girls when I was a younger teen. It just wasn't my thing and I didn't really care at all. I was an athlete and a class clown (in my grad survey 5 years later I did in fact get elected class clown of the grade lol). I was in a social circle that was definitely considered 'cool' but I got there because of sports and because of how funny I was. Essentially i still have a lot of energy but I was just a funny hyper kid growing up, and my friends and the girls i was friends with loved me for that. I was that crazy guy that was good at sports and could make them laugh or have a crazy time at a party haha. But since I never invested time in 'getting' girls, they never looked at me that way at all. or maybe vice versa, but the point is that I only started meeting 'new' girls around grade 10 and 11 when I was 16-17. by then I actually cared about style and girls etc, so I made myself more noticeable and I did simply just grow up and become better looking, and girls started to notice. this was also the time when parties became more than just your social circle, so I would meet many new girls.
By then though I believe that I already had performance anxiety. I look back now and say to myself that I should have started caring long ago, because I feel like I've been left behind in a sense.
I'm obviously not ready to go out there and start having a bunch of sexual partners if you know what i mean. I need something more special for me I guess so that I can get around my anxiety and THEN start having sex with everyone lol. But now its like these girls that are trying to get with me aren't aware that I'm all insecure about it so they just openly come on to me, because for the large part of the type of social scene I'm in, people aren't nervous about these kinds of things.
So yeah that should explain why despite having a decent number of willing girls, it doesn't matter. In some ways I really wish they didn't wanna participate so much haha. It wasn't always like that and now that the girls are finally ready for me, I'm not ready for them if that makes sense.
And yeah, at this point if I ejaculate half a second after going in I couldn't care less lmao, I'm just trying to get the boner first :p
And no not really much foreplay. well actually a little we made out for about 10 minutes and I had my hand in her pants, then she asked if I wanted to have sex I said 'absolutely' lol, so we got naked, and then she tried to give me a bj and thats when it just did not happen haha
R
ok so first off you have not been left behind by ANY aspect and now that you are a little "more mature" you can make smarter decisions... have you noticed the amount of posts on here from 13,14,15 year olds and wanting to have sex or haveing sex then freaking out because they are pregnate or think they might be pregnate. sex carries so many responsibilities and we need to get older to fully realize this..... so no loss there by not having sex early. i too was just not into girls like you and didnt care much about them when i was younger so you are not alone in that aspect either. now for performance. I cant say enough about foreplay. you need to get an erection before anything else. how better to do that then to do lots of foreplay. she will like the sex much more if she is good and wet and she can have multiple orgasms so most girls LOVE foreplay plus it makes it seem like you last longer that way. start off with something non threatning kissing petting fingering etc. then SLOWLY move to more sexual things.
next is there anything that you are insecure/worried about with your body/sex itself. penis size being circumcised or not circumsized, not being able to please her..... these all usually trigger sex anxiety
I'm not that worried about being left behind. I feel like yes I have been left behind, but I don't think its that much of a problem. That's not the main issue for me. The biggest problem here is just like not being scared at parties and when meeting new girls and stuff. Like you say, foreplay is completely essential. I know it is, and its so much fun too! But my problem is that i can't even get to foreplay... I'm too scared now to even start doing anything sexual like kissing because it might lead to foreplay, and that might lead to sex. I need to somehow get a mind frame where i'm not scared of sex. Cause i know foreplay is good, but right now I just shy away from anything and everything sexual. I just go to a party and drink and hvae a good time with my buddies and I hit on girls and everything but I never make a move cause i'm too worried that it'll lead to sex, and that i won't get erect again. I'm stuck lol its so brutal. Like i said in my first post I started rugby season, and everythings going great, and already have like 3 or 4 girls that want to have sex with me but i keep rejecting them!! not cause I don't want to, they are hot. but f**k my life im too worried haha.
Hey bio, and thanks so much again for taking the time to answer these posts, i really appreciate this. What you're saying is 100% true and it makes perfect sense. To get to the sex part, I need to take baby steps. But my problem has now translated to being scared of anything sexual. So a ha****b or blowjob is just as scary as sex is for me at the moment because i still need to get a boner and I know i'll get too nervous for that to happen. My problem is psychological and I just don't know where to even start so that I won't be scared any more. I know eventually it all comes down to actually just trying stuff out, but I can't even convince myself to try even the little things.
your a wee bit of a penis and need to get a grip of urself like seriously!!!!!!!!!!!!!